


nebulous

by delicatty



Category: Persona 4
Genre: Alternate Universe - Pre-Canon, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-11
Updated: 2017-02-03
Packaged: 2018-03-07 03:32:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 78,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3159638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/delicatty/pseuds/delicatty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The most brilliant things can happen by complete chance. Yosuke discovers this when he texts a wrong number and winds up with a best friend.</p>
<p>Or: AU where Yosuke accidentally texts Souji six months before he arrives in Inaba.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know if i'm entirely satisfied with this as a first chapter, but i've been sitting on it for so long i feel like i just need to post it so i can push myself to write the rest!
> 
> un-beta'd.

**October**

Yosuke thinks that everything’s going pretty well, all things considered. Sure, Inaba sort of sucks. There’s no way around it. But there’s still girls in Inaba. Girls like Chie, who’s pretty cute – the same Chie that just gave him her number, smiling all coy. The moment she disappears out the classroom door, Yosuke punches his fist into the air and goes to send her a text.

 **(15:39)** yo!

Too soon? Well, she can reply whenever she likes. It doesn’t matter. The important thing here is that he’s got her number, after all.

Almost immediately, he feels his phone vibrate from where it’s still clutched in his slightly sweaty palm. He fumbles to check the response.

 **(15:40)** _Hi._

_Is she…really into me?! Oh man. This is nuts._

**(15:40)** i hope u dont think im a total loser 4 txting u already hahaaa

He stares down at the screen in anticipation, fingers drumming on the surface of his desk. Surely Chie’s not going to respond again, not so quickly at least. He’s pretty sure she’s with her friend, that Amagi girl, the one who’d rejected him practically the moment he’d opened his mouth to talk to her. Talk about awkward. Still, he has Chie’s number. And that’s great, even if she’s not quite the delicate beauty that Amagi is. She has those great legs, after all.

The phone buzzes.

 **(15:42)** _Uh, no. Actually, I kind of have no idea who this is, so I can’t really call you a loser. Wrong number?_

Yosuke freezes. There’s no need for him to jump to conclusions. There’s several things that could be going on here, after all.

  1.        Chie’s playing around! Hilarious, really.
  2.        She accidentally told him the wrong number. Like, mixed up a couple of digits. Not unusual.
  3.        _He_ stuffed up entering her number into his phone. Like the idiot he is.
  4.        Or she told him the wrong number as a prank. Also _super_ hilarious, really.



But Yosuke’s not going to lie to himself. Looking back, Chie’s smile, which he’d thought had been so coy, was really more of a _smirk_ , wasn’t it? And Amagi had perked up a little when Chie had recited the number. Like, perhaps, it was a totally unfamiliar number and she’d been about to say something about it.

 _Ugh, of course_. Yosuke lays his arms down and rests his chin on them, hunching over the desk. Still, the unknown person he’s texted deserves an answer. With a lot less enthusiasm, he types out his response.

 **(15:46)** im rly sorry! i think this girl gave me the wrong number, so i texted u instead!! sooorry how lame rite? haha

Hoping it sounds apologetic enough, Yosuke slips the phone into his bag, figuring that’s the end of that. He needs to head to work anyway. After messing around like that after the last bell went, he’s probably going to be late.

It’s during his break at work – and he’s lucky to get one after coming in late – that he checks his phone again and realises that the random person he texted has messaged him back. With interest, he checks the message.

 **(15:50)** _Don’t worry, I don’t mind at all. It’s kind of nice getting a surprise message. Sounds like there’s a story behind you getting the wrong number, though…?_

Yosuke gapes at the screen. It sort of seems like this mystery person is interested in talking to him, but…surely that must be wrong? Or maybe it’s that because this person has never met Yosuke face-to-face that they’re continuing the conversation. After all, he seems to repel most other humans lately just by existing. Whatever it is, he’s sort of glad.

 **(17:02)** soz i took so long to txt back. had 2 go 2 work, its my break now!! hah nt rly a story with the girl. think she was playing a trick on me. ill ask her 2mro

He hits send. Seconds later, he hears, “Hanamura-kun, quit messing around on that phone! Your break’s over, so get back out there!”

“Yes, yes,” he mumbles obediently, shoving the phone back into his pocket and sighing as he reties the string of his apron. It’s as he’s stacking canned tuna that he feels the phone go off again in his pocket, just nudging at his leg, and smiles to himself.

The moment he gets off work, he’s got his phone out of his pocket. It took a _lot_ of self-restraint not to check it earlier, since there’s other employees around all the time to look at him with their judgey eyes and think about how he’s the manager’s son and that his dyed hair is trashy and all the other crap that goes on in their brains.

It’s in the short walk from the back door of Junes to the bike rack that he reads the message that the stranger has sent him.

 **(17:05)** _Work, huh? Sounds like I’m talking to a pretty responsible guy. I assume you’re a guy anyway if you’re talking about getting rejected by this girl. Which, by the way, sorry if she’s playing a prank on you. That’s sort of rude._

It’s a surprisingly long response – longer than Yosuke would ever expect of a response in a text. He wonders if it took the other person a long time to type out, since they seem so precise and careful with their words.

 **(18:34)** u got it all wrong haha im rly not responsible or nything. just workin at the place my dad runs. nd yea im a dude, but nah it wasnt rly rude. ive only known her for like a week so shudve expected it tbh. very funny rite?

It strikes Yosuke that this is probably the longest conversation he’s ever had via text. Is it sad, that this stranger seems more eager to talk to him than the friends he left in the city? Those friends have only been giving him one-word responses to all the news he shares with them about how lame Inaba is and how much he misses them and his old school. Somehow, getting a ‘ _that sux’_ in response feels pretty insufficient.

Not that he’ll ever say anything about it. That’s just how most guys are when they’re texting, right?

Well, that must mean that the person Yosuke’s texting must be a girl. His lips curve up in a thoughtful smile and he tries to imagine her as he gets on his bike, ignoring its ominous creaking. Someone cute and empathetic. She’s probably quiet – and smart, judging by the way she writes all her words out fully. If only she were here in Inaba, now that he has her number and all. She’s probably just his type.

He feels the phone go off in his pocket again and is incredibly tempted to stop just to check it, but he tides himself over by continuing to imagine the girl. Long hair – and braided, probably. Two braids, one either side of her head, but loose braids. Tied with ribbons. Slight, with large, dark eyes and delicate hands. She probably has a great body under the baggy school sweater she’s always wearing.

 _I should ask her about herself_ , he thinks. But wait – no. He can’t do that. She’s already established that he’s a boy, and he even confirmed it. If he goes and tries to ask her more about herself, she’ll probably get the wrong impression – well, _sort_ of the wrong impression, anyway. She’ll decide he’s a creep and never reply ever again. It’s not like he has any other way to talk to her, so he needs to be careful. He nods to himself.

He reads her reply later on, when he’s home and resting on his bed, headphones blaring music.

 **(18:42)** _I think I’d like to work. Way better than having to study all the time. And sounds like you have a pretty low opinion of yourself…_

Yosuke thinks his reply over a little before sending it.

 **(19:58)** u got strict parents? studying sux tho i agree, that sounds tough. low opinion? nah im just used to ppl treating me like shit. thats just how ppl r

He wonders if it’s a little too honest – but he’s been totally honest with her so far. He sort of feels like since this is his one opportunity to be honest about himself and have someone else listen, he should take it. After all, it gets pretty tiring having to smile all the time in this boring-ass town, at his boring-ass school and at boring-ass Junes, where every day is most assuredly not _great_.

Then she replies. She’s really quick. He sort of wonders if she has anything at all interesting in her life, if she’s so keen to talk to a stranger like this.

 **(20:00)** _Not really that strict. They just have high expectations. They’re not even home most of the time, so I don’t know why I try so hard. Habit, maybe. And hey, don’t stand for people treating you like shit. That’s just sad. That doesn’t have to be how people are._

Yosuke still doesn’t really know anything about this girl, he knows that. But the more they converse, the more he feels connected to her. Perhaps it’s superficial. But the music playing right now is soft, the melody meandering with the plucking of a guitar, and it sparks a certain tenderness inside him.

 **(20:02)** maybe ur right. idk wat else 2 do tho other than just smile u know? i only jst moved here so no1 rly likes me as is. and i got advice 4 u 2: dont try hard for things unless its 4 u. sounds like u need it

Is he being presumptuous? Oversharing?

Somehow, it doesn’t matter to him. The song ends, replaced by something a little more upbeat. He taps his foot to the beat.

 **(20:03)** _Thanks. You seem like a pretty nice guy, even if you’re a total stranger. From what I know, I like you. So don’t worry._

 **(20:05)** thx rite back!! ur 2 nice. :)))

Yosuke tries to think of more to add, but he realises with a pang that there’s not too much more to say, not without him changing the subject. He could ask her about herself – totally creepy, and not even he’s willing to come off like that after the girl’s been so kind to him. He could talk more about himself – but then again, that’s basically all they’ve been doing. He could… bring up some current event? He racks his brain and comes up with nothing. Serves him right for not keeping up with anything important, ever.

So he just sends the text as it is. For the rest of the night, the phone lies still and silent on the bed beside him. Disappointment curling somewhere in his gut, he rolls over and lets his music lull him to sleep.

He thinks: _that’s that_. _It was nice while it lasted._

* * *

In the city, another boy’s lying on a couch that’s far too small for him, his legs hanging over the end and his feet dangling. Piles of paper lie abandoned on a nearby desk. He’s holding on to a phone, fingers curled tight around it, and wondering what exactly he’s doing or if it means anything at all.


	2. Chapter 2

**October**

“So, you gave me the wrong number!” Yosuke says with a chuckle, rubbing the back of his head.

“Oh, yeah. _That_.” Chie places a hand on her hip and grins. “Should teach you not to be totally creepy, huh? You can’t just ask girls for their numbers like that.”

Yosuke just shakes his head at her, maintaining an air of nonchalance. “Whatever. I don’t need your number anyway.”

“Oh?”

“Nope. I ended up texting a totally cute girl instead of you! A real bonus, really,” Yosuke says smugly.

“A _cute_ _girl_. Yeah, right. Nice try, Hanamura,” Chie says with a giggle – no, a cackle. Chie totally cackles and Yosuke totally doesn’t need her number at all. Even if the mystery girl never texted him back last night.

It’s during homeroom, the teacher droning something that’s totally irrelevant to Yosuke’s life as far as he’s concerned, that he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. No… it can’t be, surely. He surreptitiously eases it out onto his lap and, careful to keep it obscured under the desk, checks the text.

 **(08:33)** _Homeroom’s boring. Help._

Yosuke almost lets out a delighted laugh. This isn’t over, after all.

 **(08:33)** u can say that again

 **(08:33)** _Homeroom’s boring. Help._

He can’t help snorting at that, and takes a quick, frantic look around to check that no one’s noticed. Thankfully, it seems like he’s safe. The teacher’s reading something off a page and everyone's either paying attention or half-asleep.

 **(08:34)** do u think ur funny?

 **(08:34)** _Of course!_

 **(08:34)** ur rly not

 **(08:34)** _That’s pretty mean. :(_

Yosuke doesn’t know how the simple use of a smilie from a total stranger can be so cute to him. He decides not to think too hard about it.

 **(08:35)** so ur in high school 2 huh?

Surely that’s not too invasive. The girl was the first one to text him, after all.

 **(08:35)** _Yeah. First year._

 **(08:35)** same!! join any clubs?

 **(08:36)** _No, too busy going home and studying by myself. Life’s a party._

 **(08:36)** sorry bt i ttly outparty u stacking boxes at work and nt being in any clubs either

 **(08:37)** _Damn. Invite me sometime._

 _Would be nice if I could,_ Yosuke thinks, staring at the phone wistfully. It’s then that he becomes aware of the teacher, who actually happens to be standing not by the board like before, but right in front of Yosuke’s desk. He gulps and raises his eyes.

“Hanamura-kun. You _are_ aware of the no-cellphone policy here at Yasogami High?” the teacher says. Yosuke’s faintly notices of a pair of girls whispering off to his left.

“Ah… yes.”

“Then you won’t mind me taking that for the rest of the day?”

Yosuke silently hands the phone over, hoping he doesn’t look too resentful about it. The teacher just nods at him and heads back to the front of the room. Yosuke watches despairingly as that precious line of communication to his mystery girl gets tucked into a drawer and out of sight.

* * *

Yosuke tries and fails to get his phone back before the end of the day. Finally, when the final bell rings, he practically flies out of his seat to the front of the classroom and pleads for the phone. Haughtily, the teacher hands it over. He spends the next five minutes reading the texts that have accumulated in slight horror.

The first three are from the wrong number stranger.

 **(08:39)** _You still there?_

 **(08:42)** _Guess not, huh._

 **(08:45)** _Well, text me later if you’re bored enough, I suppose._

 _Oh god oh god, I haven’t ruined everything, have I?_ Yosuke thinks, sending a covert glare at his teacher, who doesn’t notice at all.

The next couple of texts are from his dad. The first informs him that he’s wanted for an after-school shift at Junes. The next lets him know how disrespectful it is of Yosuke not to send a reply of confirmation, and that his dad is aware that Yosuke spends basically his entire life playing around on that phone of his and there’s no possible excuse for him _not_ to reply. _Thanks, dad_ , he thinks, rolling his eyes.

But as ticked off as his dad _definitely_ is, there’s something more important he needs to attend to first.

 **(15:40)** omg im so so so so sorry

 **(15:40)** had my phone taken off me in homeroom. wasnt careful enough. now dad mad cause i ‘ignored his txts’ or smth

 **(15:40)** shiiiiiiiiit he wants me to work today

All he can do now is wait for a reply. Grabbing his bag, he makes his way down to the front of the school, hops onto his bike and heads for work. A few minutes into the journey, as he’s cycling along the road above the riverbank, he feels the phone vibrate in his pocket. He stops the bike and glances off to the side. Oddly enough, there’s only a single fisherman there. The weather’s pretty good too – there’s usually at least some students hanging out on the slope down to the river.

He digs the phone out of his pocket.

 **(15:55)** _Oh wow… I should be the one saying sorry. I was the one who texted you during school after all._

 **(15:56)** nooooooo dont b sorry. it made me pretty happy

 **(15:56)** …u can text me anytime u know

 **(15:58)** shit is that creepy? sorry

 **(15:59)** _Don’t say sorry so much. It’s not creepy at all. Actually, it’s sort of reassuring. Most people might think me weird for continuing this little thing I have with a wrong number after all. Good to know you’re okay with it._

Yosuke’s well aware that he’s only going to make his dad even madder if he delays getting over to Junes any longer. Even so, he decides to lay down by the riverbank, placing his bike flat on the ground next to him. It’s rare that so few people are around, so he kind of wants to use the opportunity to chill out, not go to work where absolutely everything stresses him out. Funny that he’s enjoying being alone like this when he’s so pathetically desperate for friendship.

Well, he’s not _exactly_ alone. He’s still talking to the stranger. It’s only been a day and he’s already having a hard time using her as a fantasy. He feels like she’s more than just some silly daydream – more than that, while being exactly that. It doesn’t matter what she looks like. He’s stopped trying to define that already. He can dream of her friendship without needing to define her, right?

He smiles down at the phone. It’s funny, but he’s kind of starting to imagine that she _is_ the phone.

 **(16:03)** im glad 2. watever this is, i like it. so. u cud text me all the time and id probably b happy.

 **(16:05)** _Even about the most trivial things?_

 **(16:06)** well yea ofc

 **(16:07)** _Okay. I’m eating chips. My mum will probably kill me when she sees the crumbs. I might vacuum._

 **(16:07)** dude wud ur mum rly kill u 4 eating chips

 **(16:08)** _If you could see my house, you would understand._

 **(16:08)** arent homes meant 4 eating food in tho

 **(16:08)** _It’s not really the sort of house you would call home, I suppose._

First, the parents that are never really around… now the house that’s not really a home? Yosuke worries at his lip. How does he respond to that kind of stuff? He can’t really think of anything adequate.

 **(16:10)** do u tell any1 else this stuff

It hardly feels like the _right_ response, but he’d probably make a fool out of himself trying to be sympathetic, or whatever.

 **(16:10)** _No. Just you. Funny how it’s easiest to say whatever I want with someone I barely know anything about._

 **(16:10)** but its nice??

 **(16:12)** _Of course. I said that, didn’t I? I can tell you anything and at the same time I can easily just delete this thread and never speak to you again. It’s a really interesting connection because it’s sort of a connection that doesn’t know it exists._

 **(16:14)** wat

Well, that’s what Yosuke considers sending, anyway. He decides that it sounds far too dumb, even for him, and tries again.

 **(16:14)** do u talk this much irl?

 **(16:14)** _Haha, no. Not at all. No one thinks I have much to say. I don’t mind it._

 **(16:14)** and wud u rly delete this thread and never think abt me ever again?

 **(16:15)** _Doubt it. But who knows._

 **(16:16)** _…I have your number saved._

Yosuke has no words to describe how glad he is that the stranger sent a second text. How was he supposed to respond to the first? _Oh, haha, it’s so cute that you may or may not just stop texting back at any moment!_ _Not._

 **(16:16)** as wat???

 **(16:17)** _Wrong Number._

 **(16:19)** gr8888.

 **(16:19)** _Anything you’d prefer? (also, how is that supposed to be pronounced? Great-ate-ate-ate-ate?)_

 **(16:20)** nah thats ok. ill save urs now. u can b stranger danger (and its just greeeeaaat but watever floats ur boat)

 **(16:21)** _I’m honoured. That’s a great-ate-ate-ate name._

Yosuke snorts loudly. The fisherman he’s sharing the riverbank with starts and almost loses his grip on the pole.

 **(16:21)** _Hey, didn’t you say your parents want you to work?_

 **(16:22)** HAHAHAHA. yea im sort of late. mite go now byeeee

He’s only an hour late. After some hasty explanations about confiscated phones and an implied _‘I really didn’t want to move away from the city, you know, Dad,_ ’ he gets away with it just fine. He figures that he won’t be getting such soft treatment for much longer, though. Apparenly sixteen is quite old enough to be able to adjust to new places and new people in the span of a few weeks. Apparently sixteen is quite old enough for his father to say stuff like, ‘You’re a man now, so _act_ like one’ while still talking to him as if he’s got the mental age of a ten year old.

Well, at least Stranger gets it. Probably.

* * *

The next day, he texts Stranger during homeroom again.

 **(08:35)** homeroom’s still boring as hell buuut its sorta fun bein all sneaky

To his left, he hears a whispered, “Does Hanamura-kun think he’s too cool to talk to anyone but his old friends in the city?”

 _No_ , Yosuke thinks glumly, tapping the phone against his leg while he waits for a reply. _I’ve become quite aware that I’m not cool enough for anyone at all._

* * *

In the city, another boy’s half-listening to the teacher talking about all the opportunities there are available at their very wonderful and prestigious school. “Take advantage of these opportunities, or I assure you, you’ll regret it.”

“Seta-kun, got any plans for the weekend?” the boy at the neighbouring desk whispers.

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. His phone vibrates against his thigh and the corners of his lips turn up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i must say, i'm astounded by the positive response to this silly little fic! a million thanks to everyone who's shown support so far!
> 
> next chapter will be a little different. it'll be a mini, in between sort of chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

**05/11/2010**

**(16:14)** _Oh my god._

 **(16:15)** ??

 **(16:17)**  [ _Attached to the message is a picture of a kitten staring piteously up at the camera, mouth open in a meow. It’s orange with a white patch over its eye and a single white sock. It has very fluffy fur._ ]

 **(16:17)** that is a cat

 **(16:17)** _It’s not just a cat._

 **(16:18)** ??????

 **(16:22)** _Don’t give me that! Don’t you see the look in its eyes? The silky texture of the fur?_

 **(16:23)** i rly dont get ur point. r u tryin 2 tell me its secretly a demon from hell

 **(16:27)** _What?! No!_

 **(16:27)** _I’ve never seen anything more beautiful_

 **(16:27)** _I could stay here all day. Just stroking it. So cute_

 **(16:28)** …

 **(16:28)** rightyho

 **(16:29)** wait is this y u keep taking so long 2 respond?? ur stroking it?

 **(16:32)** _Yes_.

 **(16:33)** geez ur mad

 **(16:33)** ill bet ur whispering sweet nothings in its ear. u freak

* * *

**(18:01)** u never did respond. pls dont tell me ur still there now

 **(18:03)**  [ _Attached to the message is a picture. There are now two kittens and an older cat gathered in the photo._ ]

 **(18:04)** o god ive got a real weirdo on my hands. wow

 **(18:05)** do u not have anything better 2 do???

 **(18:07)** _Cats are always worth it._

* * *

**06/11/2010**

**(15:45)** just saw a cat stalking a bird, how do u feel now

 **(15:46)** _It’s a natural instinct._

 **(15:46)** yea but not a cute one

 **(15:47)** _Cats look very beautiful and graceful mid-hunt._

 **(15:47)** rite…

 **(15:48)** _I bet YOU can’t hunt a bird with your bare hands._

 **(15:49)** well no but thats not rly a hobby im keen 2 take up

 **(15:50)** _You’ve been defeated. By cats. You can leave the room now._

 **(15:51)** !! geez. y do i ACTUALLY feel ashamed?

* * *

 

**06/11/2010**

**(19:03)** _I think I’m improving._

 **(19:05)** well hello there. how r u? yes im good thx ur very kind 2 ask

 **(19:06)** …improving at WAT?

 **(19:07)**  [ _Attached is a picture. It’s a hot pot. There looks to be a huge mixture of ingredients inside. Even to someone with no knowledge of hot pots, it looks delicious._ ]

 **(19:08)** that ur dinner? luks good

 **(19:09)** _I know! Cooking’s my secret talent._

 **(19:09)** ur feeling boastful all of a sudden! the presentation mite be gud but wat it if actually tastes like butts?

 **(19:10)** _Enlighten me – what do butts taste like?_

 **(19:10)** o come on. its a FIGURE OF SPEECH

 **(19:11)** _This is perfect though. I was pretty cold and now I can gorge myself on this!_

 **(19:12)** dont u have a heating system or sumthing in ur nice house?

 **(19:12)** _It’s broken. And my parents are on a business trip, so they don’t know yet._

 **(19:13)** o

 **(19:13)** funny story actually. so wen we moved here we had no heating for a good long while. it wasnt that bad until we had a SUPER foggy day

 **(19:14)** so i was like im gonna go out for a run. get warm and get fit (also there is literally nothing 2 do in this town)

 **(19:14)** but it was so foggy i ran straight into a streetlamp

 **(19:15)** _I don’t know whether to thank you or not for sharing that._

 **(19:16)** i thought it mite make u laugh!!

 **(19:18)** _Then thank you. :)_

* * *

 

**08/11/2010**

**(18:46)** so i just got off work. and im about 2 leave. but this lady is glaring at me. help??

 **(18:46)** txting u as a way to avoid eye contact

 **(18:47)** no but srsly:  
[Attached is a photo. A woman standing a fair distance away is indeed glaring in the direction of the camera]

 **(18:47)** _Isn’t taking photos of strangers without permission illegal?_

 **(18:48)** _But yes, you’re right. She’s got a mean look on her face. What did you do this time?_

 **(18:48)** hey y do u automatically assume i did sumthing? i rly didnt

 **(18:48)** o she turned around. shes leaving

 **(18:49)** wat the hell did she want from me????

 **(18:49)** _She had a bad day._

 **(18:49)** o?

 **(18:53)** _Yes. Actually, today she found out that her parents have abandoned her to live among a pack of dogs. She’s having a hard time adjusting and hasn’t got any experience with the language. Anyone would be upset by the situation._

 **(18:54)** ok so sumtimes i think ur super normal and boring. but then u pull shit like this.

 **(18:55)** _:)_

 **(18:55)** dont u smiley face me

 **(18:55)** actually i think there’s a 75% chance she was offended by my bike. its yellow and falling apart.

 **(18:56)** _Well, it’s probably not the nicest colour, but?_

 **(18:57)** i dont think u understand. i have had this bike 4 many years and it dusnt hav much life left in it

 **(18:57)** literal death trap

 **(18:58)** _And you’re about to ride that thing home?_

 **(18:59)** _RIP._

 **(19:00)** b quiet. im off now. bye

* * *

 

**11/11/2010**

**(16:03)** U HAV GOTTA B SHITTING ME

 **(16:04)** _????_

 **(16:05)** IM JUST HERE WAITING 4 A TRAIN. ALL INNOCENT

 **(16:06)** THAT DAMN WOMAN HU GLARED AT ME IS LYK 3 METRES AWAY WTF

 **(16:06)** she hasnt seen me tho. i think im gud

 **(16:07)** _How do you know she hasn’t seen you? She’s actually stalking you. She's being subtle on purpose._

 **(16:07)** o rly

 **(16:08)** _Indeed. See, she works for this association who save people who don’t like cats from their life of hell._

 **(16:09)** i thought she was livin with dogs???

 **(16:09)** also wen did i ever say i dont like cats?

 **(16:10)** _At the very least, you don’t like them enough. And that’s why she’s there. She’ll seduce you into a glorious life of cat-petting._

 **(16:10)** SEDUCE?

 **(16:11)** well shes not 2 bad luking. but a bit old 4 me.

 **(16:12)** _Perhaps I should have clarified. She’ll seduce you with pictures of kittens._

 **(16:13)** DID U WORD THAT BADLY ON PURPOSE

 **(16:13)** h8 u

 **(16:14)** hang on a sec was that wat u were doin the other day? sending me kitten fotos?

 **(16:14)** r u sayin that this is ur master plan… 2 seduce me??

 **(16:15)** _Mrrow._

 **(16:16)** ?????????

 **(16:20)** screw u. i’m going to play games on my fone instead of talkin 2 u. goodbye

 **(16:21)** _*waves tail mysteriously*_

 **(16:22)** BYE

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks again for all the support, especially those of you who've taken the time to comment or send me a message on tumblr. you make my day!
> 
> i'll be alternating between full chapters and mini-chapters for the next little while, just as a note.


	4. Chapter 4

**December**

**(19:59)** hey do u hav an instant messaging account?

Yosuke’s thinking: with the amount that he and Stranger text about the most inane things, it’s probably easier if they just talk over the internet, at least while they’re both at home. More convenient for his phone bill, anyway. It’s been over a month since he first got the wrong number, and not much has changed for him other than the fact that he knows way too many random things about the day-to-day life of a total stranger. He still hasn’t actually confirmed if they’re a girl, but he feels like it’s a little too late to ask now.

 **(20:01)** _No. I can make one if you want?_

 **(20:01)** yea u shud!! ;)

And so he loads up the old chat client he used to use until he realised no one was actually interested in talking to him.

 **(20:04)** ok im online. add me wen ur done: crayzeefrog

 **(20:05)** … _Why?_

 **(20:05)** wat

 **(20:06)** _…Why ‘crayzeefrog’?_

 **(20:06)** o come on. leave me alone ive had this acct 4 many years ok

 **(20:07)** _I’ll take your word for it._

There’s a little blip as a notification pops up.

_NARUKAMI179 HAS SENT A FRIEND REQUEST_

He clicks his approval and moments later, a chat window pops up. Yosuke’s icon is of a guitar, but Stranger hasn’t uploaded one, it seems.

 **crayzeefrog** : yo narukami179. that ur name? narukami-san?

He watches the flashing text saying ‘ _narukami179 is typing…’_ with great interest.

 **Narukami179** : Haha, no. It’s just a random name I generated because I couldn’t think of anything. Better than crayzeefrog anyway.

 **crayzeefrog** : so rude

 **Narukami179** : I forgot to tell you! I met a cat on the way home and it was so great.

 **crayzeefrog** : every cat u meet is great apparently. im just waiting 4 u 2 meet one u hate.

 **Narukami179** : Impossible.

 **Narukami179** : It was so cute. And it was really shy at first, but it let me pet it once I fed it some leftovers from my lunch. I was so happy. Maybe I’m a cat whisperer.

 **crayzeefrog** : this wud b fascinating if i hadnt heard it 200 times already

 **Narukami179** : That’s a total exaggeration!

 **crayzeefrog** : r u running out of gud stories 2 tell me

 **crayzeefrog** : i dont mind if u admit ur life is boring u no

 **Narukami179** : Well, you know it is. I’ve only met up with people from school once since the second term started.

 **Narukami179** : I just study all the time. I’m surprised you still respond to me.

Yosuke feels a sudden surge of guilt. Sometimes he says things as a joke and Stranger takes it totally seriously and he isn’t sure how to respond. Yosuke always wants to say something sympathetic but he’s also really bad, horrible even, at expressing himself, so he usually just makes a joke.

Which is exactly what he’s going to do now.

 **crayzeefrog** : u dont study all the time. u talk 2 me 2 ;)

 **Narukami179** : Is that really any better than studying?

 **crayzeefrog** : its hard 4 me 2 know if ur being sarcastic u no

 **Narukami179** : I’ll let you keep wondering forever, then. :)

 **crayzeefrog** : ruuude. very rude

 **crayzeefrog** : anyway i dont hang out with anyone ever. unless u count work. pretty sure no1 there actually likes me anyway

 **crayzeefrog** : im the managers son so the only times ppl r ever nice 2 me r wen they want some favour

 **Narukami179** : Are you sure about that?

 **crayzeefrog** : positive.

 **Narukami179** : Sorry. That’s awful.

 **crayzeefrog** : yeah, well. this town mostly is. and u know i cant make any friends bc my dad happens 2 manage this big company that mite put loads of local shops out of business

 **crayzeefrog** : i transferred midyear so every1 already knows every1

 **crayzeefrog** : its a struggle just making ppl talk 2 me!!

But wait – it’s not fair for Yosuke to complain about his situation and not even let Stranger talk about his. Why does he keep doing crap like this? Why does Stranger even bother talking to him?

 **crayzeefrog** : ahhhh but dw i will persevere. pls ignore my complaining

 **Narukami179** : Good luck! Wish I could give you advice. I transfer schools so often I just sort of stopped making an effort to know people, so I can’t help at all.

And speaking of how they're constantly transferring - Yosuke has to wonder if Stranger resents their parents for it. It’s hard knowing for certain with only a few texts mentioning anything about said parents – Stranger tends to stick to sending pictures of cats, talking about the food they’re making (which definitely lends to the theory they’re a girl, Yosuke thinks) and complaining about studying.

Anyway, he makes a guess.

 **crayzeefrog** : ur parents move around a lot 4 their work?

 **Narukami179** : Yeah, you got it. Actually, they’re going overseas in five or so months. I’m moving to my uncle’s for the next school year.

 **crayzeefrog** : woah rly

 **crayzeefrog** : …

 **crayzeefrog** : a WHOLE year wow

 **Narukami179** : It’s fine. I’ll just handle it like I always do.

 **crayzeefrog** : well, if u say so…

Personally, Yosuke can’t imagine it – he was forced into moving to Inaba with his family, after all. Is Stranger’s kind of lifestyle normal? He doesn’t think so.

 **crayzeefrog** : anyway lets stop talking about all our problems. also lets stop talking bout cats

 **Narukami179** : We can keep talking about cats. I don’t mind.

 **crayzeefrog** : how about… no?

 **crayzeefrog** : nyways like i was gonna say. u into any music??

 **Narukami179** : Um… not really? There’s nothing wrong with music. I never listen to it though.

 **crayzeefrog** : :O BLASPHEMY

 **crayzeefrog** : do u want me to rec u some stuff

But wait… _oh god._ What if Stranger hates Yosuke’s tastes? Sure, his old friends liked some of the same stuff as him, but Stranger’s nothing like them. He quickly rushes to correct himself.

 **crayzeefrog** : i mean only if u rly want. it dusnt rly matter. my taste is probably kinda dumb lol

 **Narukami179** : Sure. :) Whatever you recommend, I'll probably enjoy!

Well, now he _has_ to. Yosuke presses a couple of fingers to his forehead, already feeling immensely pressured, and digs his MP3 player out of his pocket.

 **crayzeefrog** : OOOOOOKKK ill look thru my stuff and tell u wat u shud listen 2

 **crayzeefrog** : well wen i can b bothered. but ill start thinking

 **crayzeefrog** : wat DO u like anyway?? i mean apart from studying

 **Narukami179** : That’s kind of a weird question.

 **crayzeefrog** : well EXCUSE ME for having a natural interest in another human

 **crayzeefrog** : unless ur not human. omg

 **Narukami179** : You caught me.

 **Narukami179** : But in all seriousness? I like reading.

Yosuke lets out a disbelieving laugh. It’s like Stranger’s hobbies are all the things Yosuke _doesn’t_ do.

 **crayzeefrog** : of COURSE u do. man i shoulda known. u like 2 cook, u like cats and u like 2 read.

 **Narukami179** : And you like to listen to music, have a piece of trash for a bike and…on second thought, what on earth are your hobbies?

 **crayzeefrog** : u got me. i do nothing but eat work sleep and watch tv. o and go to school but like i dont even do that properly

 **Narukami179** : What do you mean?

 **crayzeefrog** : u no how theres tests coming up

 **crayzeefrog** : yea well

 **crayzeefrog** : im pretending theres not

 **Narukami179** : Wrono…you should probably study even if you don’t want to. It’s important.

 **crayzeefrog** : wait wait hold up

 **crayzeefrog** : wats this WRONO business

 **Narukami179** : Oh. Well, since I saved you as ‘Wrong Number’ in my contacts it’s sort of how I think of you.

 _Wrono_ , really? Yosuke tells himself he should hate it. He should _not_ be getting butterflies over a stranger giving him a crappy nickname.

But he is. _Ugh. Things are getting out of hand._

 **crayzeefrog** : wow

 **Narukami179** : I could call you frog?

 **crayzeefrog** : such a great alternative. my parents clearly made a mistake not calling me frog. or wrono

 **Narukami179** : I know, right. Anyway, since you so kindly reminded me about the upcoming tests, I’m actually going to get back to my favourite after-school hobby of torturing my brain.

 **crayzeefrog** : i thought u liked studying??

 **Narukami179** : I like it just as much as you. Meaning… I really don’t. I just have better self-control.

 **crayzeefrog** : u r assuming things about me. wat if the reason i dont study is cos i am actually a natural genius

 **Narukami179** : …

 **crayzeefrog** : u dont believe me do u

 **Narukami179** : …

 **crayzeefrog** : well, u r ttly rite not 2 believe me!! but fine. u go study ur pretty lil butt off and maybe i will 2 if ur lucky

 **Narukami179** : Thank you.

 **crayzeefrog** : 4 wat

 **Narukami179** : The compliment.

 **crayzeefrog** : huh

 **Narukami179** : My pretty butt.

 **crayzeefrog** : ohhhh ffs

_crayzeefrog has signed out._

**Narukami179** : Aw, why’d you leave? You weren’t even the one who said you were leaving. :(

“Because I’m laughing too hard at your stupid humour, you idiot,” Yosuke mutters at the screen before shutting the computer down. He has some song choices to make.

* * *

The tests come and go – Yosuke does a little below average as always. Not so awful that his parents call him out on it, but badly enough that they keep sending him these tiny frowns. He’s sprawled in the armchair right now, half his attention on the TV and the other half waiting for the familiar vibrating of the phone against his thigh. It’s as the presenter reports the latest political scandal that Yosuke notices his mother appraising him over the top of the newspaper. He wants to roll his eyes but instead goes to text Stranger.

 **(20:21)** r u watching the news

 **(20:23)** _I didn’t know you had an interest in current events._

 **(20:23)** u no im not interested in anything. anyway r u?

 **(20:24)** _I’m not, actually. I don’t really watch TV._

 **(20:24)** do u read newspapers instead

 **(20:26)** _I don’t really keep up. It’s a poor habit. My parents usually take the newspaper into their room anyway._

And there go Yosuke’s hopes of impressing Stranger by actually doing something intellectual for once. He snorts.

But there might be something else he can do. Maybe. He’s finally finished choosing songs for Stranger. He had a tough time thinking of what they might like at first – after all, he doesn’t _personally_ know them and they don’t listen to music much anyway. In the end, he settled for a mixture of the nicest instrumental songs from his favourite game soundtracks and artists with slow, languid tracks. He feels like that’s the sort of thing Stranger would like. That way they can listen to music while studying, right?

 **(20:27)** ooh btw can u go online?? i found some tunes u mite like mayb

 **(20:28)** _Sure_

Yosuke stands up, stretching with his phone still in his hand. He sees his mother glance surreptitiously at him as he leaves the room, the news still going behind him.

By the time he logs in, he sees that Stranger is already online.

 **crayzeefrog** : u were quick!!

 **Narukami179** : I was already online researching.

c **rayzeefrog** : will u ever cease to b boring

 **Narukami179** : Haha, no.

 **crayzeefrog** : WELL ANYWAY

 **crayzeefrog** : im gonna send u a link to a lil playlist thing i made

 **crayzeefrog** : i hope u like

Yosuke pulls up the link to the download and copies and pastes it into the chat. He watches as the text “ _Narukami179 is typing…_ ” flashes up, disappears, then reappears again in quick succession. It’s nearly a minute before the reply comes.

 **Narukami179** : You really did it?

 **crayzeefrog** : well yea i said i wud didnt i

 **Narukami179** : I suppose you did

 **Narukami179** : I’m just not exactly used to people doing things for me.

Suddenly, Yosuke wonders if he should have put a little more thought into his song choices. Were they perfect? He’s not sure anymore.

 **crayzeefrog** : omg it was no big deal honest

 **Narukami179** : Still…

 **Narukami179** : I’ll go listen to that now, then.

 **Narukami179** : Bye :)

 **crayzeefrog** : pls u dont need to get all sappy like that

 **Narukami179** : Am I making you blush?

As if Yosuke’s going to admit _that_.

 **crayzeefrog** : argh

 **crayzeefrog** : stop

 **Narukami179** : You are!

 **Narukami179** : Too cute, Wrono. Too cute.

 **crayzeefrog** : >:(

 **Narukami179** : I’m going to do some cooking. And play your music. I’ll text you pics, so I’m going offline now. Bye!

 **crayzeefrog** : bye u big jerk

_Narukami179 is offline._

**crayzeefrog** : jerkkkkk

But Yosuke is smiling, one hand covering his mouth as if concealing a secret. He goes to his futon and sits cross-legged against the wall, tipping his head back. There’s plenty of homework he really should be getting through, but he just closes his eyes and pulls his headphones up.

His phone buzzes about twenty minutes later. Stranger’s sent him an image of curry – it looks good enough that Yosuke’s suddenly hungry again, even though he’s already eaten dinner. Stranger always eats pretty late - apparently because their parents are always so late home. But according to Stranger, they've got the house to themselves tonight.

 **(21:15)** _The music is very good. I think it made the curry taste really good too. ;)_

 **(21:15)** glad 2 hear!!!

 **(21:16)** _Wish I could send you something in return. Like this curry. That could get awkward though._

 **(21:17)** omg as gud as it luks i dont want 2 find curry in the mailbox thx

 **(21:17)** _I typed up some maths notes. Maybe I could send you those, since you adore maths so much._

 **(21:18)** actually id ttly accept those im in dire need

 **(21:18)** _You sure aren’t playing hard to get :P_

 **(21:19)** omg stop

 **(21:20)** _If I gave you a ring made of cardboard would you accept my hand in marriage?_

“Stop that,” Yosuke whispers to the phone, as if Stranger can hear him. “Don’t say stuff like that.”

 **(21:20)** things r moving 2 quickly 4 me

 **(21:20)** _Haha you’re still cute_

 **(21:21)** stoooooooop

 **(21:22)** _But seriously. I really did like the songs. It’s like you somehow knew what my taste is even though I don’t even know what my taste is_

Yosuke huffs a sigh of relief. Maybe he can be more daring the next time he makes Stranger a playlist. Because there’ll be a next time – he knows it.

 **(21:23)** well i guess i am pretty gud wen it comes to music

 **(21:23)** my only talent tho im useless otherwise

 **(21:24)** _Don’t say that. Even if you’re joking. I think you’re wonderful_

Yosuke stares at the screen. He’s not sure if he can respond. Is it reasonable for his heart to be quickening like this?

 **(21:24)** _I wish I knew you in real life. I don’t connect well with others but I feel like I could with you._

 **(21:26)** um giv me a sec

 **(21:26)** _Sure_

 **(21:28)** sorry if that sounded like i was uncomfortable or sumthing

 **(21:28)** i guess im just overwhelmed??? i wish the same thing like idk ive never rly had a best friend or anything but u cud b

 **(21:29)** _You’re genuinely the best friend I have right now._

 **(21:29)** o geez. yea

 **(21:30)** i feel like i shud b more upset that my best friend is some1 ive never met but

 **(21:30)** _Well I’m quite happy with it so you can feel free to be too._

The trouble is, Yosuke _is_ happy. He’s too happy. He slowly starts on a text, his heart racing just at the thought of sending it.

 **(21:31)** thing is tho… i sumhow also hav a crush on u. maybe. like dont even ask idk how that works

Or, that’s what Yosuke types out. He stares at the words for a long moment, before sighing heavily and deleting it all. He can’t send that. He doesn’t understand it himself. He’s not even sure he knows what he’s feeling.

Stranger could be anyone. He can’t just…

But he does. He gets a stupid little fluttering sensation in his stomach every time his mobile vibrates, even if it turns out to be his dad texting him his hours. He’s delighted by the trivial photos Stranger sends of cats, and food, and pristinely organised study notes. Honestly, he gets all _blushy_ after a tiny bit of teasing!

Yosuke knows it’s dumb. Knows it might be because no one else ever pays him any genuine attention, other than to frown at him and whisper behind his back because he’s the  _Junes_ kid.

Finally, he sends:

 **(21:32)** u do make me happy

* * *

In the city, another boy’s alone at a large wooden table, the rich smell of curry wafting up from the plate set in front of him and the soft melody of a song drifting from the stereo. He’s heard this one song about ten times in a row – it’s the only romantic song in the playlist and after the first time it played, he set it on repeat. In his right hand he holds a spoon, poised above the plate. In his left is his phone.

He’s smiling down at it, eyes crinkling at the corners.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i heard crazy frog the other day, actually. i thought of jiraiya and knew it was fate.
> 
> (also sorry if you prefer the name yu narukami, i've read far too much fic where his name's souji to ever get behind it)


	5. Chapter 5

**14/12/2010**

**(21:28)** do u ever just luk at the mirror. luk at urself. and lyk think… that person is me. i am a human. i EXIST. and then u feel lyk ur staring at urself from outside??? I CANT EVEN EXPLAIN IT BUT WTF

 **(21:29)** _Are you okay there?_

 **(21:30)** _I know what you mean, though. It’s deeply unsettling. It happens quite often when I see my reflection, since we have barely any mirrors in my house. I see myself and go, ‘oh – is that me?’_

 **(21:31)** never rly happens 2 me unless im lyk tired or smth

 **(21:32)** thats y i txted u anyway. just gotta calm my brain down

 **(21:32)** its lyk this whole time im seeing every1 else and im lyk yea theyre all ppl. but the moment i try to think of myself as a person the way i do every1 else its lyk NOPE

 **(21:36)** _Yes. Like trying to turn your point of view inside out. And then feeling cast out of yourself._

 **(21:37)** U GET ME 100%

 **(21:38)** im so glad i can talk 2 u :)

 **(21:39)** im a little concerned it happens a lot 2 u tho?

 **(21:40)** _Oh, don’t worry. It’s not a crippling sort of fear, it’s just…discomforting._

 **(21:41)** u not gud with taking selfies then?

 **(21:42)** _Selfies?_

 **(21:42)** r u a dinosaur????

 **(21:42)** theyre just like taking photos of urself

 **(21:42)** every1 does it or so i thought

 **(21:43)** _I don’t mind photos of myself, if that’s what you’re saying._

 **(21:43)** ahh nvm

 **(21:50)** _You’ve got me thinking. I think my reflection scares me sometimes because I don’t really have a sense of self. Like, I was thinking about it the other night. I’ve built up this idea of you in my mind, yet I can’t seem to construct an idea of myself._

 **(21:50)** do u need 2? is it normal 4 ppl 2 luk at themselves like that?

 **(21:51)** _I don’t know. Perhaps it would be better._

 **(21:53)** let me tell u then: ur dead smart, super analytical, rly hardworking. ur core is 100% cat dork tho.

 **(21:55)** _Well… thanks._

* * *

**15/12/2010**

**(01:02)** ok i cant sleep

 **(01:02)** sorry. i dont want 2 wake u up. i shud hav thought that 1 thru…

 **(01:03)** i was thinking about our conversation earlier tonite

 **(01:04)** and like… yea its scary tryin 2 properly luk at urself. but do u also find it terrifying when u try to like… broaden ur perspective? like u think about the size of ur town. ur country. this world. the galaxy and the universe

 **(01:07)** but then i think about how even tho im so tiny in this universe, everything inside me is so complicated. my body and my mind down 2 the smallest atoms

 **(01:10)** and then all the decisions u make and all the things around u that decide ur fate, all the infinite possibilities that cud hav existed 2 u at every single second of ur life. BUT IT’S NOT JUST ME. OH NO. EVERY1 AND EVERYTHING CUD HAV HAD A DIFFERENT PATH IN LIFE

 **(01:12)** wtf my brain hurts

 **(01:14)** _Are these the thoughts you have instead of doing homework?_

 **(01:15)** o ur awake. did i wake u up?

 **(01:16)** and maybe. is that a gud excuse? sir, the vastness of the world made me realise homework is meaningless?

 **(01:18)** _I was actually asleep, yes, but you’re just so interesting, Wrono._

 **(01:20)** ah sorry sorry shud probly not hav txted u. but i blame u 4 makin my brain go crazy and me not bein able 2 sleep

 **(01:21)** _I accept all blame. You’re free to text me anytime, you know._

 **(01:22)** argh speaking of school. either im getting dumber or i just hav no motivation. did shit in the recent tests. i swear my dads talking 2 me slower like ive regressed 2 bein a 3 yr old

 **(01:22)** im not smart. but i never did THIS badly

 **(01:23)** _That doesn’t sound like fun. :( It sounded to me like you just didn’t study, though?_

 **(01:24)** nah. not rly. idk every time i thought about studying i freaked out about wat every1 will think wen they post the scores and i do badly even tho i tried 2 study

 **(01:25)** dusnt make sense. that worrying about being a sucky loser stopped me from actually trying. u wud think it wud inspire me

 **(01:26)** _Perhaps you were trying to convince yourself you don’t care what happens?_

 **(01:26)** ugh who even nos

 **(01:30)** _Speaking of fate and infinite possibilities, though, imagine if that girl you hit on had made up a number with just a single digit difference. Just imagine._

 **(01:30)** i will not. i do not want 2 imagine that thx.

 **(01:31)** _:)_

* * *

**15/12/2010**

**(12:35)** _Can I ask you a weird question? Cause I’ve been thinking about something since this morning at school._

 **(12:36)** sure!! im on the roof with my lunch so im quite ready 4 a txting session

 **(12:36)** _Good, okay._

 **(12:38)** _So I usually just spend lunch in my classroom, plug some earbuds in and get some study or work done while I eat. Everyone’s used to it and they’re quite happy interacting amongst each other and leaving me to myself._

 **(12:39)** _Right now I haven’t got the earbuds in. I’m listening to some gossip from a group of girls who sit behind me. One of the girls just left, and the others immediately just began to talk about her. Not in a particularly rude way, but not in the nicest either._

 **(12:40)** _I’m kind of wondering, why do we try to make friends? Why do we ever do anything for anyone else? Is it ever genuine, or are we just doing it for our own sakes, to look good, to not be an outcast in our little school hierarchy?_

 **(12:42)** _Ever since I started texting you I’ve been wondering what the exact meaning of making connections with people is. It’s not like I’ve NEVER had a friend, but I’m only now having these thoughts._

 **(12:43)** u… really like to overthink things huh? i get ur angle tho. and i kind of agree in a way. but perhaps not quite in the way u mean. hear me out

 **(12:44)** even tho im not close with any of my old friends anymore it was still always fun hangin out nd stuff. maybe we make friends 4 our own sakes and 2 make ourselves feel gud but wen we do that we cant help but make the other person happy. well usually

 **(12:45)** idk tho. just my opinion. cos the way u put it u made it sound like makin friends is just a burden. like a survival tactic for animals. which is not tru. not always tru. idk. tbh u mite b rite. cud b y i hav no friends, no1 sees the advantage of it. but thats sorta pessimistic

 **(12:46)** _Thank you. You can say some pretty clever stuff sometimes, Wrono. I’ll have to think about that. And hey, what’s this about no friends? We’re friends._

 **(12:46)** thank u

 **(12:46)** WAIT, SUMTIMES CLEVER???

 **(12:46)** very rude

 **(12:47)** _Heh_

* * *

**25/12/2010**

**(00:00)** MERRY XMAS STRANGER DANGER

 **(00:01)** _Ah, yes. I’d forgotten that that’s my full name._

 **(00:01)** _Also, a very merry Christmas to you, Wrong “crayzeefrog” Number._

 **(00:02)** u hush now, narukami-san

 **(00:02)** _I’m beginning to regret the random username generator._

 **(00:03)** and im beginning 2 regret my music tastes as a kid but we cant change the past, stranger

 **(00:03)** _What a pitiable world we live in._

* * *

**25/12/2010**

**(12:15)** _Check out this chicken!_ [ _Attached to the message is a photo of a huge roast chicken on a plate in the middle of a beautifully set table._ ]

 **(12:16)** holy bananas. u cooked??

 **(12:16)** _Yes, I did. My parents say they’d like to try it now. I’ll text you later._

 **(12:17)** super jelly of ur parents. i think im temporarily goin 2 becum ur parents and eat the chicken myself. just u wait!!!

* * *

**25/12/2010**

**(14:03)** _Did you manage that whole becoming my parents thing?_

 **(14:04)** sadly no. but mum also made a roast chicken. MMMM bye

 **(14:05)** _Enjoy!_

* * *

**31/12/2010**

**(23:02)** so its almost the new year

 **(23:02)** _It seems you’re correct. Is there a reason you’re interrupting whatever New Year’s festivities I’m sure you’re enjoying to contact your beloved Stranger?_

 **(23:03)** dont go assuming ur beloved

 **(23:04)** wat r u goin 2 wish 4?

 **(23:05)** _I hadn’t thought about it. The generic things, I suppose. You?_

 **(23:06)** luck i think. i mean if u wish 4 gud grades or gud health or money, u no wat ur getting rite?

 **(23:06)** if i wish for luck, anything cud happen

 **(23:07)** _Well then – I wish you luck in your wish. :P_

 **(23:09)** u shud wish 4 a grand year full of adventures and intrigue!! spice up ur life

 **(23:10)** _Perhaps I will._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sort of incorporated my thought that it terrifies souji that he's the only one that never faces his shadow. sort of.


	6. Chapter 6

**January**

It’s hard to believe that it’s already a new year. Christmas and New Years – in which Yosuke spent most of his time texting Stranger the excruciatingly boring details of his little family gathering and Stranger sent pictures of cake and chicken – went by rapidly. He’s resolved that this year he’s actually going to have a friend other than Stranger, though. Maybe.

For now, he’s on the roof, eating his lunch. It’s the only place he knows he can safely have his phone out without some teacher harassing him about it. And, as he’s been doing pretty much every day since the new year, he’s reading the text that Stranger sent him exactly at midnight.

 **(00:00)** _Happy New Year Wrono! I hope this year is wonderful for you. Thanks for everything!_

It’s not even the kindest thing Stranger’s ever sent to him, but the thought that _he_ was on Stranger’s mind as the clocks struck midnight, that his first thought this year was to send _Yosuke_ a text… it gets to him every time he reads it. Yosuke can’t deny it – he’s far gone for Stranger, damn it all.

Since then, they haven’t texted too much – Stranger’s been busy with one thing or another, and Yosuke’s been given so much work over the Christmas season he just wants to collapse. Still, Stranger _should_ be available to chat right around now.

 **(12:20)** yo!! on the roof. very bored help

Yet the rest of lunch passes by without the tell-tale buzz of the phone. Yosuke swallows every bite of the bread he brought – from Junes, of course – and shakes his head. It’s fine. Stranger’s got stuff to do.

He heads back to class a tad early, since he’s got nothing better to do. But as he’s going down the stairs he happens to knock shoulders with another person. Startled, he garbles out, “Oh! Sorry!”

It’s a third year guy that he’s bumped into – and he’s glaring. Just Yosuke’s luck.

“Hanamura…?”

“Yeah, uh… that’s me?” Yosuke scratches the back of his head and tries a smile.

“Figures that you would be a careless prat,” the guy snorts, and moves as if to leave.

“E-excuse me?”

The other guy crosses his arms. He’s a whole lot taller than Yosuke. Probably an athlete, judging by those broad shoulders. Yosuke swallows. Perhaps he should’ve just left it. After all, if this guy knows who he is, then…

“You and your Junes need to get the fuck out of Inaba,” he spits, fingers clenching. Yosuke takes a quick step back. “It’s your fault my family’s struggling. Your fault I had to quit basketball for my shitty part-time job. Fuck you.”

“That’s-“ Yosuke bleats. But what can he say? _Nah, bro. You’ve got it all wrong. See, every day’s GREAT at your Junes. Today we’ve got a special in the electronics department. Never mind the failing electronics store in the shopping district. That’s just the corporate world for you._

“Oh my god, I’m sorry!” Yosuke’s thoughts are interrupted by a girl who practically bounds down the stairs in a couple of leaps and latches onto the guy’s arm. “He’s being a jerk, isn’t he?” she says, pouting. “He’s been in such an awful mood lately.”

“Because of _him_!” the guy shouts.

Yosuke just stares, lips pressed together, eyebrows drawn. How is any of this his fault? It’s not like he’s the human embodiment of Junes.

“Hey, what’s going on here?”

Yosuke glances down to the base of the staircase and sees Chie and Yukiko standing there. Chie’s got her hands on her hips and is frowning suspiciously. Yosuke’s really not sure if he wants her to have appeared right now or not, but he’s glad that at least the third year guy’s not looking at him anymore.

“Ah, there’s no need to worry!” the third year girl says quickly, waving her arms around.

Chie appears unconvinced. “Are you alright, Yosuke-kun?” she asks, tilting her head and lifting an eyebrow. Yukiko shifts from foot to foot.

“Oh, is this Hanamura-kun?” The third year girl appraises him. Yosuke can’t tell if her expression is one of sympathy or of displeasure. Then she shakes her head. “Ah, we’d better get going to class. Please excuse us!” Then she bodily drags the guy away, ignoring his grumbled protests.

Yosuke sighs. At the same time, his phone buzzes in his pocket. He reaches for it like it’s a lifeline.

But it simply reads: _Don’t forget that you’re working tonight. 4-7pm._ It’s just his freaking dad. Maybe he really _is_ becoming Junes, what with all the time he’s spending there lately.

“What happened, Yosuke-kun?” Chie asks when he reaches the bottom of the stairs. “That guy looked furious.”

“It doesn’t really matter,” Yosuke says, shifting uncomfortably and looking at his shoes.

“Well, if you say so,” Chie says dubiously. She sweeps around and stalks off towards their classroom, looking no less on edge. Yukiko shrugs apologetically and goes to follow.

Maybe three months ago Yosuke would’ve rejoiced about Chie looking so worried on his behalf. But the cold weight of the phone in his hand reminds him of what's more important to him now. He’d better put it away – if a teacher comes by, they’ll confiscate it.

But then it vibrates. Again.

 **(12:58)** _Ah, sorry! I was talking to a teacher. Haven’t even eaten. Going to be so hungry until I get home…_

Yosuke bites down a smile.

 **(12:58)** thats ok! got 2 hang out with my best buddy aka guy hu randomly h8s me cos of dads company. beats u anyday

 **(12:59)** _Wait. Explain?_

 **(12:59)** no time gotta go 2 class. dont worry srsly

 **(13:00)** _Hey!!_

Yosuke stares at the screen. He didn’t think that Stranger would read so deeply into the message, didn’t even think to remind himself that Stranger would get worried. Because Stranger actually _cares_. Despite the fact that the third year guy had put him into an awful mood, he can’t help smiling.

 _It seriously doesn’t matter_ , Yosuke tells himself as he enters his class, nodding. _That third year knows nothing about me. It doesn’t matter. I have Stranger._

No one even spares a glance for him as he goes to his desk and takes a seat.

_Doesn’t matter though._

* * *

It’s really stupid of him. Really, really stupid.

So he’s just doing the usual thing at the foodcourt, helping out here and there. That’s when he does the really stupid thing.

He trips and sends a tray of half-eaten food into a customer’s face.

Perhaps it would’ve been okay if he’d just quickly apologised and offered some free food, or something. But instead he freezes and stares at the woman in horror as her shock quickly transforms into outrage.

“How clumsy can you be, you idiot?” she snaps, looking down to examine the damage to her shirt. It’s pretty bad, thick brown sauce staining the white cotton. “What are you going to do now, then?”

“I’m sorry!” Yosuke blurts, bowing deeply and inwardly cursing that this woman’s not the more forgiving sort.

“Hanamura-kun, what have you done now?” That’s one of the newer workers – the Konishi girl – rushing over, eyes wide.

“I’m really sorry!”

“Well, I should hope so,” the woman says, clearly still affronted.

“Come on, ma’am, I’ll take you to get cleaned up,” Konishi says, a gentle hand on the woman’s back as she guides her towards the women’s toilets.

But that’s not the end of it. Later on when he’s restacking a display that was knocked over by a couple of rowdy kids, his dad takes him aside.

“Yosuke, I heard about what you did earlier,” he says, that stern look on his face that Yosuke can’t stand. He ducks his head and tries not to pout like a five year old. “You handled it very poorly.”

“I’m sorry,” Yosuke says, because what else can he say? He’s been saying it all day. He may as well keep it up.

“Yes, well, you have no excuse for being so distracted. This is your workplace. I can’t allow you to slack off _here_.”

 _Here? What’s that supposed to mean?_ Yosuke closes his eyes. “I’ll try not to make any stupid mistakes again.”

“I should hope not.” His dad sighs deeply. “I’m working late again tonight. You’ll be biking home.”

“Okay,” Yosuke says, not even bothering to watch as his dad turns and leaves. Mum won’t be happy. Sometimes he wonders if she hates Junes just as much as all the families struggling in the shopping district.

But surely none of them hate it as much as he does. Suddenly, the tune playing over the intercom system, the harsh white lights, the smell of fresh produce – it’s all making him sick, his stomach roiling. He checks the time on his phone. 6:45 PM. His shift ends in fifteen minutes – he won’t be missed.

He runs outside, straight to his bike, and goes home.

* * *

After politely declining to join his mum for dinner and collapsing on his futon, a dull weariness comes over Yosuke.

It’s been _three months_. Three months and he hasn’t accomplished anything in Inaba. Hasn’t made a friend – there’s only a few people who even bother to talk to him at school. Hasn’t done anything but slave away at Junes, ignore his homework, listen to music, idly browse the internet… sure, he’s wasting life away. But what else is there for him to do, here in goddamn _Inaba_?

“You ought to take up a hobby,” his mum had urged him a few months back. “Start playing the guitar. Or take up a sport?”

“I can’t take up a sport,” Yosuke had grumbled in return. “The clubs aren’t accepting new members until second year starts.” Here, his mum had looked suitably guilty about having uprooted Yosuke from his school midyear. “And I can’t afford a guitar.”

“Ah well, perhaps we can have your father buy you one,” his mum had said reassuringly.

But of course, he’d said no to that. Said Yosuke would have to earn a thing like that himself. Which was basically how he’d landed the gig at Junes, anyway.

So Yosuke has nothing to do, no one to ease his boredom – well, except Stranger. But Stranger’s miles and miles away, and Yosuke will never _really_ know Stranger. It hits him then. He’s miserable, really miserable.  No amount of joking can hide it. He curls up on his side, burying his face in his pillow.

The phone buzzes.

 **(19:34)** _Reading the dumbest book ever right now. So why am I hooked? Why do I do these things to myself? I must admit, it makes me feel powerful, in a way._

Yosuke stares at the screen with bleary eyes. In the darkness of his room, it’s blinding. Slowly, he gets up and pads to the desk, turning the computer on and loading up the chat client. Predictably, Narukami179 isn’t online. Since they’re reading, and all.

 **crayzeefrog** : its probably easier when youre not online anyway

 **crayzeefrog** : i know you wanted to know about what happened earlier. at lunch

 **crayzeefrog** : i tried to convince myself i didnt care. but god im so freaking sick of everything?

 **crayzeefrog** : this is kind of embarrassing but you’re the only one i can vent to and maybe itll help idk

 **crayzeefrog** : i had the shittiest day. got harassed on the stairs for my dad’s company. the one that’s putting everyone in town out of business. like wtf do they think im the mascot or something?? its not like i dance through the halls singing about it. i hate the place as much as they do

 **crayzeefrog** : i just dont get it. why wont anyone give me a chance? is it cause i arrived midyear? arent transfer students meant to be exciting? i get that everyone hates the company but i didnt think EVERYONE would be so closeminded about it

 **crayzeefrog** : anyway as if that wasnt bad enough i screwed up at work today. got yelled at by a customer then my dad came along and chewed me out too

 **crayzeefrog** : ever since we moved i dont feel like i can get along with him too well. cause hes always all about work. ugh but maybe im thinking too deeply into it

 **crayzeefrog** : like ok none of what happened was even that bad. i thought i could handle it all. but for some reason i suddenly started thinking about how meaningless my entire life is right now??

 **crayzeefrog** : its not like ive ever really mattered to anyone. i havent even bothered texting my friends in the city for a few months because its so obvious they don’t give a shit

 **crayzeefrog** : im bored all the time

 **crayzeefrog** : except when we talk of course

 **crayzeefrog** : i just want to feel a little more alive

 _Narukami179 is online_.

Yosuke starts and pulls away from the monitor abruptly. There’s a few minutes where absolutely nothing happens. Then:

 **Narukami179** : I thought something might be up.

 **Narukami179** : That’s awful. I mean, I already knew about the whole situation with your dad’s company, but to think you’ve been enduring stuff like this for months?

 **Narukami179** : I hate that I can’t do anything to help. I want more than anything to go to where you are and try to do something for you. You’re strong though, really.

 _I’m not,_ Yosuke thinks. But already, he’s beginning to feel a little better. A tiny warmth worms into his chest and nests there.

 **Narukami179** : I really care about you, you know. You listen to me even though I sometimes wonder if I’m the blandest person in existence. You make me feel like I’m worth something. So I think it’s only right for me to tell you that you’re worth so much to me. Maybe you feel that your life is meaningless right now, but I know that you have the strength to do something to change that mindset. Maybe not today, or tomorrow. But I’m always here to listen whenever you need it, alright?

 **Narukami179** : I hope I’m not coming off like a guidance counsellor. Oh god.

 **Narukami179** : I guess what I’m trying to say is I really care about you. And it makes me so sad that you’re sad.

 **Narukami179** : Are you there?

Yosuke buries his face in his hands. His eyes are stinging, his cheeks hot.

Why does Stranger have to be exactly that? A stranger? Why is the only person who seems to give a shit about him not really here?

Why has he fallen for someone so utterly inaccessible?

Because he knows it, he has. Perhaps it was Stranger’s desperately kind words that confirmed it, but it’s something that’s been building for a long time now. He’s head over heels for Stranger, doesn’t care who they are. Doesn’t care if they match his ideal image that he came up with back when he first texted them, doesn’t care if they’re actually five years older than him, doesn’t even care if-

The phone’s ringing. Not vibrating – ringing. Hesitantly, he reaches for it. ‘Stranger Danger’ flashes on the screen. He swallows.

“…H-hi?”

“Are you alright?” a completely unfamiliar voice demands from the phone. The quality is poor – always has been for calls on Yosuke’s mobile. But it’s unmistakable.

Yosuke was very wrong to ever speculate that Stranger might be a girl.

“You aren’t replying! Say something!” Despite the fact that Stranger is clearly worried, his voice remains even. He has a really reassuring voice, Yosuke thinks.

“Sorry. I’m really sorry. I’m just sort of overwhelmed. You said… some really nice stuff. I was kind of wondering what I did to deserve your words.”

There’s an odd chuckle from the other end. “Ah. Maybe I jumped to conclusions. You’re alright, then?”

“Well, yeah.” Yosuke twiddles with a loose thread on the pocket of his jeans and stares blankly ahead, not really seeing anything. He feels in a daze.

“But yeah, I meant all of it, you know. You’re a really special guy.”

 _A special guy. A guy. Just like you._ Yosuke scrubs at his face. “Argh, you’re making me all flustered. I don’t know how to deal with all these compliments.”

“Sorry. Am I making you uncomfortable?”

“Oh, no. Definitely not. You made me feel a lot better, actually. I’m sort of inspired now.”

There’s a soft sound from the other end. A sigh of relief, perhaps. Then silence.

“This is sort of weird,” Yosuke says.

“Yeah. I just noticed that.”

Silence again.

“It’s kind of eerie. Like all this time I’ve been seeing you as being inside my phone. But now I know you have a voice,” Stranger says contemplatively.

“Yeah, that’s _exactly_ it. Wow. Um. Should we go back to the chat?”

“Uh…” Stranger pauses. “Sure. I don’t actually have a plan on my phone for calls, so this is probably costing me a lot anyway.”

“Oh, true. Well um. Bye.”

“Bye.”

They both hang up. Yosuke swivels in his chair and returns to facing the monitor.

 **crayzeefrog** : thanks buddy!!

 **Narukami179** : Buddy? You’ve never called me that before.

Yosuke grimaces, feeling caught out. Probably because he wouldn’t really associate the word buddy with a girl.

But it’s the right word. He can’t have a crush on Stranger anymore. Not now that he knows that he’s a guy. That’s just not right…right?

* * *

In the city, another boy’s splayed out on his futon, laptop beside him and his mobile clutched in his right hand. He’s taking deep, even breaths. Despite this, his heart is still racing.

The chat client dings.

“I hope you’re really okay,” he whispers, tightening his grip on the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh man, it was tough getting this one up by today but i'll be somewhat busy over the next few days, so here you go.


	7. Chapter 7

**10/01/2011**

**(12:28)** _So, another tale courtesy of your eavesdropping Stranger._

 **(12:29)** do i need 2 put my thinking cap on??

 **(12:30)** _If you like._

 **(12:32)** _Those girls are just talking about some show they both watch. And they’re talking about the characters like they understand them and their decisions intimately. Predicting what’ll happen next with the utmost confidence. Picking up signs that seem ludicrously tiny._

 **(12:33)** _I’m imagining – what if our lives were some TV show to someone else out there in the universe. What if it’s all scripted, but there are fans watching us and hoping for certain things to happen?_

 **(12:34)** _You’d have to admit that this is a pretty interesting plot, aside from my constant studying._

 **(12:35)** AND I HAV 2 ADMIT U R FREAKIN ME OUT A BIT

 **(12:36)** wat do u think the fans wud b sayin then??

 **(12:37)** _They would want us to meet eventually, of course. They’re waiting for us to strike up a romance. ;)_

 **(12:40)** OUR TV SHOW IS NOT A ROMCOM

 **(12:40)** _Oh? I thought it fit. What do you think, then?_

 **(12:41)** i think it wud b…idk!! this isnt actually on tv y am i thinking so hard about it

 **(12:41)** _Humour me!_

 **(12:42)** fine fine fine. giv me a sec

 **(12:43)** it is a plain old COMEDY. cos im hilarious. the end

 **(12:44)** _Frankly Wrono, you have disappointed me._

 **(12:45)** wtf fine hav it ur way. its a romcom. wat next??

 **(12:49)** _Well, like you pointed out, this isn’t a TV show. There is no ‘what next’, is there? We continue along our individual little paths, we’ll text each other, the future will happen. In an ideal world, I’d get to meet the person who’s changed my way of thinking so profoundly, but that would be quite the miracle in a country with a population of over 120 million._

 **(12:50)** …how do u say things like that and not feel embarrassed

 **(12:51)** _Because I’m being sincere. Are you blushing?_

 **(12:52)** i was about 2 say sumthing sappy and then u said that so screw u 4 ruining the moment. not blushing thx!!

 **(12:53)** _Okay, I’ll pretend you’re not blushing. Go ahead and say it._

 **(12:56)** its nothing rly. just…

 **(12:57)** same. 2 wat u said

 **(12:58)** _Well, I appreciate it._

* * *

**11/01/2011**

**(18:33)** news! 4 u! u mite find it interesting

 **(18:34)** _Do tell!_

 **(18:35)** a new girl started at work recently and 4 a lil while i thought she wud just be the usual sort whos just there 4 the $$ and ignores me cos im trash

 **(18:35)** but weve been stationed in the foodcourt together LOTS recently and we started talkin

 **(18:37)** shes just genuinely so nice. im so happy theres some1 willin 2 actually giv me a chance.

 **(18:38)** sure shes kinda givin me the lil bro treatment (shes my senpai) but at least she still likes me!

 **(18:39)** well not LIKES me but. u no. is friendly 2 me. sees me as a human

 **(18:44)** yo u still there?

 **(18:45)** _That’s nice Wrono. You AREN’T trash though, if you needed me to remind you._

 **(18:46)** got u and the senpai 2 tell me that sort of stuff now. things r lukin up :)

 **(18:49)** _So… you like her?_

 **(18:49)** like her? or LIKE her?

 **(18:50)** _The latter, I suppose._

 **(18:50)** we’ll see. shes rly pretty. i hear she has a bf tho? not 2 sure

 **(18:53)** _I see._

 **(18:53)** idk if i cud deal with having a gf tho. id freak out over EVERYTHING

 **(18:54)** like ok this is ttly me just thinking ahead way 2 far. but the thought of goin off and living with some1 else is SO SCARY? lyk u no getting married and shit

 **(18:54)** im a giant idiot. any1 wud get angry havin 2 share space with me

 **(18:55)** _Why??_

 **(18:56)** all the stupid little things. i cant seem to keep my shit organised, i can never sit still (sharing a bed with me wud b a nitemare) and i say stupid crap all the time without thinking

 **(18:58)** _I don’t really see the problem. It’s not like any of those traits are exclusive to you._

 **(18:58)** so ur sayin im not special?? thx

 **(18:59)** _Well, I’m just saying all the things you listed aren’t uncommon. None of those would stop me spending time with you, if we knew each other in real life._

 **(18:59)** ah but uve had the privilege of NOT knowing me irl all this time

 **(19:00)** u can say that but believe me i am SO annoying

 **(19:03)** _Well, whatever. I suppose I’m a bearable sort of person to live with if you take my cooking and tidying abilities into account, but I’m not the most interesting._

 **(19:04)** you: i think im boring. o but here r all my redeeming qualities!! trust me stranger u probs luk lyk a saint next 2 me

 **(19:06)** _I’d rather live with someone I find interesting and engaging than a boring guy with no life who just so happens to be a convenient sort of person._

 **(19:07)** this just turned depressing huh

 **(19:07)** well if it helps any id much rather live with u than another guy like me

 **(19:08)** _It’s a thing of science that opposites attract, after all._

 **(19:08)** u dont need 2 put it THAT way

 **(19:09)** _?_

 **(19:10)** nvm

* * *

**15/01/2011**

**(15:30)** its kinda weird. u havnt said nything bout cats for AGES. worried bout u

 **(15:31)** _What brings this on?_

 **(15:31)** _FYI, I don’t see many cats out and about in my area. I can take a trip to a pet store or google cats online if you’re missing it, though._

 **(15:32)** _I thought you were sick of hearing about cats, actually._

 **(15:32)** omg u dont need 2 try 2 spice it up 4 my sake and u RLY dont need 2 go out of ur way just cos i mention cats once

 **(15:32)** unless u rly want 2 go spend time just… lukin at cats (u weirdo)

 **(15:33)** _They’re very cute. Unfortunately, I’m very busy. I don’t think it’s in my best interests to be making trips to pet stores._

 **(15:34)** wat a pity

 **(15:35)** as 4 wat brought this on: i saw that lady at work 2day. u no the 1 hu was GLARING at me all the time in lyk november??

 **(15:35)** _It really does all make sense. I see she has succeeded in hypnotising you into a life where only cats are on your mind._

 **(15:36)** c it that way if u want u big dork

 **(15:37)** anyway i served her and i dont think she even recognised me?? but she dusnt seem lyk the usual type we get here in this town. my guess is she moved from the city

 **(15:37)** but ill never no the truth cos i lost my nerve b4 i cud say “hey hav i seen u sumwhere b4??”

 **(15:39)** _It’s not a mystery. I’m 95% certain of my theory that she’s a secret agent._

 **(15:39)** _I’m glad she didn’t glare at you this time, though._

 **(15:40)** me 2. she didnt exactly smile either tho. she just had that bored OMFG I WANT 2 GO HOME luk that u get wen uve been in charge of grocery shopping for lyk 20 yrs

 **(15:41)** _She’s that old?_

 **(15:43)** no but she had that exact luk of suffering

 **(15:45)** _Well, I’m almost sad she didn’t do anything more exciting. I was concocting a plan to save you from her terrifying glaring ways._

 **(15:45)** hey i was gud by myself! im not a damsel in distress

 **(15:46)** _No, but you can’t deny that you wanted to be saved the first time you met eyes with her._

 **(15:46)** well

 **(15:48)** ok i suppose i did text u 2 escape that glare

 **(15:48)** BUT U NEED 2 DO SUMTHING WAY MORE SUBSTANTIAL B4 U CAN CALL URSELF A HERO

 **(15:50)** _Obviously. Let me know the next time you meet someone vaguely disconcerting. I’ll prove myself. ;)_

 **(15:51)** k mr wannabe

 **(15:52)** _I’ll have you know, my name isn’t ‘wannabe’. It’s Danger. Stranger Danger. Much more edgy._

 **(15:53)** o god

 **(15:54)** i think ive been a bad influence on u and 4 this i am so sorry

 **(15:55)** _Haha. Quite possibly. I don't mind it, though._

* * *

**18/01/2011**

**(23:02)** _Are you still awake?_

 **(23:02)** not rly

 **(23:02)** _Yet you respond so immediately. I’m honoured._

 **(23:03)** wat u want

 **(23:03)** _Can’t sleep. I was reading an interview in a magazine my mum bought. Now I want to interview you. Despite all our texting, I don’t know some of the most basic things about you._

 **(23:04)** i c this is the point where u think im lulled into a false sense of security so u think u can get away with bein a lil creepy

 **(23:04)** but im a giant creep 2. so ok. u hav 2 tell me stuff bout urself in exchange

 **(23:04)** _Deal!_

 **(23:05)** _Favourite colour?_

 **(23:05)** THIS is the sort of thing u had in mind? well ok. um orange or red maybe. u?

 **(23:06)** _Any colour really. Perhaps black or white because I tend to be a little minimalist._

 **(23:07)** u sound like an interior decorator lol

 **(23:07)** _Star sign?_

 **(23:08)** didnt think ud b in2 that stuff. cancer

 **(23:08)** _Virgo. Hmm. Favourite animal?_

 **(23:09)** well i dont even need u 2 tell me urs haha. umm… bears maybe

 **(23:09)** _Are you tall?_

 **(23:10)** hey now ur about 2 cross a line there mate. average height? between 170-175cm but still growin

 **(23:10)** _I’m quite tall. 180cm._

 **(23:11)** then ur a bit taller than me, u happy? ill catch u up

 **(23:11)** _You can try. What are you scared of?_

 **(23:12)** um im not rly scared of the generic things. been desensitised by all the horror games my old friends were in2. ill go with… bein alone. i can handle most stuff as long as sum1s with me

 **(23:12)** _I thought you would say something silly, like spiders. Oh well. I’m worried I’ll never have much of importance to me in my life._

 **(23:12)** well

 **(23:13)** _Moving along. Your last dream?_

 **(23:14)** wtf do i rly need 2 share this? my LAST dream? i hav a lot of interesting dreams but ugh ok

 **(23:14)** the dream i had last nite, all i remember was that i was drowning and then i saw sumthin float past. it was a giant fuckin noodle. i was drowning in a sea of ramen

 **(23:15)** _Hahahaha wow_

 **(23:15)** _I would tell you my dreams, but I hardly ever remember them. All I remember are sensations and feelings, briefly. I remember running in my dream last night, though. Okay. Your best quality, in your own opinion?_

 **(23:16)** my immense music collection

 **(23:16)** _Really? I meant you, not your possessions._

 **(23:16)** next question dont wanna think about it rn

 **(23:17)** _Fine. But I won’t answer it either, then._ _Day or night?_

 **(23:17)** day i think

 **(23:18)** _Night. Interesting._

 **(23:18)** wat exactly r u gaining from all this

 **(23:18)** _I’m learning new things about you. Aspirations?_

 **(23:19)** ugh r u alternating between easy and hard?? a life where i am both content with my job and not struggling 2 b financially stable altho with my luck itll hav 2 b 1 or the other i bet

 **(23:20)** _Fair enough. My aspiration is to do something unexpected, as opposed to doing whatever my parents expect. Apples or oranges?_

 **(23:21)** oranges. gotta hav that citrus

 **(23:21)** _Nah, apples. Are you on good terms with your immediate family?_

 **(23:22)** im sure uve already gathered that from all weve talked these past few months…

 **(23:22)** _I want to see you put it clearly. I’m sure you’d like the same from me._

 **(23:23)** ah ur bribing me now. fine. dad treats me like im incompetent and he expects very little out of me but at the same time he expects me to do everything 4 myself. mum frets about me but isnt the type 2 say anything bout it. im not the type 2 say anything bout myself either so we seem 2 hav a lot of superficial convos l8ly

 **(23:24)** ur turn

 **(23:25)** _I’m sure it’s implicit that my parents don’t spend much time at home or with me. I have no problem in particular with them – they’re kind to me when they’re here and provide me with everything I need to live comfortably. I do all I can to keep them happy in return, which means keeping up my grades. It’s not bad, it’s just not the sort of family I read about in books and hear about at school._

 **(23:26)** i c. i thought u wud hav stronger words than that tbh

 **(23:26)** _I have nothing to complain about. If you met your old friends from the city today, what would you say?_

 **(23:27)** wait thats not sumthing u can answer in return

 **(23:27)** _Quite true. I’ll let you ask me a different question, to be fair._

 **(23:28)** fine. ok well soz but i dont rly hav an interesting answer. i guess id smile, say hi, ask wat theyve been up 2. all the usual small talk

 **(23:29)** _Even though they make no effort to stay in touch?_

 **(23:30)** i dont rly blame them

 **(23:30)** _Hmm alright. Do you want kids in the future?_

 **(23:31)** WAT

 **(23:31)** idk?!?! im 16 man cut me some slack!!

 **(23:31)** is it my turn yet?

 **(23:32)** _Alright, ask away._

 **(23:32)** hav u ever dated any1? or kissed any1?

 **(23:33)** _Haha wow. No to the dating. I was kissed once a few years ago, but it came as a surprise. She ran up to me on my last day and just kissed me, then ran away. I didn’t even know her name._

 **(23:33)** lol wow

 **(23:34)** _Am I allowed to ask the same?_

 **(23:35)** i dated a girl and we kissed once at the movies but it lasted all of 2 weeks b4 she broke up via txt haha

 **(23:36)** _Oh. That’s sort of awkward._

 **(23:37)** o well i rly dont care anymore. k i have 1 more. then im gonna sleep bcus my eyes keep shutting

 **(23:38)** _Oh sorry._

 **(23:39)** ur type. wats ur type. of girl

 **(23:45)** _I don’t have a type. Anyone who makes my heart beat a little faster, as cheesy as that may be._

 **(23:46)** _Are you asleep?_

 **(23:46)** _I did take a long time to answer, come to think of it._

 **(00:00)** _Sweet dreams. :)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for a so-called mini-chapter, i got really carried away with this one (it's longer than some of the full chapters!). anyway, here's hoping i survive to get the rest of the story written - persona 5 hype may just destroy me.


	8. Chapter 8

**February**

Yosuke thinks things are looking up. The school year’s almost over, so soon he’ll be in a new class. New class, new beginnings, right? He’s been in such a good mood that he’s been more diligent about work at Junes and a _little_ more on top of his schoolwork. On top of the fact that his motivation levels have been higher, Chie talks to him occasionally – he wouldn’t go so far as to say they’re friends, but she jokes around with him sometimes. Usually about their mutual hatred of schoolwork. So that’s nice.

Also, he thinks he might be getting over his dumb crush on Stranger. Maybe. They still text all the time of course – nothing’s really changed there. But Yosuke’s getting better at stifling the tingles of excitement every time the phone buzzes, reminding himself the Stranger’s actually a guy and he can’t have a crush on a guy because that would be gay. Yosuke’s not gay.

Actually, he thinks he likes the part-timer at Junes – Saki-senpai. She’s pretty nice to him these days. He’s happy whenever they get to talk. That’s a crush, surely.

 _And_ after saving up for months, Yosuke finally got to buy the guitar he’s had his eye on for a long time. It gives him a certain feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment every time he sees it propped up against the wall of his bedroom, because hey, he bought that guitar with his own money. _His_ sweat and tears went into getting it. He can’t afford lessons – not that there’s anyone in this stupid tiny town who’s offering guitar lessons. Still, he does alright teaching himself, strumming aimlessly and looking up video tutorials.

That’s what he’s doing tonight – playing the guitar. He’s actually finished all his homework, which is quite a miracle, so he can mess around totally guilt-free. Round about this time of night, he usually texts Stranger, but lately Stranger’s been taking longer and longer to reply. Yosuke doesn’t mind. It sounds like his workload at school’s been getting a lot more intense.

He’s in bed – almost asleep – when he hears the sound of the phone buzzing. He fumbles for it and brings it close to his face, trying to make out the words.

 **(23:22)** _I’m moving really soon. Everything’s going to be different. I wonder if I should take advantage of it._

 **(23:23)** wat u mean

 **(23:28)** _Well… Making friends with you like this really opened my eyes. I never really cared about having friends before but I get to go to this new school for a whole year, so maybe I’ll try this time. I’ve realised that other people are actually really interesting, you know? I want to know everyone, all kinds of people._

Yosuke reads the message a couple of times, squinting to make sure he’s getting it right. Stranger wants to know other people. _What’s that meant to mean?_ Yosuke thinks, trying to ignore the sinking sensation in his stomach.

Perhaps it’s because he’s basically on the verge of sleep that Yosuke sends what he does next.

 **(23:28)** o so wat ur saying is uve outgrown having a txting pal

He immediately regrets it, suddenly realising the harshness of his words. Sure, it’s hard to convey any sort of tone through a text, but _anyone_ would read that text and assume Yosuke’s trying to start an argument. He rubs a hand across his eyes, trying to wipe the sleep away.

 **(23:29)** _Hey, I never said that. Don't put words into my mouth...onto my phone?_

 **(23:30)** _But what we have isn’t tangible. I can tell you I’m rooting for you, but only through words. You can’t see my face or any of my sincerity. I guess that’s kind of what I want. Something tangible._

It’s probably not meant to offend Yosuke as much as it does. He stares intently at the screen – the harsh glare of it hurts his eyes – and grits his teeth. He kind of wants to just ignore this and go to sleep like he was about to do before Stranger started up this crap, but he’s not exactly sleepy. Not anymore.

 **(23:40)** well fine. im going to do the same in my 2nd yr. im already making friends with my senpai at work. nbd man we're still cool

 **(23:41)** _Wrono, I hope you realise I don’t mean that you’ll mean any less to me. Or that I think I’m growing out of this thing we have._

Yosuke’s head is far too fuzzy to deal with any of this. He groans, rolls onto his back and holds his phone above his face.

He hates it, getting this sort of shit from Stranger. But he should have expected it sooner, really. Yosuke’s noticed a certain quality about him, subtle but undeniable. Stranger reads too deeply into absolutely everything. He’s one of those overanalysing types who likes to question everything and come up with some sort of answer. It’s fine when Stranger wants to spout his random philosophical thoughts, but it’s not fine if it’s going to interfere with their friendship. All Yosuke wants is to keep on being friends with Stranger.

He tries to be careful with his next response:

 **(23:42)** perhaps u dont mean it bt its implied. wen u hav ur real tangible friends theyre goin 2 b more important. thats obvious

But reading it back after sending it, it comes off far snippier than intended. He groans to himself.

 **(23:43)** _It doesn’t mean we have to stop chatting._

Yosuke blinks at his phone.

 **(23:44)**  wat? so ur confirming wat i said in the last text then

 **(23:44)** nvm sorry i sound like a jealous brat i think im just a bit exhausted 2 think strait

 **(23:45)** _NO. Seriously. And don’t apologise._

 **(23:47)** _But think about it. I can’t promise you anything. How am I to predict that three months from now I’ll still want to keep this up? I said right at the very start, didn’t I? Our friendship is so interesting because of how fragile the connection between us is. I could delete my chat account, change my phone number… you’d have no way to contact me again. Or vice versa, of course._

 **(23:48)** _Alright, so it sounds pretty bad when I put it like that. It’s fragile, but I never want it broken._

That sort of gets Yosuke thinking. It’s not like that sort of thing is uncommon - friendships dying, especially with lack of contact. After all, whatever happened to all of his old friends in the city? He hasn’t heard a word from any of them in at least a month. But… none of those friendships _broke_.

 **(23:49)** connections dont hav 2 break. they can wear away slowly b4 u realise it

 _Wait,_ Yosuke thinks, _why exactly did I send him that?_

 **(23:49)** ok my attempt at being all philosophic like u was just depressing. never doin that again

 **(23:50)** _Well, you’re not exactly wrong._

 **(23:51)** _I won’t say that can’t happen. It would be an empty promise. No one can predict the future, right? But I can say that I want to keep texting you for a long time to come. It’s fun. And you’re a great friend._

 **(23:53)** well i know that even if i can delete any link to u i cant delete the impact being ur friend has had so i think even talking about it is dumb. im not going 2 just stop talking 2 u cos ur my friend. my best friend rite now. the end

 **(23:54)** _Oh. Perhaps you’re right._

 **(23:54)** _Sorry if I offended you._

 _Yeah, well_ , Yosuke thinks. _I’m probably too easily offended anyway. Gotta work on that._

 **(23:56)** dw. i am honestly dying to sleep rn so bye!

 **(23:57)** _Sleep well!_

* * *

Try as he might to put it out of his mind, that particular conversation with Stranger continues to lurk, unwelcome, in the back of his head. It colours all of their following interactions, Yosuke trying hard not to come off as excited whenever they text. It’d be super lame if he was all into it and then Stranger just deleted his number, after all. At the same time, he kind of wants to kick himself for giving the impression that he’s not interested in Stranger anymore. It’s really not like that.

It means he’s trying harder with Saki-senpai, though, instead of trying to sneak around work and text Stranger at any opportunity like he used to. She’s great, she really is. Maybe like a real-life _girl_ Stranger. He’s been thinking so ever since a certain day when a couple of other part-timers had gone by and sneered at him. _Sneered_. They hadn’t even tried to hide it.

“Ignore them, Hana-chan,” Saki-senpai had said airily. “You’re not your dad, and you don’t have to be defined by what your parents do. Just remember that.”

“Y-you think so?” Yosuke had said, tripping over his own words because it was _so_ hard being smooth around Saki-senpai.

“Mm.” She’d nodded with a cheerful, close-mouthed smile. “You keep doing your best, Hana-chan.”

Since then, he’s taken her advice to heart and has actually been putting in an effort at work rather than half-assing it. It makes Saki-senpai smile, makes his dad shut up about responsibilities and earns him money. It’s pretty good.

Whenever Yosuke tries to talk to Stranger about Saki-senpai, all he gets is some variation of ‘ _I’m glad to hear that you’ve found someone who accepts you._ ’

“I thought you already did, idiot,” Yosuke mumbles at his phone, but he never types it out.

He’s at work again today – he’s been doing most days after school lately. Saki-senpai’s often there, after all, and that’s always something to look forward to. Like right now, he can see her at the other end of the aisle with a tray of free samples, calling out to nearby customers. She’s told him before that it’s her least favourite job, so naturally he approaches her under the guise of stocking products right next to her.

“Yo, Saki-senpai,” he says, giving her his best attempt at a cheeky grin. She looks sideways at him, checks there are no customers paying attention, then shakes her head with a tiny smile.

“What’s up, Hana-chan? Doesn’t look like you’re actually _doing_ anything. I didn’t think it was your break yet.”

“We-ell, maybe not.” He goes and rearranges some canned fruit, just in case.

The rest of his shift passes in much the same way, exchanging light-hearted conversation with Saki-senpai. It’s amazing to watch her expressions flick between her saleswoman face and her resting face – she’s a pro. But after his shift ends, when he goes to grab his phone out of his pocket so that he can text his mum, he realises it’s not there. He panics for a moment until it occurs to him that he can’t even remember putting it in his pocket. A quick search confirms his suspicion – somehow he managed to leave it in the staffroom in his schoolbag.

“Oops,” he mutters to himself, fishing it out of his bag. It’s been forever since he’s put it in there. Usually he takes it _everywhere_ with him.

He doesn’t expect to see 15 new messages, but there they are. And they’re all from Stranger.

 **(18:55)** _Cooking dinner. Recipe includes sake. Kind of tempted to drink it, just for the hell of it?_

 **(18:57)** _I mean, my parents aren’t home. Never are lately, they’re sorting out the whole overseas gig. And one bottle won’t be missed. It’s only the cheap stuff we use for cooking._

 **(18:58)** _I’m going to do it. After I finish up with dinner, that is._

 **(19:20)** _Finished dinner. Gonna start the drinking thing now. I’m a real rebel, huh? ;)_

 **(19:21)** _Oh god. It’s disgusting. You should’ve stopped me._

 **(19:25)** _I’m not sure why I’m still trying to finish my glass. I’m not really enjoying it._

 **(19:26)** _No one’s even peer pressuring me or whatever, for crying out loud. Although… it’s not awful. It’s pretty strong, but I use it in a few recipes, so it’s sort of a familiar flavour in a way._

 **(19:27)** _Can one peer pressure themselves?? There’s probably a different word for it huh? Whatever the word is I think I’m doing that. To myself._

 **(19:40)** _I’ve actually drunk quite a lot. Watching TV. I don’t usually cause my parents like to watch it around this time of night_

 **(19:41)** _I study my butt off and everything because they want me to have some big fancy job just like them but uhhh I don’t know is that really what I want? Tell me what to do Wrono_

 **(19:45)** _Do I even know anything about myself? I just keep doing all the things I’m supposed to do like I’m a doll being marched around_

 **(19:50)** _Maybe you feel ignsinificant or meaningless or whatever but I’m just a hollow thing filled up with school and expectations_

 **(19:51)** _I don’t know why my parents won’t let me have a cat._

 **(19:55)** _I wish I hadn’t said all that stuff to you the other day_

 **(19:59)** _It’s been like an hour and you haven’t even responded to say you’re working or something. You don’t usually work this late anyway. Are you ignoring me? I’m sorry. I should have kept it all to myself. I don’t want to lose you. I think I’m lonely I’m not sure_                                                                 

It’s just after eight now – Stranger’s last text was only minutes ago. Feeling a little queasy, Yosuke taps out a response.

 **(20:05)** sorry i was working!! accidentally left phone in bag. u ok?

 **(20:06)** _Yes!! Hello Wrono! I am really good. TV is so much funnier right now. I’m not going to study tonight. Parents aren’t coming home anyway they won’t care_

 **(20:06)** haha o gud, i was worried for a sec. how much did u drink man?

 **(20:07)** _It’s funny how you call say stuff like dude and man and stuff ever since I called you that one time. Lol did you think I was a girl just cause I cook all the time?_

Yosuke can’t help but flush at that, irritated that Stranger’s called him out so plainly. Is he really that easy to read, even when Stranger can’t see his face?

 **(20:08)** honestly? i didnt no. u never told me

 **(20:09)** _See, the trouble with texting you is I really can’t tell if that’s meant to be in a resentful tone or not. If I could talk to you face to face I’d know how to respond to that by your facial expression but now I’m just sort of lost for wrods_

 **(20:10)** lost 4 wrods? friend, i think for a 15/16 yr old alone in the house, ur overdoing the whole experimental drinking thing. its kind of depressing

 **(20:11)** _I’m kind of a depressing person I guess_

Yosuke’s feelings of irritation evaporate instantly. What is he _doing_? Clearly, something’s up with Stranger – he never did strike Yosuke as the type to down a bottle of sake just for the sake of being random. And all that stuff he’d said earlier… Yosuke’d been too quick to dismiss it the second Stranger responded cheerfully.

He hadn’t realised it was possible to be this socially inept through texts. _It’s just like me to stuff even_ this _up, huh?_

 **(20:13)** no no no no wait i really did NOT mean that in a rude way omg that sounded awful i was only kidding

 **(20:13)** _It’s true though. Sorry to be like this I’m going to throw my phone across the room now and slap myself for being a bit idiot_

 **(20:14)** HEY do NOT do that

 **(20:15)** u did it didnt u?

 **(20:15)** i thought the nice thing about this was that we get 2 b honest? dont u dare freak out and try hide stuff from me if u want to say it all

 **(20:16)** i cant judge u. i dont no u

 **(20:20)** _And that’s been the problem all along._

Yosuke’s quite ready to slap _himself_ for being a big idiot. There’s Stranger, obviously worked up and maybe a bit upset (or a _lot_ upset) and Yosuke’s being an insensitive jerk about it. He wishes he could go to Stranger, drop to his knees and apologise a thousand times. But he can’t. He’ll have to make it up to him, somehow.

 **(20:21)** DONT SAY THAT EITHER OMG IM SAYING EVERYTHING ALL WRONG

 **(20:22)** ppl hav online friendships and shit all the time without getting so worked up abt the logistics. srsly pls calm down and stop overthinking, lets just enjoy ourselves

 **(20:23)** dont think u cant vent 2 me wen u need 2. im here 4 u just like u were 4 me

 **(20:24)** _Thanks._

 **(20:24)** shit ive been standing outside work 4 like 20 mins freezing my ass off. gotta get home. can text u l8r if u want?

 **(20:25)** _I think I might go to bed. Tired all of a sudden. Bye._

Yosuke frowns down at the phone, but he doesn’t really know what more he can do. He presses a hand to his forehead, sighs, and begins the arduous bike ride home.

* * *

In the city, another boy is slumped in an armchair, half-asleep. The TV’s chirruping away in the background. It’s just some reality show he left on. His mind is slow, but he’s quite aware enough to notice the phone vibrate. With halting movements, he brings it close enough to his face to read it.

 **(22:46)** i get ur probably sleeping or watever. i just wanted to say sorry for earlier. i think i was pretty insensitive. i feel awful that u feel watever uve been feeling all nite. and im sorry for being a jerk wen u said u wanted 2 make new friends. u deserve to hav many many amazing friends wholl love u and help u realise how gr8 u really r. ur so kind and quirky and smart and understanding and i think if u put a tiny bit of effort in any1 will think ur gr8. so. go get em tiger. yea.

The phone buzzes once more.

 **(22:47)** but pls dont forget i am here 4 u 2 tell anything 2. like we can gossip about the new friends we make. idk. Is that girly? anyway ill stop bothering u now

The boy, his hand shaking, lets go of the phone. It drops to the carpet with a muffled thud. He gradually falls asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'll admit that i could've posted this a bit earlier, but i was nervous about it. i JUST got my hands on persona q though (after a lot of waiting) so i figure i'd better get this up before i get entirely sucked in.


	9. Chapter 9

**05/02/2011**

**(21:25)** _I don’t know what to bring with me when I move._

 **(21:28)** uh well… ur clothes?

 **(21:29)** _Well yes, clothes is obvious. And I’ll bring all my stationery for school and my laptop and my phone (obviously). But there’ll already be furniture there, so I don’t need to bring any of my own. Other than that, I can’t see anything else to bring. Isn’t that sort of weird?_

 **(21:30)** dont u hav any books u want 2 bring? any…idk precious belongings?

 **(21:34)** _I don’t really have any books. My dad insists I just borrow books from the library, so as not to waste money._

 **(21:34)** woah. stingy. but u love reading

 **(21:35)** that wud b like if i wasnt allowed 2 buy any cds and cud only listen to stuff on the internet. or sumthing

 **(21:36)** wat about the rest of wat u own tho? unless all u hav is ur clothes, school stuff, laptop and phone??

 **(21:40)** _What’s your room like, Wrono?_

 **(21:41)** my room?? kinda messy y?

 **(21:43)** _Just tell me about all the stuff you own. I’m curious._

 **(21:43)** geez

 **(21:47)** well the best thing here is def my guitar. its beautiful!!!!! uh aside from that… my music collection. my posters. desk with computer and incomplete homework oops. the space for the tv my dad’s going to put in there (cos he’s buying a new one so i get the old one, woo!! can finally get back to playing games without family complaining about me being in the living room lol) my wardrobe with all my clothes and random shit i should probably throw out. pile of dirty clothes by the door. o and the couch im sitting on

 **(21:47)** its a pretty big room which is one nice thing about moving. i got a bigger room. woo. more space to be by myself!!

 **(21:51)** _It sounds like a nice room. Very you._

 **(21:51)** _I’ve been watching home renovation programmes. The bedrooms are always so nice, even before the renovations. Afterwards they’re sort of… well, they’re okay. They’re a little contrived. But I like seeing the bedrooms before, because they’re messy but there’s always so much stuff, you know? They reflect the people who live there._

 **(21:52)** i dont know if i follow?

 **(21:53)** _I have no decorations. Nothing to clutter up space._

 **(21:55)** _Well, perhaps it does reflect me. But I don’t know if I’m okay with it anymore._

 **(21:55)** _I want the walls to be a different colour._

 **(21:56)**  i mean if u prefer to keep things tidy and such thats fine. but how bout u do watever u want in ur new room?

 **(21:57)** _I don’t think my uncle would approve of me painting the walls._

 **(21:58)** i didnt mean that!

 **(22:00)** if u want to have stuff just accumulate it. buy little bits and bobs and put them on display. hell u ought to start buying some books so u can put them on a shelf!!

 **(22:01)** maybe that wud make u feel better anyway idk

 **(22:02)** anyway gonna do that homework. or tidy my room actually

 **(22:05)** _Tidying your room? Sounds like an absurd way to avoid your other responsibilities._

 **(22:06)** how bout u stop reading my mind?? bye

* * *

**10/02/2011**

**(20:45)** ok. so imagine ur lyk listening to the radio or sumthing

 **(20:46)** and a song comes on. and its lyrics are this:

 **(20:47)** like a crouching dragon / frozen in a kung fu battle / chained up on the sidelines / want to be the headline / look at me and break the shackles

 **(20:50)** well??? wat wud u think of that song?

 **(20:52)** _Why are you asking? Er… it doesn’t really sound like the sort of song I would care to listen to. Is it one of those nonsensical pop songs that get popular because they’re catchy?_

 **(20:53)** … i c

 **(20:55)** i had hoped u wudnt say that but now i understand.

 **(20:56)** I RLY AM SHIT AT RITING SONGS

 **(21:02)** _Wait… you wrote that?_

 **(21:03)** _Well, it’s not so bad. I see that the dragon has a profound desire to prove itself. It has potential, but something’s holding it back. Is that it?_

 **(21:05)** no take backs. i no wat u rly think after all

 **(21:05)** also ur reading 2 deep… its just a bunch of crap ok

 **(21:07)** _Why the kung fu dragon, though?_

 **(21:08)** …i may hav been talking 2 much 2 a certain person at school… i think shes rubbing off on me

 **(21:11)** _? Okay…_

 **(21:15)** nvm… um just forget we ever had this convo. BYE

* * *

 **(15:59)** _I walked past some martial arts club at school. Do you have a club like that at your school? Perhaps you should join one. It would probably be a good way to vent._

 **(16:02)** honestly!! i told u 2 FORGET about it

 **(16:03)** that was just my 1st attempt at riting a song. leave me alone

 **(16:10)** _Oh? Sorry. I thought you might have some genuine interest._

 **(16:15)** i dont!!

* * *

**13/02/2011**

**(21:04)** sooooo valentines 2moro… u expecting much

 **(21:11)** _Hm? Oh, I’d forgotten. You’re right._

 **(21:13)** i thought u of all ppl wud b on the ball with dates. i thought u were the type to check a daily planner every day

 **(21:14)** _You’re not exactly wrong. I haven’t used my planner in a month or so, though… it’s under a stack of papers on my desk, I think._

 **(21:15)** _As for your question, no, I’m not really expecting anything. Maybe a few cursory chocolates from classmates. The class representative did say something about how she was going to bring in something for everyone._

 **(21:16)** huh, boring

 **(21:16)** wat wud u do??? if some cute blushing girl gave u a perfect little box of handmade chocolates?

 **(21:21)** _Thank her? Eat them, if they’re any good? I don’t know._

 **(21:23)** u wudnt leap on the opportunity then?

 **(21:27)** _No. I’m leaving in just over a month. What use is there in ‘leaping on opportunities’ now?_

 **(21:29)** but if u werent leaving??

 **(21:31)** _But I AM leaving, so there’s no point in discussing hypothetical things._

 **(21:33)** boo…so boring

 **(21:35)** _I’m sorry. I just don’t see any value in thinking about it. What would YOU do, then?_

 **(21:40)** blah, now ur not interested neither am i. lets leave it to rest

* * *

**14/02/2011**

**(12:32)** well at least sum of the girls in the class made chocolates 4 every1. not 2 bad!!

 **(12:34)** and 1 of my… sort of friends?? ill call her that. she gave me a few!! wasnt expecting it. lol she did make it ALL TOO CLEAR they didnt mean anything tho

 **(12:37)** saw sum dude in the corridor getting confessed 2… girl gave him a ttly elaborate luking box. beautifully wrapped. he brushed her off!! can u believe it?? thats popular athletic dudes 4 u, huh?

 **(12:40)** i wish my senpai had given me chocolates… shudve known not 2 get my hopes up tho lol

 **(12:42)** maybe next year ill tell her how much i appreciate her? well idk

* * *

**14/02/2011**

**(19:17)** u may b single, but try not 2 do the experimental drinking thing by urself again… u rly worried me last time

 **(19:31)** _Is that supposed to be a jab at me?_

 **(19:34)** wat? no…

 **(19:36)** its just u werent responding so i was tryin 2… watever nvm

 **(19:40)** _Sorry. One of the teachers at my school tried to covertly give me chocolates, but it seems someone noticed because my entire class seemed to know about it. I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life._

 **(19:45)** o dude… wat, why, how??

 **(19:48)** _Please don’t ask. All I can say is that I’m grateful to be out of here soon._

 **(19:53)** r u a goody2shoes? u gotta b a little meaner 2 ur teachers

 **(19:59)** _What sort of advice is that?!_

 **(20:01)** well its the only advice i can give. sozzz

* * *

**20/02/2011**

**(15:42)** yo!! wats up?

* * *

**23/02/2011**

**(16:02)** man its been 3 days… u sure r cold

 **(16:04)** found a stray cat on my way home from school… looks pretty mangy 2 me but im sure ud like it

 **(16:05)** well bye

* * *

**23/02/2011**

**(23:40)** _Oh, sorry. I didn’t see your text. I was doing some work for my parents._

 **(23:42)** _How are you?_

 **(23:50)** excellent, but sleeping

 **(23:51)** i dont mind. btw. dont think u need 2 reply every day. ur busy. dont worry about me. k nite

 **(00:01)** _Goodnight!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i thought it was only right to have a chapter out on valentines day! this is the last mini chapter i have planned.
> 
> yosuke's attempt at a song, by the way, i credit entirely to my dad. i asked him, 'try writing a song from the perspective of a high school boy trying to be edgy, except he really sucks at songwriting'. that kung fu dragon thing was what he came up with! (his unintentional connection to chie amazed me)


	10. Chapter 10

**March**

Yosuke yawns widely, not even bothered that the teacher might notice and radiate disapproval in his direction. His life as a first year is about to end and he’s quite sick of it, thank you very much. What with Junes, school and more Junes, he’s quite ready to relax over Spring break. Sure, his dad’ll be amping up the hours at some point, but at least for the first few days he’s secured some free time.

“So, Yosuke-kun, got any plans for the holidays?” Chie asks him once school finishes for the day. Yukiko’s gone off by herself – probably busy with the inn, or whatever. In fact, it’s pretty likely that that’s the only reason Chie’s sidled over to chat with him.

“Uh, work, I guess? Sleep?”

“ _What_? You’re so _boring_ ,” she crows. “You’re going to work at Junes. Meanwhile _I’ll_ be watching totally badass kung fu films and learning some moves.”

“Hey, I’ll have you know that every day’s great at your Junes,” Yosuke protests with a grin. “Kung fu films, though? I’ve never actually seen any.”

“No?” Chie looks at him contemplatively. “I mean, I’d lend you one – since you’re not really even alive until you’ve seen this stuff – but…”

“But? What’s with that _but_?”

“Well, you’re _you_ , aren’t you? And my DVD collection is pretty precious.”

“Whaddaya mean, I’m _me_?” he protests.

“How am I meant to know you’re not the type to grab the DVD all wrong and smudge with your fingerprints? Huh?” Chie points her finger accusingly at him, as if she has him all figured out.

“I do _not_! I’ll prove it! Lend me one of your precious kung fu DVDs!” Yosuke puts his hands on his hips. He’s not _that_ clumsy a guy after all... aside from all the bike crashing and dropping of canned food all over the floor at work. But still, he knows how to handle a DVD at least.

“We-ell, since the only other options are depriving you of the right to truly _live_ or to bring it over and watch it _with_ you…” She visibly shudders at this, and Yosuke wonders why he bothers to talk to her when every time he does he can feel his self-esteem crawling deeper into a hole. “Yeah, okay. I’ll bring it on the last day of term. But I had better not find even a _single_ scratch on it, or so help me.” She gives him a loaded look. He understands entirely. Chie’s got strong legs. He’s a sensitive guy. It’s all too clear.

His mobile buzzes loudly in his pocket.

“Huh, you get texts all the time,” Chie notes, perching on the edge of his desk, as if she’s ready to settle for a good long while. “Your city friends? Your parents? Spam?”

“Well, you’re right on all three counts, sort of. I get texts from dad about pretty often and spam mail way more than I’d like. As for friends in the city…” Yosuke opens the text. It’s a picture of a cat – the same white and orange kitten that Stranger had sent a picture of a few months ago, if Yosuke’s not mistaken. It’s grown a lot. There’s a hand outstretched, rubbing behind the cat’s ears. _Stranger’s hand?_

Chie cranes her head so she can peer at the picture. “Hey, that’s really cute. Who sent that?”

“Do you remember all those months back, Chie-chan? When you played a rude trick on me by giving me a totally made up number and told me it was _your_ number?”

“Well, yeah, that’s cause you were a total creep about it. I kind of needed you to calm down and back off a little bit. Uh, sorry though, if it hurt your feelings, or something.” She nods, at least looking a tiny bit abashed. Then she pauses, frowning. “Wait, what are you saying…?”

“I’ve been texting that person ever since. They like cats a lot. And they think I’m great.” Yosuke puffs out his chest a little and goes to type a quick reply.

 **(15:36)** have i seen that little guy b4?

“No way. That’s crazy,” Chie says, blinking. “Really? You’re not making up some wild tale? I bet that’s actually just one of your old friends from the city.”

“Well, it is someone living in the city, I think. But it’s not one of my old friends. I actually don’t talk much to them anymore, to be honest.” Correction: not at all. But he’s not going to tell Chie that.

“Wow. I guess you should be thanking me, huh?” she says cheekily, poking her tongue out and swinging her legs.

“Well, maybe,” Yosuke says, smiling slightly.

 **(15:38)** _Yep. I’m pretty sure that this is the same kitten I met ages back. Look how much she’s grown! Isn’t she gorgeous?_

Yosuke doesn’t notice Chie reading over his shoulder until she begins to giggle. “Is this your online _girlfriend_ , Yosuke-kun?”

Yosuke flushes hotly, unable to help himself. “ _No_! No way! He’s a _guy_.”

“Oh, really? Well, maybe I read that one wrong.” She looks at the text again. “A real cat lover you’ve got there.”

“No kidding,” Yosuke says drily.

“Ah, Hanamura-kun? A word, please?” That’s his teacher, approaching from seemingly out of nowhere. She _is_ known for being sneaky. Chie leaps off the desk in a hurry and Yosuke gets quickly to his feet, tossing the phone under his desk.

“Yes, that’s fine!” It better not be about his subpar grades. No, if it were, surely she’d want Chie too?

She leads him over to her desk and promptly lectures him on Yasogami’s standards for homework completion and, ah, he should have seen this coming, really. He’s been improving! And it’s not like he’s any worse than Chie – although, he doesn’t have his own personal Yukiko to remind him to do anything.

When he finally escapes back to his own desk – thank god he doesn’t have work today – he becomes aware of something very, very bad.

Chie is on his phone, tapping away.

“ _AHHH_!” He runs over and snatches it from her, holding it high out of her reach. “What are you _doing_? Don’t you have any sense of – of privacy? Geez!”

She just smirks at him, arms folded.

Yosuke needs to know what damage she’s done, and _fast_.

 **(15:40)** mRROW that is a SXC as hell cat

He’s already terrified.

 **(15:41)** _Uh, Wrono?_

 **(15:42)** wrono?? that ur cute lil name for him?? hehe

 **(15:42)** u need 2 thank me u no if wat he sed is true ;) ;)

 **(15:43)** _Who is this??_

 **(15:43)** a classmate!! he says u 2 got 2 talkin cos i gave him ur # as a mistake ;)

 **(15:43)** i thot u wer his gf tho lol

 **(15:44)** _I’m not a girl. And are you really? Don’t you feel bad, playing a trick like that?_

 **(15:44)** nup he did dserve it u no. u try bein hit on by him ok

 **(15:44)** ur the 1 he txts ALL THE TIME then??

 **(15:45)** _I don’t know._

And that’s all. Yosuke has to admit it could’ve been worse. He darts a look at Chie, who still has that smug look on her face.

“Well, thanks for not embarrassing me too much,” he sighs.

She flips her hair, makes a peace sign at him and skips out of the room without so much as a, “Seeya!” That suits him just fine. He stands up, absentmindedly stuffing a pencil on the desk into his pocket, and follows her, albeit much more slowly, out into the corridor. As he walks, he texts Stranger back.

 **(15:47)** wow o man im sorry 4 that. teacher wanted 2 talk and i didnt expect her 2 go and steal my phone wtf

 **(15:50)** _It was sort of interesting. Anyway, I need to get home. Parents are finalising details for my transfer._

 **(15:51)** o i see. thats sort of a shame, u talked 2 my classmate even more than u did with me haha

 **(15:52)** _Sorry!_

 **(15:53)** np. u hav a fun nite sorting out transfers

* * *

It’s the last day of term and Yosuke’s by his locker, delicately placing the DVD case Chie brought for him in his bag. Very delicately indeed. She’s watching him closely.

“So, how’s your not-girlfriend from the city going?” she asks once she’s satisfied he’s placed the DVD into his bag with enough care and respect.

“Uh… okay?”

In truth, they haven’t spoken much. Yosuke’s starting to wonder if he never should’ve said that thing about connections wearing away, because it’s becoming harder and harder to keep up a conversation with Stranger without it either dying out awkwardly or Stranger saying he has stuff he really needs to do.

“That doesn’t sound very okay,” Chie says, eyebrows furrowing.

“Well, he’s transferring schools for his second year, so he’s busy as hell right now. We don’t get the chance to talk much. Hopefully it’ll be all good once he’s settled in at the new place.”

“Hmm. It’s kind of impressive you’ve kept up a friendship through texting since October anyways,” Chie shrugs. “Surely it’s fine if you stop talking as much?”

“Don’t say crap like that!” Yosuke says heatedly, shaking his head. “He’s been…a real support, y’know? I can’t just give up.”

“Well, you can always make new friends, you know? Surely it’s not healthy to be so attached to some stranger?”

Chie’s trying to help, Yosuke knows. This is probably the most serious conversation she’s ever had with him. But… “No, Chie. I don’t have to choose one or the other. It’s not like I’m only allowed to have one... one _type_ of friend, honestly!”

“Okay, okay,” Chie says placatingly, raising her hands. “I believe you. All I’m saying is don’t be too sad if you both end up moving onto other things.”

“I’m not that pathetic,” Yosuke mutters to himself, hoisting his bag more securely onto his shoulder. “I’ll see you in a few weeks, Chie-chan. I’ll bring back your DVD in _mint_ condition.”

A teasing light returns to her eyes as she waves. “Oh, yes, Yosuke-kun. It had better be.”

Just as she says that, someone walks around the corner and looks straight at the two of them. It’s some guy Yosuke doesn’t know, with straight, dark hair that hangs around his face. When his gaze rests on Chie, his face brightens almost imperceptibly.

“Hey, Chie-chan,” he calls, and comes right on over. “Got any plans for the holidays?”

“Oh, Kou-kun?” She looks faintly surprised to see him. “Well, I’m going to train, I guess? And I’ll hang out with Yukiko whenever she’s not busy. And watch movies, of course. How about you?”

“I don’t know. Basketball, probably.” ‘Kou-kun’ shrugs nonchalantly – too nonchalantly. Yosuke may not be a genius by any means, but it’s incredibly obvious to him that this guy’s trying to hide a giant crush on Chie. Which is... sort of hilarious. Just as Yosuke’s thinking this, Kou’s gaze moves over to rest on him. Yosuke's quick to put on one of his automatic smiles, because the last time a basketball player tried to interact with him, it really didn’t go so well.

“Hanamura-kun, right?” Kou says, and there’s absolutely no malice in it. Yosuke relaxes, trying to get his expression to look a little more natural.

“Yep, the infamous Yosuke Hanamura,” he says with a sheepish nod.

“Hey, well I’m Kou Ichijo, class 1-1.” Kou’s still smiling. That seems like a good sign. “So, you two…?”

“ _No_ ,” Yosuke says, and realises belatedly that Chie said the exact same thing at the exact same time.

“He’s not so bad, though,” Chie says as an afterthought. “But god no. Not my boyfriend. Never.”

“You can be really cruel, you know that, Chie-chan?” Yosuke says, putting on an exaggerated pout. Privately, he agrees. Not his girlfriend, never.

“Oh, never mind then,” Kou says, chuckling. Yosuke doesn't miss his tiny sigh of relief. “Anyhow, you two busy? Daisuke totally ditched me to go practice soccer in his backyard, so… we could go get steaks, or something?”

 _Oh boy, you’ve played your cards right,_ Yosuke thinks as Chie’s eyes light up. “Sure, I’m free,” he puts in before she can launch her inevitable rant about just how good the steaks at Souzai Daigoku are.

And Kou, despite the fact that he obviously only came to speak to Chie, gives him a grateful sort of grin. _Ah_ … So he wants a sidekick, then. Perhaps it isn’t the way Yosuke anticipated himself making friends, but he’s happy nonetheless. Things really _are_ on their way up.

* * *

On the fourth day of his Yosuke’s break, he meets up with Kou, Chie and Kou’s friend Daisuke. It’s a bit awkward, because they go to Junes and all the workers stare at Yosuke like he’s an idiot for showing up on his day off. Not to mention Kou and Chie act like he’s a tour guide the whole time. But it’s good fun anyway. Junes, even with the annoying tune blaring through the intercom system and its subpar food, isn’t a terrible place to hang out.  

However, despite his luck with friends in Inaba, the first five days of spring break pass by with absolutely no response from Stranger. Yosuke’s beginning to feel just as pathetic as he’d assured Chie he wasn’t.

The first day, Yosuke texts Stranger: YOOoOoOooo i dont even hav work 2day wat am i meant 2 do? maybe ill polish my songwriting lol

The next: i still suck ass at songwriting but u no im not so bad at the guitar. and i can sort of sing. maybe. mum thinks me playin guitar is productive heheh

And after that: ok so i no u havnt replied 4 like 2 days but i figure u hav sum sort of reason. and i cant give up now!!! not after coming so far!!!! *sheds manly tear* even if it breaks me…. i will defeat the evil within this nation……

The fourth day: sorry 4 that txt yesterday i sent u that after marathoning sum phoenix ranger featherman r or watever the hell its called. actually kind of gud despite its shit name and it being a kids show hehe. also believe it or not – i hung out with some friends 2day!!! it was gr8

The fifth: wat on earth r u even doin??? anyways today’s update: did more guitaring and singing. so objectively i am not actually THAT bad, i recorded it and played it back and all. wat do u think is the likelihood of me achieving fame and fortune if i quit school and bcum a musician???

He’s in the middle of writing his text on the sixth day, feeling considerably less cheerful than his silly conversation starters would imply.

 **(12:42)** i guess my measure of success sort of wud also depend on my luks tho. ugh and

That’s as far as he gets before the phone vibrates. He quickly exits the message, figuring it’s too stupid to send anyway.

 **(12:42)** _Sorry. I feel really bad. Have been really gross and sick since last day of school. Still feel like death._

 _I'll believe you,_ Yosuke thinks.  _But whatever, it's fine. I'm used to friends dropping out of contact_   _without any reason at all_. 

Things are getting better at school, anyhow. Maybe Chie's right. Maybe it's okay if Stranger can't be bothered to text him anymore. Even as the thoughts cross his mind, he realises that he can't ignore the sinking sensation in his stomach. 

 **(12:43)** sick in spring??? tough luck :(

 **(12:45)** _Indeed_

 **(12:47)** sending u tissues and toilet bowls and all sorts of medicines and soup thru my phone

Yosuke kind of expects any of the following in reply, based on all their conversations so far:

  *          _You can fit a toilet bowl through your phone? Just how chunky is it? One of those ancient models?_
  *          _Stop! You don’t need to destroy your phone with soup for my sake!_
  *          _Thank you. You’re too kind to me Wrono <3_



Maybe he’s being a tad optimistic with the last one, but he can still entertain the possibility, right? And it’s not gay to expect a heart. Stranger does use the heart symbol. Sometimes.

 **(12:55)** _Haha_

Yosuke stares at the text in consternation. He kind of wants to retort with a, “GOD WAT HAV U DONE??? LEFT IT OFF WITH A HAHA? EVERY1 NOS U CAN NEVER RESPOND 2 SHIT LIKE THAT”. Then again, Stranger’s feeling like crap. Yosuke probably shouldn’t blow up. That’d be rude. Not that a text only saying ‘Haha’ isn’t rude, but maybe Stranger’s not aware of that.

 **(12:56)** i guess ill leave u alone to get ur rest then. hope u get better :)

That’s civil enough, right?

He never finds out if Stranger thinks so. There’s no response.

* * *

In the city, another boy rolls over on the couch. He has a pile of blankets heaped on him, his toes poking out from the other side. The TV is turned up pretty loud and the boy stares at it with glazed over eyes.

The phone lies abandoned on the coffee table. It vibrates, but the boy doesn’t notice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know what you're all thinking: april. april is next.
> 
> as a side-note, i totally had souji marry yosuke in persona q and everything in the world is good.


	11. Chapter 11

Yosuke stares at his reflection in the mirror and hopes to god he doesn’t _really_ look that grey. And what’s with that stubborn tuft of hair that just _won’t_ sit flat?

“Come on, Yosuke,” he says, breathing in deep. “Today’s the beginning of the whole _rest of your life_. It’s today. You’re gonna get to your new class, throw the door wide open and everyone’s going to applaud and you’ll have like 30 friends, suddenly. There’ll be a party.”

“Hoho, you’re so funny,” he replies. To himself.

Before his mental state can deteriorate any further, he goes to get his bike and wheels it outside. He’s not sure why he still uses the damn thing. Lately it seems like he swerves and crashes any moment he’s not fully focussed on exactly where he’s going. Stupid thing.

He’s going to blame his crazy state of mind on Stranger. Stranger, who texted him this morning, much to his surprise. It’s not like they’ve bothered to discuss the fact that Stranger’s texts and replies are incredibly infrequent these days – Yosuke doesn’t want to put Stranger off any further – so it’s always a bit of a shock when he checks his phone and sees the word ‘Stranger’ pop up.

 **(08:01)** _Spent my first night here in the new place. Cosy sort of town. Going to try make an impression at my new school, like you told me to. Good luck for your new second year start as well!_

Yosuke never responded, since he was busy attempting to fix his hair at the time and there’s really no rush at all to reply to Stranger these days. But he can’t help but be relieved that Stranger still thinks to text him at least sometimes. Placing his phone carefully into his pocket, he gets on his bike and heads off.

* * *

Yosuke’s on his way to school and everything’s going good. The bike’s pedalling smoothly and the wind feels pretty good in his hair.

…Who is he kidding? It’s freaking _raining_. That makes riding the bike a nightmare, one hand on the handlebars, one hand trying (and failing) to keep an umbrella steady above his head. His hair gets all gross and frizzy if it gets rained on much, so he had to get his umbrella out to try to at least salvage his appearance. It’s not until he’s nearly at school, having ridden all the way in this precarious position, that it occurs to him that he probably should’ve just left the bike at home and walked. Or even hopped off halfway there and just walked the bike, lateness be damned.

As he’s distracted with this realisation of his own idiocy, the handles suddenly slide out of grip and he’s out of control, shouting in horror (and a little bit of resignation, since this happens pretty often). He tips over by a giant pile of garbage, partly cushioned by his bag but still hitting the concrete hard. The pros: he managed to miss the garbage, so he doesn’t stink of rotting food. The cons: He fell hard into a gutter, feels like he just broke his ribs and is _completely_ wet. Also, there are quite a few people walking by. Most of them just keep walking, like they’re used to seeing disastrous bike crashes, or something. But he’s faintly aware of one boy – someone he doesn’t recognise at all – pausing, hovering as if about to offer a hand.

 _Yes, please,_ Yosuke thinks.

The other boy keeps walking.

 _Thanks! A lot!_ Yosuke thinks sarcastically at his retreating back.

Groaning, he reaches for the umbrella – it rolled a couple of metres away – and holds it above his head, forcing himself upright. The boy who’d hesitated continues to walk, albeit quite slowly. Yosuke glares at his back, although he’s not quite sure why he does it. It’s not as if anyone else bothered to help him anyway. Just as he’s about to stop his petty glaring, the other boy glances over his shoulder, right at Yosuke.

Their eyes meet. The boy looks faintly startled, his shoulders rising defensively. Yosuke has to wonder what sort of picture _he_ presents – bedraggled and hunched over in pain. It must look pathetic. But after a couple of seconds, the boy turns and hurries away.

Yosuke sighs. _Whatever_.

* * *

He gets to class eventually, and on time too, even if he’s feeling rather worse for wear. He wasn’t able to save his hair from frizziness – at least the tuft that used to be sticking out is gone, plastered right to his skull. His uniform’s soggy as well. Not to mention he probably has bruises on his bruises, that’s how sore he feels from the fall. He goes straight to his seat, collapses into the chair and lays his head on the wooden surface of his desk. It’s not exactly a pillow, but it’ll do.

He doesn’t think the day can get any worse until he overhears muttered complaints of ‘King Moron’ and notices faintly that Chie’s sitting at the desk to his front and right.

Chie. Chie’s DVD. The DVD in his bag. The DVD in the very same bag that Yosuke half-landed on in the crash. The DVD that has to be returned in mint condition. He takes a swift peek in his bag – it’s covered in dirt and even damper than he is – and pries open the case. _Oh god. God, no._ The DVD has an impossibly giant crack in it. Why does this shit always have to happen to _him_? And why did he think it was a good idea to have Chie lend him a DVD about some kung fu crap he’s not really interested in?

 _New year, new life, my ass,_ Yosuke thinks.

“…from the city. Just like you, huh, Yosuke?” he hears Chie say.

He groans at her. It’s meant to mean, _Can you say that again?_

“…Huh? You look dead today.”

“Yeah, um… I don’t wanna talk about it,” he mumbles. Apparently groaning’s not the best method of communication.

“What’s with him?” Chie mutters in hushed tones.

“Who knows?” someone else says. He takes a quick look. It’s Yukiko. So they’re all in the same class again. It seems like absolutely nothing has changed.

He dozes a little bit, since King Moron’s taking his time to get his ass to class, and doesn’t really pay attention to anything until he hears a collective gasp from the rest of the students. Curious, he lifts his head. Just a tiny bit.

The guy who was _about_ to help him out this morning is at the front of the class, hand on his hip, staring levelly at King Moron, who looks… well, pretty angry. His face is flushed and he’s sort of gnashing his teeth.

“What happened? Yosuke whispers to the person next to him.

“The transfer student just talked back to King Moron,” is the awed reply.

 _Oh man. Is he an idiot?_ Yosuke wonders, turning his gaze back to the guy at the front. Maybe he is. His grey hair is cut in a way that totally shouldn’t be cool, except on second thought, he kind of pulls it off.

Well, whatever. The only empty desk is right in front of Yosuke – there’s plenty of time to figure out the new kid. Hopefully they can be transfer student buddies, as long as the guy’s not secretly really shady. Because talking back to King Moron? Clearly that means _something’s_ up.

He lays his head back on his arms and hopes to god King Moron doesn’t pay him any mind.

* * *

When school ends – with some weird announcements about an ‘incident’ that get everyone all excited, because that’s all it takes to get people worked up in Inaba – the transfer guy’s approached by Chie and Yukiko. So much for Yosuke’s chance of either introducing himself as a fellow transfer student or – and he shudders at the prospect – giving back the DVD without anyone to witness his humiliation.

He’d better just get it over and done with.

So he approaches Chie, trying to not look overly suspicious. The new guy turns his cool grey eyes to him and there’s a flash of recognition. Yosuke wonders what he’s thinking. _Oh, it’s that loser who crashed his bike this morning._ Yeah, that sounds about right.

“Ch-chie-chan!” Yosuke says as brightly as he possibly can in his current state, cursing himself for the stutter. “Great to be back, huh?”

“…Yeah,” she says, sounding incredibly unimpressed.

“Look, about that DVD you loaned me… it was _incredible_. Really, you have supreme taste and I am _so_ thankful you lent me it, you have no idea.” With trembling fingers, he extracts the DVD from his bag. At least the case looks alright, by some miracle.

“Well, sure,” Chie says. “But why’re you acting so funny, Yosuke-kun?” She tilts her head suspiciously. Yosuke wets his lips and glances back and forth between Yukiko and the transfer student, who awkwardly hang back.

“Um… just… _please_ , I’ll make it up to you! My next paycheck is real soon, I swear! Just wait ‘til then, okay? Okay? Okay, _bye_!” Yosuke makes a break for it.

He swears he’s running as fast as he can, and it’s not like he’s slow by any means. But, quite suddenly, Chie’s in front of him, her eyes so dark and fiery he swears he can see the very depths of hell within them. And if the transfer student didn’t already think Yosuke was a loser, he almost certainly does after Chie lands a kick to his balls, leaving him curled over and groaning. That much is evident in the way the guy hangs awkwardly in front of Yosuke as if to say something before simply turning and leaving again.

Really, so much for a new start. _This year’s going to be the worst._

* * *

Yosuke decides to try Stranger later that night, in hopes of some reassurance that his second year’ll be anything less than hell.

 **(21:08)** 2nd year off 2 an AWFUL start. thx rain

There’s no reply, not until he’s about to go to sleep.

 **(22:32)** _That’s a pity. First day at new school today. It’s not a bad place. My cousin is very sweet, but I’m a little worried. Doesn’t seem like my uncle’s around all that much and she’s very young._

 **(22:34)** _Already met some nice people who I can make friends with! And one of the guys at school was really interesting. Way more interesting than at my old schools. I don’t know if it’s because I’m actually paying attention now, but he was just… interesting? I wanted to talk to him but I didn’t know how to. Maybe I’ll tell you about this guy another time and you can give me some ideas, cause you’re better at this stuff than me. For now I need to make sure my cousin’s alright! Night!_

Hearing about Stranger’s fun day is really no reassurance, even if Yosuke’s mood lifts just a little bit when Stranger says he wants advice from Yosuke. He considers sending a tart, ‘gud 4 u’, but he doesn’t want to look so petty. He’s already made enough of a fool out of himself today. In a bit of a huff, he goes to bed.

* * *

The next day starts off no better. He crashes his bike – again – and this time finds himself in an inconveniently placed bin, forming the realisation that he’s literally trash. Really, he may as well just curl up in this bin and call it home.

“Someone…!” he groans, attempting to extract himself.

And then, much to his surprise, he feels a strong grip on his legs that hauls him out. He blinks up at his saviour. Wide grey eyes, weird grey bowl haircut… oh, the transfer student. Yosuke, with some trepidation, tries his most winning smile. The other guy smiles back, if only slightly, and offers a hand. Yosuke takes it, and the transfer student helps him to his feet. In the back of his mind, Yosuke notes that the guy has pretty long fingers.

“Thanks! You really saved me, uh…” He scratches his head. “Sorry, I didn’t catch your name, yesterday. You’re the transfer student though, right?”

“Yes. Souji Seta,” he says with a polite nod.

“Right! Well, I’m Yosuke Hanamura. Nice to meet you!”

Souji’s smile broadens a tiny bit, and his entire posture relaxes. He looks far more natural now, and Yosuke has to wonder if maybe he’s _not_ the only nervous one here. “Nice to meet you too. Are… are you alright?” Souji gestures vaguely towards the bike and then looks back at Yosuke, expression soft with concern. Yosuke, not used to such a look being directed at him, sputters a nervous sort of laugh.

“Oh, me? Heheh, I’m alright. At least garbage makes for a soft landing,” he says, trying to shrug nonchalantly. He glances off to the side, unable to meet Souji’s eyes. That’s when he notices that there’s absolutely no one around. “Oh crap – we’re gonna be late! Hey, you want a ride? I mean, the bike’s a little squeaky, but…”

Souji lifts an eyebrow. “I think I’d prefer to just walk,” he says. He looks amused, though. “Maybe you ought to just stick to walking too, for now. Do you want me to walk your bike for you?”

“Ahh, no, that’s alright,” Yosuke says with a sheepish smile. “But thanks.”

They spend the rest of the walk to school discussing the mysterious murder – because that’s the only thing there is to talk about in Inaba right now, it seems. And even though it’s pretty typical as far as any conversation about mysterious murders can be, Yosuke feels an odd warmth permeating him. No – it isn’t just a nameless feeling. It’s hope.

The new guy – Souji – he seems alright, after all.

* * *

Yosuke forms a plan as the day goes by and King Moron drones on. The transfer student is _definitely_ his best bet at making a new friend. And Yosuke’s best bet at making any friends at all is probably through bribes. More specifically, the promise of free food.

Souji seems pretty receptive when, during lunch break, Yosuke suggests they get steak after school, his eyes brightening as listens to Yosuke’s plan. They’re at their desks, Souji’s chair angled back towards Yosuke.

“I mean, it’s just steak, but I owe you,” Yosuke says.

Souji nods, but before he can say anything, another voice pipes up from behind Yosuke.

“Yosuke, did you say _steak?_ ”

So, unfortunately, Chie ends up tagging along. Probably with the intention of embarrassing Yosuke and making sure he never experiences any happiness in his life, ever. Why did he insist on borrowing that DVD, again?

He doesn’t exactly want to spend _too_ much money today though, especially since his hours will be cut down what with school starting again. So, as much as it pains him, he takes them both to Junes. Chie looks suitably unimpressed by this, but Souji seems interested, glancing around at all the stands open at the foodcourt.

“I didn’t expect there to be a Junes out here,” he comments as Yosuke comes back to the table with three iced drinks.

“Yeah, well, don’t get too excited,” Chie grumbles, eyeing the tray. “They don’t do grilled steaks here!”

“You can’t expect me to buy _three_ steaks, Chie-chan. I’m not that loaded,” he sighs.

“Still no reason for you to take us to _your_ place!”

Yosuke rolls his eyes. “Dude, this isn’t _my_ place or anything.”

Souji, who was previously staring at a couple of kids throwing food at each other, turns his attention to the two of them. He tilts his head. Yosuke guesses that means he’s wondering what they’re talking about.

“I haven’t told you yet, huh? I work here. My dad…” Yosuke cuts himself off. No, there’s no need to get into that crap now. Souji narrows his eyes, as if in thought. He says nothing, though. Perhaps he’s a man of few words. “So anyway,” Yosuke continues, “This is to welcome you to town! Here.”

He pushes the drink across the table to Souji who takes it with a murmured, “Thank you.”

“Hey, no problem. Anything for a friend,” Yosuke says with a wink. Souji stares, mouth open in a tiny ‘o’, then just nods and smiles down at the table.

They spend a while chatting, and Yosuke actually ends up feeling sort of grateful about Chie’s presence. She fills gaps in the conversation with her chatter and she’s not really one to freak out in the middle of a conversation like Yosuke, so everything feels really natural. Souji slowly starts to open up, and Yosuke finds himself getting caught up in his voice whenever he speaks. There’s something reassuring about it – though he speaks a little slowly, there’s precision to his words and a thoughtful tone to them.

It’s as Chie’s ranting about some kung fu thing or another – all the while throwing Yosuke dark, meaningful looks – that Yosuke notices Saki sit down at a nearby table, sighing heavily. He feels a bit of a pang in his chest. She always looks so down lately, and he really has no clue why.

“Um, do you guys mind? I’m just going to…” He mutters half an explanation to the others before standing abruptly, ignoring their curious eyes. “Saki-senpai!” He calls, trying to inject all the cheer he can muster into his voice. Her head swings round at the sound of her name, and she offers him a weary sort of smile.

“Hey, Hana-chan, how’s it going?” She tips her head to look past him. “Here with your friends? Supporting the family business, are we?”

Yosuke rubs the back of his neck and smiles sheepishly. “Ahh, it’s really not like that! It’s just all I can really afford, since I’m treating them.”

Saki hums thoughtfully at that, tilting her head back and closing her eyes. Yosuke presses his lips together, not really sure how he should go about talking to her.

“Senpai… you look kind of down. Are you alright?”

She straightens up a bit when he says that and forces a smile. “Oh, yeah, don’t worry about me. I’m just tired, you know how it gets.”

Yosuke stares intently at her and she just looks at the table, her lips still turned up. “Okay,” he says finally. “But I’m here for you, if you ever want someone to talk to, alright?”

“Aw, thank you. I appreciate it,” she says, but she still isn’t looking at him. Instead, she’s looking straight at Souji. “Oh, hey, that’s the transfer student, right?”

Yosuke can’t help the stab of jealousy, because _hey_ , he was a transfer student himself not so long ago. What exactly makes Souji so interesting? But he follows her gaze, meeting Souji’s calm grey eyes, and can’t help but relax. There just _is_ a certain something about Souji, isn’t there? Yosuke can’t fault him for it.

Without waiting for Yosuke to confirm anything, Saki stands up and heads over to speak to him, with Yosuke following a little more slowly. Even though Souji’s doing a good job of looking composed, Yosuke doesn’t miss the way his face twitches in surprise.

“Yo, you’re the new kid, right?” Saki says, smiling warmly at Souji. He nods slowly. “My name’s Saki Konishi. I’m a third year at the same school as you and Hana-chan.”

“Souji Seta,” is the cordial reply.

“You’re from the city, right?” Saki continues. “Make sure to keep Hana-chan company, won’t you? He doesn’t seem to hang around with many guys in his year.”

Yosuke winces. “Haha, it’s not really like that, Senpai,” he tries weakly, even as he thinks, _it’s exactly like that._ From most people he’d take the comment as pretty mean, but he knows Saki’s only trying to look out for him.

“He’s nosy, too,” Saki adds, eyes twinkling mischievously. “You’ve pretty much got to tell him right to his face if he starts to get on your nerves, alright?”

“He isn’t,” Souji says after a brief pause. “He’s really nice. He’s made me feel really welcome.”

 _Souji…!_ Yosuke can’t help but grin brightly at the other boy, who, upon noticing the look Yosuke’s got on his face, smiles in return.

“Haha, you know I’m kidding. He’s not too bad at all,” Saki says with a tiny shrug and a laugh, and Yosuke can’t help but be relieved at that. “Really, you two get along, alright? As for me, I’d better get back to work.” With a wave, she makes to leave. Yosuke opens his mouth to call her back, even though he doesn’t really know what to say. But she walks so quickly that he doesn’t really get the chance, and in the end, he just stares blankly after her retreating back.

 _Feel better, Senpai_ , he thinks.

“You totally _like_ her,” Chie accuses with a note of laughter (evil, _evil_ laughter) in her voice, and he immediately turns his attention back to their conversation, thinking of a suitable retort. Saki can wait – he’ll think of what to say to her by the time they get another shift together.

* * *

It’s only after Yosuke waves goodbye to Souji and Chie after hours of easy chatting, feeling more optimistic than ever, that he realises that he totally forgot to ask Souji for his number. Perhaps it’s for the best, anyhow. He wouldn’t want to be rejected _again_ , not after Chie tricked him so thoroughly last year.

But somehow, Yosuke feels that Souji wouldn’t be the type to play a joke like that on him. And with Stranger being so oddly distant, Yosuke kind of wishes he could have Souji to text instead. After all, he has to stay up late so he can check out the ‘Midnight Channel’ or whatever – one of Chie’s stupid rumours.

And Stranger? Well, he sure likes to take his time responding to Yosuke’s texts. Once again, it’s pretty late before he gets a reply.

 **(22:58)** _Sorry I keep texting you so late. I’m trying to get to know my cousin the best I can and I only properly finished unpacking today._

 **(21:59)** _How are you? I had a really nice day. I’ve met some wonderful people._

Yosuke frowns down at the phone, trying his hardest not to feel a stab of jealousy at hearing Stranger call someone else wonderful. It sure sounds like he’s having a nice time of the move. But he’s growing sort of sick of Stranger only ever texting when it’s convenient for him, expecting Yosuke to _always_ be there.

 **(23:05)** better day than yesterday

 **(23:10)** _Yet I’m getting grumpy vibes._

 **(23:11)** im just peachy

Yosuke throws the phone onto the other side of the couch and leans back, glowering at the blank screen of his television. His reflection glares right back.

* * *

And far nearer than Yosuke realises, another boy sighs and tosses his phone onto his table. He could’ve done with something to keep him busy until midnight when the TV’s supposedly going to turn on, but it doesn’t matter, because that particular connection is wearing away, the edges of it roughening every time he attempts to fix it.

He thinks about a boy with dyed brown hair and a girl with a green jacket and feels better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> april at last! sadly, this also (probably) marks the end of my regular updates! with university officially starting next monday, my free time's going to be cut down. i'll keep working to make sure you guys don't have to wait too long, though! thanks as always for all your support. <3


	12. Chapter 12

It comes as a shock – the realisation that death is very different, when it isn’t spoken of by dispassionate news readers and gossiping classmates. Mayumi Yamano’s body strung up on an antenna is certainly horrible to think about, but she isn’t alive, and Yosuke never met her. She may as well be an object, or a statistic, or a case file.

When the principal announces the passing away of Saki Konishi (Class 3-3), Yosuke’s stomach turns in on itself. His knees shake. He has to focus all of his thoughts into simply staying put, into staying on his feet, into not sprinting right out of the hall. He mustn’t cause a scene, now.

But it isn’t long before his thoughts worm out from his grasp. They tangle together. He sees Saki’s face, the dark bags under her eyes and the tight smile.

_I was going to… I wanted to…_

Faintly, just faintly, Yosuke hears the principal dismiss them and he turns on his heel, shoving his way through the muttering crowd – “ _do you think the murderer wanted to shut her up?”_ someone says loudly, speculatively – and rushes out. Out. The bathroom will do.

The scrape of the lock of the cubicle door coincides with a ragged gasp that Yosuke hadn’t even realised he’d been holding in. He presses his forehead against the door and clenches his fists so hard that his fingernails dig painfully into his palms. Hot tears squeeze from beneath his eyelids. His entire body feels _taut_. Like if he lets go now, something’s going to break.

_Why her? How is any of this fair?_

The door into the bathroom opens, creaking in its distinctive way. Yosuke holds his breath.

“Yosuke, are you there?” comes a tentative voice. Souji.

“Yeah, just a minute,” Yosuke answers reflexively, his voice straining to imitate any semblance of normal and okay.

“It’s okay. You can stay there. Um…” Yosuke hears a shuffling sound. Souji scuffing his shoes against the linoleum floor, perhaps. “It’s terrible. About Konishi-san. If you want to talk about it…”

A violent tremor runs through Yosuke’s entire body, and he gulps in a shuddering breath. “In a bit. You just go back to class while I wash up.”

“Yosuke…”

“Please.” Yosuke doesn’t mean for his voice to tremble so much, but it’s totally beyond his control.

Souji leaves after a moment, only the sound of the creaking door telling Yosuke that he’s gone. Yosuke tips his head back, staring up into the harsh white light embedded in the ceiling as if he’s meeting the eye of some dispassionate god and cries so hard he feels as if he’s bleeding out.

* * *

It doesn’t take long for Yosuke’s wild emotions to consolidate themselves into things entirely new – feelings he has a better chance of keeping a rein on, for now at least. Grief still throbs somewhere beneath his ribcage, but now there’s anger – a righteous anger, something akin to determination.

Saki-senpai was _murdered_. And the moment that thought passes through his mind, a spike of fury coming with it, it’s like he suddenly knows all the answers. Maybe it’s his brain on adrenalin, or something, but a few things become immediately obvious to him.

Senpai had been on the TV last night – there may as well have been a giant target painted on her face. And hadn’t there been rumours of Mayumi Yamano showing up on the Midnight Channel as well? From then on, the logic is all too simple, even if the resulting conclusion sounds beyond ridiculous:

The TV is somehow killing people.

Or, more specifically, the world inside it is a murder weapon and someone, like Teddie had complained, is throwing people to their death.

He trudges to class and pushes the door open, head down. “Hanamura, you’re late,” King Moron sneers in his awful, grating voice, and Yosuke mutters an apology before slinking to his desk. He knows King Moron’s going on about it, probably ranting about the insolence of kids these days, but his mind’s hardly on what his teacher has to say.

They’d fallen into the TV yesterday, Souji plummeting in first, Yosuke’s hand curled tight around his wrist as they fell through static and flashing colours. They’d discovered a _world_ there, a place with stifling fog and the most surreal atmosphere Yosuke’d ever come across.

He’d thought, _this is insane_. He’d thought, _never doing that again._ He’d wondered if anyone else knew of the place, or if it only existed to the three of them, he, Souji and Chie.

 _If it does_ , Yosuke thinks, head bowed low over his desk, _then no one will ever come to understand how Saki-senpai died._

He grits his teeth.

* * *

He shrugs off Souji’s hand on his shoulder after school and goes straight to the roof, needing some air. He knows that this had been one of Saki-senpai’s favourite places to sit, that she and her friends came up here whenever they didn’t have anything else to do. Now it’s totally empty. It’s no surprise. The fog today is almost as bad as it had been in the TV world and there’s a light drizzle, not enough to make him head back inside but certainly enough to dampen his jacket.

After a few minutes of staring blankly at the wire fencing that runs along the edge of the rooftop, Yosuke feels the distinct and familiar sensation of his phone vibrating in his pocket. He briefly imagines that it’s a message from Saki-senpai. Then again, he never did work up the courage to ask for her number.

He checks it. It’s Stranger.

 **(15:39)** _Can I ask you for some advice?_

Yosuke shakes his head at the screen, strands of hair falling around his face.

 **(15:39)** no

 **(15:40)** _Oh. Then can I ask why not?_

 **(15:41)** bcus im sick of holding our convos wenever its convenient 4 u.

 **(15:42)** _Okay. Am I meant to apologise for having more going on in my life?_

 **(15:42)** thats not the problem

It’s odd – he wants to cry, but his eyes are totally dry.

 **(15:43)** its obvious ur only forcing urself 2 talk 2 me these days. its fine. u go live ur life now that its so fulfilling. u can leave me if u want.

 **(15:45)** _How on earth did you get that impression?!_

 **(15:45)** forget it

 **(15:46)** i have something 2 do this afternoon so bye

 **(15:46)** _Wrono, I’m not just going to let you leave it at that._

 **(15:46)** _We’re going to talk later, alright?_

Yosuke smiles thinly. _Sure_ , he thinks. _If I make it back out of the TV world okay. Sure._

He comes across Souji and Chie in the second floor corridor. Souji’s shoulders look very stiff and Chie’s glaring at a pair of girls heading down the stairs. Souji, upon noticing Yosuke’s approach, stands a little straighter. Yosuke forces himself to smile.

“Hey guys,” he says quietly, coming to a stop a short distance away. “I’ve been thinking about something and I need you to hear me out.”

“Yosuke…” Chie trails off. She shoves her hands into her pockets.

“How are you?” Souji tries. His eyes are very wide.

“Me?” Yosuke chuckles and tilts his head. “I think I’m good.” He's not, but that’s beside the matter. “Look, did either of you watch the TV last night…?”

* * *

“I’m sorry for dragging you along,” Yosuke says as they head along a misty path, Teddie bouncing along behind them.

“It’s okay,” Souji shrugs. “I’ve never done anything like this before. It’s interesting.”

Yosuke laughs, the sound of it very sharp in the oppressive silence of the TV world, because really? Who _has_ done something like this before? “I just… really need to find out who would do this to Saki-senpai, you know?”

Souji gives him a sideways look full of sympathy. “I want to help you,” he says, and it’s so earnest that Yosuke wants to take him by the shoulders and shake him, shake him until he comes to his senses. It’s no good, being so willing to throw himself into danger like this.

He doesn’t want to lose Souji – he’s already lost enough.

* * *

_I always wanted to tell Hana-chan… that he was a real pain in the ass._

The words hit hard, a sudden queasiness digging claws into his stomach. “P-pain in the ass…?” he repeats.

…But he is, isn’t he? To everyone he meets. It’s just that some make their opinion of him more clear than others. What an idiot he was for ever thinking it might be any different with Saki when even his own father thinks he’s an annoying waste of space half the time.

“Senpai’s not like that,” he finds himself saying. She’s not. Saki-senpai’s _not_ a bad person. If only he hadn’t been so overeager… if only Junes could just disappear…

Beside him, Souji shifts uncomfortably. And from the corner of the room:

“It’s _so_ sad. I feel _so_ sorry for myself. Boo-hoo.”

Yosuke, Souji and Teddie all whip round. The person in the corner of the room, voice mocking and distorted – it’s _him_. A perfect replica but for the glowing yellow eyes.

“Wh-what?” he whispers. The other him bares his teeth in a grin.

“What’s going on?” Souji asks quietly, putting a hand on Yosuke’s shoulder.

“I don’t–“

Then, the other him begins spouting off awful things. _Terrible_ things. Things that, he can’t deny, have all passed through his head at least once. Yes – he _does_ hate Inaba. He _does_ act carefree to hide his insecurities. He _is_ so sick of this place he’d use his senpai’s death as an excuse to explore the TV, to maybe solidify his friendship with Souji.

But that’s the exact problem. Souji’s right there, listening to everything with a carefully neutral expression. And Yosuke _isn’t_ as bad as the other Yosuke’s trying to make him out to be, right?

“You’re not me!” he shouts.

It’s a poor mistake.

When he wakes up, Souji’s bent over and breathing heavily, the golf club that Yosuke had so jokingly handed him earlier hanging loose from one hand. Teddie’s dancing from foot to foot by the entrance of the liquor store, far away from both boys.

“What just happened?” Yosuke winces as he sits up.

Souji looks back at him, his expression relaxing. Yosuke can’t help but feel gratified by the open relief on Souji’s face. That’s when Yosuke notices that the other him is still there, standing just beyond Souji, looking considerably more subdued than before. He stiffens. It isn’t _gone_?

“Y-you’re not me,” he whispers, shaking his head.

Souji walks to him and offers a hand. “We all have something like that,” he says quietly. “There’s no need to worry. I’m not going to judge you, and I won’t tell anyone.”

“You don’t think I’m awful?”

Souji shakes his head. Yosuke, for the second time in as many days, takes Souji’s hand. It’s sort of clammy – evidence of the fight he’d just taken part in on his behalf.

Yosuke sighs and turns to the other him. Well, fine. If Souji’s going to look at him like that, all calm and encouraging, then he’d better get it over and done with.

When it’s all over, his Persona fading before his eyes and a ball of warmth settling in his chest, Souji says, “You really shouldn’t beat yourself up over any of that stuff, you know. I knew someone a lot like you.”

“Oh?”

“He was a wonderful friend,” Souji says softly. He’s no longer looking at Yosuke. Instead, he’s looking at the place where his shadow had stood. “A really good person.”

“Maybe I can be a good person too, someday,” Yosuke says bitterly, thinking of all the shit his shadow had said. Really, using Saki to try to become a hero? Has he fallen that far?

“You already are, I think,” Souji says, turning back to face him. They stare at each other. Yosuke’s voice is stuck in his throat – he wants to say something, protest maybe. But he can’t get any words out, can hardly even begin to formulate them. “I… hope we get along, alright?” Souji adds finally and despite the warmth of his words, Yosuke senses an underlying sadness there.

Yosuke smiles tiredly. “Yeah. Absolutely.”

* * *

 He knows Stranger’s been texting him, but he hasn’t checked his phone since yesterday afternoon. Even when he sat up until midnight waiting for the TV to flicker on, he ignored the occasional buzzing. When it got annoying, he stuffed it under his pillow.

Because Yosuke really doesn’t need Stranger. He has Souji now.

Souji, who smiles and clasps his hand firmly when Yosuke’s blathering on and on about how they can solve this mystery if they’re together. Souji, who walks right by his side all the way to school, quiet and serious but a comforting presence all the same. Souji, who’s seen all the awful parts of Yosuke and isn’t acting as if anything has changed. He appreciates it more than he cares to admit, that Souji hasn’t once treated him like he’s a joke.

During that afternoon at Junes, he realises he has the perfect opportunity to ask for Souji’s number. Okay, so sure, Yukiko potentially being in danger isn’t what he should call an opportunity. But still, it’s the perfect moment.

“We all need to watch the Midnight Channel again. Just in case,” he says firmly, and both Souji and Chie nod their agreement. “Hey, uh – what’s your cell number? I’ll call you when I watch it tonight. That way we won’t have to wait until tomorrow,” he adds to Souji, pulling out his phone. There’s no way he’ll be asking for Chie’s number again, after all. He sends her a teasing glare, but she’s not really paying attention. She’s examining the TV, prodding at the screen without any success. She just ends up putting her fingerprints all over it. Yosuke can’t help but feel glad he’s not in charge of cleaning around here.

“Give me your phone – I’ll enter it in,” Souji says, so Yosuke hands it over.

Souji taps in some numbers. But then his face changes, eyes widening. His skin goes pale and the hand holding the phone starts to tremble.

“Hey, what’s up, man? Are you alright?” Yosuke asks worriedly, taking a couple of steps forward.

Souji shakes his head wildly and says, “I’m okay. It’s just – um – my number’s already saved in your phone.”

“What?” Yosuke frowns. “That can’t be right. I don’t remember you ever giving me your number. Maybe it’s something the TV World did–“

“No, you don’t get it,” Souji says. The colour’s returning to his face. Now his cheeks are pink. “Here.” He holds the phone out towards Yosuke, who takes it. Souji’s entered a number into the phone. A drop-down has popped up with an identical number and the name of the contact right beneath it.

_Stranger Danger._

His initial instinct is to start laughing uncontrollably, but shock sets in quickly. Yosuke doesn’t know how he stays upright – his legs are suddenly shaking wildly, even worse than when he’d heard the news about Saki-senpai. He thinks he’s probably gone just as pale as Souji had been a few seconds ago.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” he says, his voice coming out all raspy and breathy, no substance to it at all.

Souji’s staring at him, opening and closing his mouth. Yosuke faintly notices that his fingers are balled into fists. He looks away very quickly. There’s something unbearable about looking at him.

“What’s going on, you two?” Chie asks, finally turning away from the TV and looking back and forth between them.

“I just – I just remembered – I –“ Yosuke takes a quick breath, trying to sort out his words. But he can’t think straight, let alone form a coherent sentence. “Gotta go!”

“Yosuke…!” Souji calls after him. His voice sounds pretty wretched. Yosuke doesn’t allow himself any space in his mind to care. He races out of the store, drags his headphones over his ears and flings himself onto his bike. He pedals as hard as he can, drowning in the repeated motion of his legs and in the throbbing tide of the melody. 

* * *

Yosuke has a lot of time to spare waiting for the Midnight Channel to come on, so he spends it finally thinking about Stranger – about Souji. Coming to terms with yet _another_ ridiculous, but very real, thing.

Should it have been obvious? No, Yosuke doesn’t think so. Souji hasn’t gone coo-coo over any cats yet, hasn’t cooked anything magical, hasn’t proved himself to be as incredibly boring as he claims to be. The only things that match up are that he’s a transfer student and that he’s a dude. Not to mention that there are things that don’t match at all. He’s _far_ from boring. Hell, he was the guy he talked back to King Moron! The guy whose Persona manifested without having to deal with some embarrassing shadow! If anything, Souji’s the coolest person Yosuke’s ever met.

It’s a total contrast to Stranger – Stranger who spent quiet nights alone with his books, who asked all those funny questions about friendship. But the more he thinks about it, the easier it is to visualise Souji in Stranger’s place, living Stranger’s life.

On the other hand, Yosuke’s probably made the worst impression on Souji possible, what with crashing his bike _twice_ , getting beaten up by Chie and the whole shadow thing.

He inhales shakily. Well, he can’t just hide in his room forever.

He goes to get his phone – after getting home, he'd flung it across the room onto the couch with no regard for what might happen if his aim had been even slightly off. There’s a _lot_ of unread texts there, every single one of them from Stranger. From Souji. The screen name – Stranger Danger – seems to mock him.

They begin from the previous night.

 **(19:03)** _I don’t think you’re being fair. I’ve never said anything about ‘forcing’ myself to talk to you. Perhaps there’s been something off, but can’t that be just as much your fault as mine?_

 **(19:06)** _Sorry. That didn’t come out right. Don’t read that._

 **(21:15)** _You’re important to me. But maybe it’s a good thing if we give each other some space to forge some connections in real life. Ever since you’ve been talking to some other people you’ve seemed happier, as far as I can tell._

 **(21:45)** _And it’s always hard to tell, you know._

 **(22:32)** _Okay, at this point it’s pretty obvious you’re ignoring me. Do you see what I mean? It ISN’T just me. I could’ve spent my night watching quiz shows with my cousin but now I’m stressed out because of a few offhanded words from you. Thanks._

 **(23:12)** _Fine, have it your way. I’m excited by what could be ahead of me in my new school. Have fun with that girl you like. I know how keen you are on her. There’s nothing much I can do for you anymore after all. I was right._

 **(23:49)** _Still no response. Okay. Thanks for everything._

Yosuke reads the texts several times, then visualises Souji saying it all to him, face stony, eyes cold. He realises after a while that he’s chewing the skin off his lips – he can taste blood. He forces himself to stop and continues to scroll down to the texts Stranger – Souji – sent today.

 **(17:18)** _I’m so sorry for everything I sent last night. I was… upset._

 **(20:59)** _I understand if you’re angry._

He just doesn’t know what to say. At all. His fingers hover over the keypad. Just then, the phone buzzes again.

 **(22:48)** _I don’t know what you’re feeling. I don’t know what I’m feeling. Please just say something though._

Yosuke bites his tongue to stop himself from chewing at his lips again, and finally manages a response.

 **(22:58)** just 2 check. bcus tbh im having a very hard time believing that such a ridiculous coincidence cud actually happen to me. this is souji seta im txting?

 **(23:00)** _Yes, Yosuke_

Seeing his name, his actual name, not _Wrono_ is enough to make Yosuke’s stomach drop. He can hear the slow pounding of his heart in his ears, listens to it as it picks up.

 **(23:03)** fuck. i still dont think i believe it

 **(23:05)** _Nor do I – although I did have a few moments where I felt I knew you. Especially when we were at Junes._

 **(23:06)** ah yes, corporate hell

 **(23:07)** _I like Junes. And so does my cousin, Nanako._

 **(23:09)** try tellin that to the locals. theyll shoot u

This isn’t the conversation they need, Yosuke realises. They’re just going through the motions. Not getting anywhere at all.

 **(23:15)** _You know, I’ve been thinking. Maybe it’s why I was so eager to be your friend, because you felt familiar._

But with that, they’re quite suddenly back on track. _Why is it so much more awkward to discuss the important stuff?_

 **(23:18)** u rly do say a lot more when ur txting than u do irl

 **(23:20)** but i mean REALLY? eager 2 b MY friend? y wud u even want 2 come near me after ive so spectacularly displayed wat a giant loser i am? u saw my shadow

 **(23:22)** _I don’t understand. You’ve already told me basically everything the shadow said through texts. Don’t you remember? I said you – Wrono – are a good person. And like I said – we all have stuff about ourselves we want to hide. I already knew those things about you, and you know them about me._

Yosuke remembers that. He also remembers _exactly_ the way Souji had phrased it – he’d said, “he was a wonderful friend.” At the time, Yosuke had assumed it was just someone Souji had fallen out of contact with, but now…

Even then, Souji – Stranger – had given up.

But he hardly wants to go into that right now. He doesn’t want to put himself into even worse a mood. Instead, he chooses to focus on the other point Souji had made.

 **(23:25)** i ‘know’ ur insecurities, yet ur actually a lot cooler than u always made urself out to be

 **(23:25)** _How??_

 **(23:27)** u talk back to king moron, ur all strong and stoic and reliable, u randomly can use persona

 **(23:33)** _I only spoke back to King Moron because I was trying to say what I thought you’d want me to say if someone spoke to me like that. And because I wanted to make enough of an impression to make a friend, because YOU showed me how valuable it could be. As for stoic, that’s just because I’m quiet and poor at holding conversations. It’s not me trying to be cool. And I honestly am not sure why I have a persona, but so do you now. Is that enough of an explanation? I would’ve thought you’d have realised all that._

 **(23:35)** ok, sure

 **(23:38)** so now alls gud bcus i can b ur real, tangible friend uve been wanting to replace wrono with all this time?

Yosuke lets out a sharp breath. It’s possibly the hardest text he’s ever sent, as passive-aggressive as it is. He hates doing this, _hates_ it, would almost rather just sweep it all under the rug and say it’s all totally okay, that Souji’s stiff and infrequent replies had never caused him any grief. But the truth is, he’s been unhappy with Stranger – Souji – for months now. And things can never be right if he tries to hide his real feelings – right?

He taps an anxious beat into the surface of the floor with a single foot as he waits. _Please don’t hate me._

_…I don’t want to hate you._

Finally, after what feels like hours, Souji’s response pops up. He’s surprised when he realises it’s only been three minutes.

 **(23:41)** _Okay, wait. I’m sorry I couldn’t reply much in the past few months. I was actually busy, you know. I travelled back and forth between several places with my parents. I got sick. I know you’ve been holding it against me, and I’m sorry. I never wanted to make things awkward._

 **(23:45)** well u certainly succeeded anyway. u made it awkward the moment u started overthinking everything and making it super clear how fragile you think our relationship is, then u made it worse by never talking 2 me

 **(23:50)** _Okay, I GET it. But don’t you see? That’s my issue. I read way too deeply into everything. I overanalyse every single facet of my life and make myself miserable. That’s why I’m trying to change. You can accept me despite how stupid I can be, can’t you?_

Yosuke blinks and reads back through the conversation. _Oh god, I always make a prat of myself when I’m exhausted, don’t I?_

 **(23:53)** hey, i never said i didnt accept u. sorry if im coming off wrong over txt

After sending that, he goes to dial Souji’s number. It’s close enough to midnight, after all.

He picks up after a single ring. “Yosuke?” comes the hesitant voice on the other end of the line. With his phone’s call quality as it is, it’s hard to recognise Souji’s voice, but it’s definitely him.

Yosuke takes a deep breath. “Souji. I’m sorry. I’m being a piece of shit to you, even if, uh, I’m still sort of mad. Sorry.”

“I don’t think so,” is Souji’s reply, slow and measured. “I knew what I was doing, Yosuke. Like you said, I was overthinking it. Trying to decipher the worth of a best friend who I didn’t think I could ever meet and pushing you further and further away in the process.”

“You–“

“No, please hear me out,” Souji presses, and it’s so weird to hear Souji interrupt him that Yosuke just makes a noise of assent and settles back against his couch to listen.  “I could’ve replied more. It’s not like I couldn’t text you on car trips, or while eating lunch, or – you know. Whenever. You’re completely right to resent me. I just – I constantly had these thoughts. Somedays I thought, if I keep talking to you I’ll distance myself further and further from reality until you’re all I have. And then I’d think about – and this will sound awful now, and I’m so sorry – how you had your Senpai, who was clearly much better for you than I could be. You seem to have this image of me as strong, but I was jealous of her. Because she could actually speak to you in real life and she had so much of your attention. So that’s why. I know it was terrible of me.”

Yosuke stays silent for a long moment, hand pressed over his mouth. “You can really talk a lot if you put your mind to it, huh?” he says, and it’s just his initial reaction and it’s a stupid one and he wishes he could take it back the moment he says it. Because that’s not what’s important. “Sorry, that’s not what I wanted to say,” he adds hurriedly. “Me and my big mouth, huh? Um… wow. I feel terrible for harassing you so much. Sorry. But the only reason I was so persistent is because you matter, you know? It wasn’t just Saki-senpai who reassured me when I most needed it. The only reason I got so frustrated and snippy with you was because I was – well. Scared of losing you.”

His face is heating up – he’s sort of regretting calling Souji now. He’s just glad he doesn’t have to say this sappy stuff in person, because he’d probably find it impossible to look Souji in the eye. Even hearing Souji’s quiet breathing on the other end of the line is enough to unnerve him.

“I’m sorry,” Souji whispers.

Yosuke, quite suddenly, is _relieved_. If Souji is Stranger, and Stranger is Souji… doesn’t that make everything easier? If they can just get past this bump in the road, if Yosuke can forget all his stupid insecurities, aren’t they really incredibly _lucky_?

He doesn’t remember wishing on any shooting stars. Then what was it, that brought Stranger practically to his doorstep? Fate? He snorts, but he’s smiling, eyes falling shut.

“Just… don’t worry about it,” Yosuke says finally. “For now-“

The TV flickers on with a burst of static.

* * *

 A trivial distance away, Souji slips the covers high over his chin as he settles into his futon. He leaves the phone right by his head, just in case. Just in case. He feels a bit shaky, a bit sick. A bit terrified that he’s ruined it all.

He’s been forgiven, apparently, maybe. Not _definitely_ , Yosuke never said it aloud, but it was implicit in the gentling of his tone, right? Souji had explained himself well, right?

He rolls over and tries to will the queasiness in his stomach away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *enthusiastic waving* I'M ALIVE! and here's another chapter, earlier than i expected it to be. your comments and messages have been as motivating as ever.
> 
> that being said, the first week of uni is hardly an indication of how busy things are going to be for the next few weeks. so thank you all for supporting me in my real life endeavours as well as my fic endeavours.


	13. Chapter 13

**April**

Yosuke arrives at the foodcourt, then Souji, and their eyes meet and it’s _odd_. It’s so odd. Like a genie has reached into his phone and produced a human being from it. Souji gives a wavering smile and Yosuke lifts a hand and waves it about. It feels like he’s waving a dead fish.

In all his imagined scenarios wherein he met Stranger, it had been far less awkward than this.

And now, he can’t help but look at Souji in a totally new way. Of _course_ he has a dorky haircut and of _course_ it suits him well. Of course he’s just that bit taller than Yosuke, like he’d said that night he asked all those questions. Of course he has those eyes, and that nose, those hands, that mouth – he’s Stranger, he’s Souji, and it’s weird but it’s right.

“Hello,” Souji says quietly, pulling up the seat next to Yosuke, as if any of the other seats weren’t even viable choices. _Come on, usually dudes don’t sit so close,_ Yosuke thinks, but he doesn’t say anything. “Where’s Chie?” he goes on. “I would’ve thought she’d be the first to arrive.”

“I’ve got no idea,” Yosuke says with a shrug.

Souji shifts the chair a little so they’re angling towards each other. Souji’s leg is about two millimetres away from Yosuke’s and he’s hyperaware of it, ready to shift away if need be. He quickly realises, however, that it’s not Souji’s leg he needs to worry about. No, he should be more concerned about the way the other boy stares, those stony grey eyes boring into him.

“Um…?” Yosuke says finally, when he can’t take it anymore. Souji starts, as if he’d totally zoned out. Hey, maybe that’s why he stared at Yosuke for so long. Yosuke’s done that before – accidentally zoned out while looking in someone’s direction and totally freaked them out.

“Sorry,” Souji says, ducking his head. “It’s just… I can’t believe that this is real. That’s you, right there. I’d entertained the possibility, sure, but what are the chances?”

Yosuke’s cheeks heat and he averts his eyes. He kind of wants to apologise, for some reason. _Yeah, this is me. Disappointing old me._

Souji shakes his head disbelievingly. But before they can say anything else, Chie sprints up, a bundle of supplies in her arms. And they’re quite suddenly too busy to talk about it anymore, and they remain too busy for the next few days as they make trip after trip into the TV, and then it reaches the point where Yosuke forgets that things are weird – at least while they’re in that world. Fighting shadows with someone kind of makes it that way. Yosuke knows the way Souji stands, the way he moves and breathes, how to coordinate their rhythms so battles go smoothly.

Going into the TV soon becomes something Yosuke looks forward to. It’s exhilarating, pounding along right behind Souji and leaping as one into battles. He finally has a purpose, and even though it should be scary with so much at risk, he’s happier than ever.

“You’re incredible,” Souji says one day. They’re near the top of the dungeon – or so Teddie says. Yosuke had just taken out a shadow in one hit with a well-placed gust of wind.

“Huh?” Yosuke says, because it’s kind of rare for them to comment on each other like that unless it's to make suggestions.

“Yeah, why’s that?” Chie puts in, perhaps annoyed she’s not the one being complimented by their leader.

“Oh, it’s just…” Souji suddenly looks flustered. “You have your music going at full volume yet you’re so focussed. You always get the first hit.”

“That’s true,” Chie nods. “I never thought you were that athletic, Yosuke-kun, but I’ll give it to you. You’re fast.”

“I’m not that good,” Yosuke protests. “I keep nearly dropping my kunai on my foot.”

“Well, no, you’re not perfect,” Chie says, sticking her tongue out. “C’mon, let’s get moving!”

Souji just gives Yosuke a significant look – _what’s that supposed to mean, Souji?_ – and follows her.

* * *

Every day spent in Yukiko’s castle leaves Yosuke far too tired to even think about doing anything but scoffing his dinner and passing out on his bed, but the days in between – when Souji insists that they need to keep up with their actual lives – are… _odd_. Yosuke spends half the time in class staring at the back of Souji’s head. He never turns around. He always looks like he’s working hard.

The one time he _does_ turn is all kinds of awkward. Someone behind Yosuke is stammering through a reading King Moron asked him to do and Souji shifts in his chair so he can look. Only, they end up looking straight at each other. They both rush to smile at each other and then Yosuke looks at his desk and Souji turns back around.

It doesn’t happen again.

They don’t text much, either. And when they do, it’s very different from what it used to be. It’s not the banter they had in those early months, each of them clamouring to reply mere seconds after the other. It’s not the stilted thing of February and March. It’s, ‘ _Got you a new set of knives. Those should work better for you_ ,’ or, ‘hey man, weather said rain 2mro but only passing showers. no need 2 worry rite?’

Despite the fact that Yosuke had thought things had been worked out between them, they just can’t seem to return so easily to anything other than what’s _necessary_. They can’t ignore Yukiko’s life being at stake, but apparently they can ignore the fact that, hey, aren’t they _friends_?

Yosuke doesn’t like it at all. But he never knows what to say. It could be as easy as, ‘king moron was a real horror 2day’. It could be ‘been cooking lately?’ or it could be ‘how r u?’ or… well. He could say anything. But there’s absolutely nothing that feels _natural_ , like it’s what he _should_ say.

He’s thinking about this, staring at the ceiling, when quite suddenly, his phone goes off. The shrill ringtone gives him quite a shock, but he has enough sense to check the caller before he picks up. It’s Stranger. Souji.

“Hey, what’s up?” It’s got to be something about Yukiko. Usually he just texts, though, so-

“Hi. Um…” Souji trails off. Yosuke stays silent. “Is it alright if I come over?”

“Wh- _what_?”

“I know it’s kind of late,” Souji goes on in a hurry and yeah, no kidding, it’s _eight_. “It doesn’t have to be for long, though. I just… wanted to clear something up.”

“Um. Yeah, sure. Just hold on while I check with my parents.”

“Mm.”

So Yosuke does, mumbling something about a group project at school. His mum looks pleased and agrees that sure, his friend can stay as long as he likes, as long as they’re being productive.

That’s how Souji ends up in his room at eight thirty at night, seating himself rather cautiously on the couch. Yosuke just stands, arms folded and determinedly staring at his CD collection.

“I told you before, right?” Souji says finally. He’s watching Yosuke intently – Yosuke can see it out of the corner of his eye. “I never really had friends.”

“Something like that.”

“My parents didn’t expect that out of me. All they cared about were my grades. They never asked if I was getting along with everyone at school. There was no point. We always ended up moving in a few months anyway. It’s not like I couldn’t _talk_ to people. But I never felt that they mattered to me.” Souji crosses his own arms. Now they’re both doing it. Yosuke uncrosses his, letting them hang loose by his sides.

“You said I was your best friend, though,” Yosuke says quietly, after a brief hesitation.

“Yes. You… still are, if that’s okay.” Souji is still watching him. Yosuke presses his lips together and nods. Of course it’s okay. It’s what he’s been waiting to hear.

“Honestly, hearing about how everything was going better for you… it confused me. I thought, I’ve got to be ready for the day he doesn’t need me anymore.” Souji’s words are halting. Yosuke finally turns to him, sits down next to him so he’s not looming over him.

“Souji, honestly, just don’t worry about it! I forgive you! You don’t have to…”

“Didn’t we say the good thing about our friendship was the honesty? Right at the start?”

 _But that was different_ , Yosuke thinks desperately. _That was when all we had was texting_. But as Souji looks at him, eyes calm despite the nervousness in his voice, Yosuke understands. Souji doesn’t want to treat this new friendship they have as anything separate from what it used to be. Doesn’t want to distinguish Stranger and Wrono from Souji and Yosuke. And that’s okay. It’s _good_.

“I made a mistake. A lot of mistakes. I could’ve fixed things anytime, but I just let the situation get worse and worse. I never _wanted_ to stop being friends with you, you know. I’ve just always sort of been good at ignoring my feelings.”

Yosuke reaches out for Souji’s wrist. Souji lets him, unfolding his arms. “I’m not going to deny that it made me feel like shit. I kept wondering what I had done wrong, or if I was really just that repulsive-“

“You’re _not_ ,” Souji interrupts insistently. Yosuke smiles wryly, looking at the floor.

“I’m trying not to be.” He thinks of Saki. He’d been a pain in the ass to her. She’d smiled so kindly to him, but he’d just been a thorn in her side. “I just… I’m okay with it, alright? I get that you had a lot to work through. We _did_ talk for months, after all. I’m not entirely clueless about you. And maybe I should’ve thought about that before jumping to conclusions, but you know me. I’m not that smart. Seeing you here now, a real person, that… kind of makes it easier to understand.”

It does. Feeling Souji’s wrist tremor ever so slightly in Yosuke’s hold is sort of comforting. Souji never _did_ hate him. Souji _does_ regret making things so awkward. That’s more than enough for Yosuke to know he can get over it.

“Just for the record,” Yosuke says finally, breaking the silence that’s fallen between them. “You saw some of the worst of me and you still stayed by my side. That’s… that’s really something. I couldn’t ask for a better partner.”

“Partner… like in battle?” Souji says slowly.

“Yeah, sure,” Yosuke shrugs. He guesses that’s sort of what he meant. Probably. It’s not like he always thinks through exactly what he’s trying to say. “Anyway, uh, is your cousin going to be alright? Nanako-chan, right?”

Souji stands at that, extracting himself from Yosuke’s grip. Damn, he totally forgot he’d been holding onto Souji’s wrist. He’d held on for an embarrassingly long time, come to think of it. “Nanako’s used to being by herself,” Souji says as Yosuke flushes and sits on his hands before he can do anything else embarrassing. “But I’d better head back.”

“Oh, that’s cool. I’ll see you tomorrow, then?”

“Yeah. I think we’ll go into the TV World after school.”

And that’s that. Souji lets himself out and Yosuke lies on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He feels a little better.

* * *

They save Yukiko that day. The next day, things are a little different. After watching Souji rush fearlessly into hundreds of battles with Shadows, Yosuke doesn’t know what to make of the quieter, more hesitant Souji he finds at school the next morning.

“Hey,” Yosuke grins as he enters the classroom and finds Souji already at his desk, hands folded in front of him and staring blankly at the board. They’re both pretty early – only a few others have arrived.

“Oh – Yosuke,” Souji says, sitting up a little straighter. “Hello. How are you?”

“So formal all of a sudden.” Yosuke tugs his earphones down to sit more comfortably around his neck. “I’m good. Tired, but you know – we’ve done something great. We don’t have to worry about Yukiko-san.”

“You should rest more,” Souji says, frowning. As Yosuke sits down and starts unpacking his books, Souji turns in his seat. “You should’ve taken a day off if you’re not feeling well.”

“Nah, I’m fine. Nothing like what Yukiko-san must be feeling, right?”

Souji just continues to frown.

“C’mon man, don’t look so sour. What do they say? Turn that frown upside down!” Yosuke leans forward and prods Souji in the shoulder. He doesn’t exactly smile, but his face does relax, if only imperceptibly.

“Why are you treating me so nicely?” Souji says suddenly, in an undertone.

“Wha – huh?”

“You should… ignore me or something. Like I did to you. Fair’s fair.”

Yosuke gapes at Souji. “Dude – didn’t we talk about this the other night? That’s not how I do things. I don’t want to ignore you. I want…” He glances around the classroom. A few more people have arrived, but no one’s looking at them. “I want to – maybe – hang out with you? Like, after school sometime. Now that we don’t have to worry about the TV.”

Souji’s fingers, curled around the back of the chair, clench and unclench. “I get that you _had_ to talk to me while Yukiko was in danger, but now… how are you not angry?”

Yosuke laughs and scratches the back of his head. “I think you’re blowing things out of proportion. We’re friends, right? Friends shouldn’t be petty like that. Besides, I told you. I forgive you. Wasn’t that clear enough?”

Souji stares at Yosuke for what feels like a long time, his face carefully neutral. “Let’s grab some steak after school,” he says finally. “It’ll be on me. You show me the best place.”

“Sure!” Yosuke says straightaway, startled by the flicker of nervousness in his gut. No reason to be nervous. He just spent weeks in a _TV_ with this guy. Not to mention all those months beforehand texting.

“Oh, and…” Souji glances sideways for a second. The classroom’s considerably fuller now. Chie’s walking through the door, stifling a yawn. “I made a boxed lunch, yesterday. There’s enough for two. Do you want…?” He trails off, and Yosuke can’t help but lean forward.

“Are you inviting me to try something _you_ made?” he says in hushed tones. Souji nods. “ _Hell_ yes. I’m there.”

“Then we’ll go to the roof,” Souji decides, and before Yosuke can tell him that’s sort of a place for people who want privacy, King Moron steps into the classroom. Oh well. If Souji wants the roof, he can have the roof.

* * *

They find the roof empty, which is pretty convenient. Souji chooses a spot by the chain-link fence and pulls a box out of his bag, setting it down next to him.

“This is amazing,” Yosuke says breathlessly, sitting down on the other side of the box.

“It’s only broiled fish,” Souji says quickly, taking the lid off and setting it aside. “I was just using the ingredients Nanako got from Junes, so you know–“

“Wow, what the hell! It looks just as good as all the stuff you sent me photos of,” Yosuke interrupts, leaning down to peer at the food. Sure, it’s ‘just’ fish, but it looks as though it’s been cooked perfectly, cut into even slices with sprinklings of herbs on top and vegetables tucked into the edges of the box. “Oh my god. Can I do something?” When Souji tips his head questioningly, Yosuke grins. “Turn around. Just for a second.”

So Souji does, and Yosuke, thinking he’s pretty damn clever, takes out his phone and snaps a photo of the box and its contents. Moments later, Souji’s phone vibrates.

“Yosuke, was that–?” Souji pulls out his phone. His eyes widen when he sees what Yosuke’s sent. “Isn’t this just…?”

“Finally, I can send you photos of delicious food. I feel like a real connoisseur now!”

If Yosuke had looked carefully, he would have noticed Souji’s lips relax into a smile that could only be called fond. But he’s too busy deciding which angle to attack the fish from, prodding at it excitedly with his chopsticks, that he doesn’t see it at all.

* * *

“Ah, that was delicious! You sure you don’t want any bread?” Yosuke waves the Junes brand stuff in Souji’s face. He simply shakes his head, looking faintly amused.

“Actually, can I ask a favour?” Souji says.

“Yeah, sure.” Yosuke tears a bit of the loaf off with his teeth, then wonders if Souji would prefer if he ate more politely. Oh well. This is who he is.

“Um… I was thinking.” Souji’s fingers, which are gripping the fabric of his trousers, tighten a little. “To make this whole thing less surreal, maybe I could get a picture of you? To use as the contact picture?”

Yosuke blinks. “I’m not very good at posing,” he says finally, cautiously.

“You don’t need to pose. I just want a photo of your face. I want to change your contact name to Yosuke Hanamura, not, you know, Wrong Number. And it’d be nice to have a photo there, not just a grey silhouette.”

Yosuke considers this. “Well, okay. But I have to approve the photo, alright? Don’t use a photo of me zoning out or sleeping like my old friends did.”

“Did they really do that?”

“Yeah. I look real dopey in all the pictures they got of me.” Yosuke sighs long-sufferingly. “I mean, okay, I didn’t care that much. I just don’t want _you_ to associate all my texts with me pulling some dumb face.” As soon as he says this, he stops to think. _Wait, what did I mean by that?_

But Souji presses ahead, giving Yosuke no time to regret his choice of words. “Well, I’ll show you the picture and you can tell me if it’s okay. Come on, turn this way.”

“Wait – can I get one of you too, then?” Yosuke says as he shuffles around, trying not to look too stiff.

“Of course,” Souji says distractedly, opening up the application for his phone camera. He aims it at Yosuke, whose shoulders tense up against his will the moment he sees the tiny camera on the outside of the phone.

“Um – is this alright? Should I smile? Should I, uh, pose or something?” He grits his teeth and pulls his lips back. That’s how you’re supposed to smile, right?

“Why are you making that face, Yosuke?” Souji mutters, frowning at what he’s seeing on the phone screen. _Oh, wait, that’s me he’s seeing on the phone screen._ Yosuke can’t help it. His face starts heating up. Being in a photo has never been this hard.

“Um. Sorry. I’m not very photogenic,” Yosuke sighs, rolling his shoulders and trying to relax his face.

“What do you call a cat guilty of a crime?” Souji says softly.

“Huh?”

“The _purr_ petrator,” Souji finishes, his lips twitching.

Yosuke considers this for a second, then laughs disbelievingly. “What was that? A pun? It was so bad, oh my god. You really are a big dork.”

“This one. I’m going to use this one.” Souji turns the phone to face him. Yosuke sees a photo of himself there, a square selection box already positioned perfectly over his head. He’s mid-laugh, his gaze not _quite_ meeting the camera – he’s probably looking at Souji. His cheeks are a little flushed. He looks… delighted. Not exactly the face he thought he’d made at Souji’s dumb joke. He looks… well, the way he looks make him want to flush even more. But it’s not a bad photo. The blue sky framing his head is pretty nice and he’s not closing his eyes or anything…

“Okay,” he says, turning away a little bit. “You can. Use it, I mean.”

“Great!” Souji takes the phone back and stares at the screen for a moment. “I could be a photographer,” he says finally, looking up at Yosuke. “What do you think?”

“As long as I don’t have to be your model.” Yosuke grabs his bread and takes a giant bite. There, hopefully that’ll take his mind off of the way Souji rolled the ‘r’ in _purrpetrator._ Once he’s finished it, he pulls his phone out of his pocket. Souji’s still doing something on his own phone – Yosuke can’t see what, because Souji’s angled it away. It looks like he’s reading, or something – he’s just staring at the screen. “Hey, you promised me a contact pic too. C’mon. Let’s see your best pose.”

“Huh? Oh.” Souji puts his phone aside and turns to Yosuke with his usual blank expression. “Go on, then.”

“Oh, come on. After all you put me through, I want at least a smile!”

Souji gives Yosuke one of those closed-mouthed smiles that look almost as neutral as his resting face.

“Ugh, but I can’t _think_ of any cat jokes,” Yosuke laments, giving Souji a pouty look over the top of his phone. Souji looks faintly distressed.

“I’m not really good at smiling,” he says.

“What? Yes you are. I’ve seen you smile plenty,” Yosuke says accusingly.

“Have you…?”

“Yeah. Like in class today when I said that really stupid answer, or when I do a good job killing a shadow, you know, stuff like that.”

Souji frowns at the ground.

“Hey, how about this. When we hang out after school today, I’ll take you by the riverbank. There’s usually some stray cats there, if you know where to look.”

Souji looks up. “Really?”

“Yeah. I wouldn’t lie to you. Not about cats, anyway,” Yosuke adds with a roll of his eyes.

“Why do you know where to look for cats?” Souji asks as he faces the camera again.

“I may have gone looking. Way back when you first revealed your cat obsession to me. I was trying to get a good pic of a cat looking ugly to tease you, but it never happened,” Yosuke says absent-mindedly, flicking through some options on his phone. He never noticed before, but he has a bunch of silly filters. He tries one of the distortion ones and immediately bursts out laughing at the Souji on the screen, who has a giant nose and tiny eyes.

“What are you laughing at?” Souji asks warily.

“I just turned on an option on my phone – oh my god – look at this!” Yosuke’s breathless from laughing, his eyes tearing up a little. He shows Souji the giant-nosed version of him. Souji just screws his nose up a little bit.

“Are you going to use that?”

“If you don’t give me your best smile, then yes.” Yosuke waves the phone in front of Souji’s face and gives his best evil cackle.

“Okay, okay. I’ll try again.” Souji takes a long breath and closes his eyes, as if meditating. Then he slowly opens his eyes. His lips curl up in what Yosuke can only describe as a smirk. A nonchalant, lazy sort of smirk, eyes lidded just a little bit.

Yosuke snaps the photo and saves it. Then he stares at his phone. Where, oh _where_ , did Souji learn to make that face? He stares a little more.

“Is it okay?” Souji asks from behind the phone, sounding concerned.

“Um – yeah! It’s great!” Yosuke says, flashing a thumbs up at him. It _is_ great. Too great. He can’t leave it like this, though. He’ll feel embarrassed every time he looks at it – and not because it’s a bad photo. Not at all. After some deliberation, he adds some sparkle stickers around Souji’s head. There, he looks a little more innocent now. Satisfied with it, Yosuke saves it as the contact picture for Stranger Danger and shoves the phone straight back into his pocket.

He can change the name later.

* * *

The steak at Souzai Daigaku is brilliant. Yosuke wonders if it’s possible to eat too much good food in a single day, but decides that it’s definitely not.

“So, want to go down by the riverbed? We might see some stray cats, if we’re lucky,” Yosuke says, and Souji’s in the middle of nodding his assent when a couple of housewives out on a stroll go past, glancing briefly at the two boys as they go.

“That’s the Junes boy, isn’t it?”

“Isn’t he ashamed to be seen in the Central Shopping District?”

Yosuke tries not to let his smile fall. Tries to pretend he didn’t hear anything. Souji, abruptly, stands up. Yosuke doesn’t realise what he’s doing until he starts going after the two women, powerwalking so he can catch up.

“Souji, wait!” He leaps up in pursuit and grabs Souji’s arm before he can catch up. Neither of the women even notice. “You can’t just – dude!”

“Why not?” he frowns. “They made a really rude comment. I just wanted to tell them not to say things like that.”

“It really doesn’t matter, okay?” Yosuke chuckles, trying to prove that all’s well. “I’m used to it, after all. And it’s not like they don’t have a reason to resent Junes.”

“But none of that’s _your_ fault.”

“I’ve been trying to say that for months now, but I’ve come to realise that it’s only natural for people to only think about themselves. Come on. Let’s just go.”

They don’t find any cats that day, and Souji remains subdued until they part ways, Yosuke promising to go looking again with him.

* * *

**(20:23)** _You should have let me talk to them._

Yosuke almost falls off his desk chair in his haste to read the text, then almost drops the phone in his rush to reply. He can’t believe Souji’s still thinking about that. Yosuke’s long put it out of his mind.

 **(20:24)** pls just let it go

 **(20:26)** _Why? If you were never exaggerating in all your texts, this sort of thing happens way too often and has been going on for way too long._

 **(20:26)** its just how this town is ok? they gossip and point fingers

 **(20:27)** _Are you saying it’s fine for people to always stay the same? For mindsets to remain forever consistent? Where would the world be if people weren’t willing to open their minds and consider new ways of thinking?_

Yosuke isn’t prepared for just how passionate Souji seems. He doesn’t quite know what to think.

 **(20:28)** argh idk. just dont get urself in any trouble for my sake ok? ur well-liked now so i dont want 2 go 2 school 2mro and hear rumours abt souji seta being a junes sympathiser or sumthing

 **(20:30)** _It wouldn’t be a lie. I do like Junes. It’s just a store, for crying out loud, not hell on earth. Competition among stores isn’t unusual._

 **(20:31)** maybe so but this is INABA

 **(20:34)** _Is it really so wrong for me to want to defend you, now that I finally can?!_

That puts Yosuke at a loss for words. He stares at the tiny, square icon of Souji’s face and an odd thrill goes through him, making him feel a little bit nervous. Scared he’s getting in too deep, too fast.

 **(20:36)** no. im glad, really. but crap about junes is up 2 my family 2 handle. i mean wat if u talking 2 those women reflected badly on me? id never hear the end of it from dad

 **(20:37)** _Sorry._

 **(20:37)** _I hate this._

Yosuke bites his lip. He never meant to make Souji unhappy. This was supposed to be a great year for him.

 **(20:39)** im glad ur here tho u no?

 **(20:39)** _Me too._

* * *

In a tiny room in a nearby house, Souji sets his mobile aside and tries, desperately, to focus on the maths problem in front of him. Minutes later, he’s dragging the phone back in front of him and flicking through the photos he took at school today, a progression of a boy with dyed brown hair going through a range of emotions and finally ending on the brightest laugh Souji’s ever seen.

He stares at the photo, finger hovering over the screen, and thinks of the way Yosuke’s smile had faded the moment those two women had gone past, wonders how he can possibly bring it back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gosh, it's been a while! you can blame university. it's hard to get into the right mindset to work on fic when i'm behind on physics problems. ugh.
> 
> i hope you're all well and that you've enjoyed this chapter! it came out unexpectedly long. hopefully that makes up for the wait.


	14. Chapter 14

**May**

Yosuke’d sensed it from the moment Souji had spoken back to King Moron, but he’s the type to get along with basically everyone. He already has a reputation as a great listener and Yosuke hasn’t heard a single bad word about him. Even Chie, who rags on Yosuke so much, seems keen to hang out with Souji. Apparently they practice fighting moves. Hell, the way things are going, Souji’s probably going to pass the Amagi Challenge with flying colours and ascend to some godly status far beyond Yosuke’s reach.

Thankfully, despite his popularity, Souji’s surprisingly loyal to Yosuke. On days where they’re both free – which are pretty rare, since Souji’s joined _two_ clubs and Yosuke can be pretty busy with work – Souji always sets time aside for him. They don’t really do much other than grab food and prowl up and down the floodplain in search of cats, but it’s nice.

And then there’s the admittedly rather silly habit they’ve gotten into – texting during homeroom, and sometimes even in the middle of class.

Like today. King Moron’s droning on and on about the many deficiencies of today’s youth, seeming far too engrossed in the sound of his own voice to notice what his students are doing. Yosuke, rolling his eyes, digs his phone out of his pocket and sends:

 **(08:34)** wish sum1 wud tell morooka about HIS deficiencies. u up 2 it?

Because he’s watching so carefully, he sees Souji slide his phone out onto his lap. They’ve both perfected the art of texting subtly. Souji’s head doesn’t even move – it looks to Yosuke like he’s still staring straight ahead.

 **(08:35)** _I don’t want to risk my life. I know better now._

 **(08:35)** ah so ur young and carefree days are over

 **(08:36)** _I’m afraid so. By the way, what are you doing?_

What Yosuke’s doing is leaning back in his seat and stretching his legs out so far that they reach the back of Souji’s chair. Without realising, he’s been lightly tapping the beat of the song that’s stuck in his head on the legs of the chair.

 **(08:37)** haha is it annoying?

 **(08:38)** _A little bit distracting, maybe, but I don’t think I’m missing much of importance._

 **(08:39)** shud i stop?

Suddenly, Yosuke feels Souji pushing the chair back ever so slightly. Another leg hooks around his. He glances back mischievously at Yosuke, whose own leg is now trapped. No one else in the class seems to notice any of this. Chie might’ve, but she’s passing notes with Yukiko. Far less subtle than texting, Yosuke thinks.

 **(08:40)** _Got you!_

 **(08:41)** ur rite, u caught me gud

 **(08:42)** r u demanding ransom? wats ur price?

 **(08:43)** _For your leg? Yosuke’s nice long leg? 1 million yen._

 **(08:44)** wtf?! i think id rather just chop it off

 **(08:44)** will it b so nice once its just a leg and im an amputee?

 **(08:45)** _Ah, no. Just a chopped off leg might not be so great._

 **(08:45)** y did this get so gruesome again?

 **(08:46)** _Your fault_.

Souji’s had their ankles locked around each other for so long now that Yosuke’s leg is beginning to ache with the effort of keeping it stretched out. Deftly, he extracts his foot and crows silently to himself in triumph.

 **(08:46)** luks lyk theres no need 4 me 2 pay ransom now!

 **(08:47)** _I’ll think of something else. Mark my words._

But not long later, class begins. Souji, as Yosuke has become accustomed to, buckles down and listens intently to the teacher, jotting down notes and looking every part the perfect student. Yosuke just stares at his back, at the strands of hair that disappear behind the popped collar. Thinking about it now, he doesn’t think he’s ever seen Souji’s neck.

“Do you have an answer for me, Hanamura-kun?”

 _Oh, god._ Yosuke shoots to his feet. It’s a reflex, one that he thinks distracts the teacher, if only for a moment, from the fact that he has no idea what she just said.

“The refraction of light,” Souji whispers.

“Yes! Uh, that would be the refraction of light!” Yosuke practically shouts. The teacher looks mildly impressed.

 **(09:46)** u saved my ass again, thx!!

There’s no reply, but Souji turns his head ever so slightly towards Yosuke and nods.

It’s incredible, that this exchange is even happening, Yosuke thinks. The guy in front of him – that’s Stranger. It’s Souji. He’s still not quite sure he can believe it. He kind of wants to stretch out a hand and splay it against that back, just to reassure himself, but how weird would that look to everyone else? There are better places to do stuff like that.

…Not that Yosuke really _wants_ to touch Souji, that is. It’s like when people pinch themselves to make sure they’re not dreaming. It’s that sort of thing.

* * *

Soon after Yukiko’s recovered from her experience in the TV, they decide that it’s great idea to head to Junes for lunch and just hang out as a team. Well, Yosuke doesn’t decide this – it was probably Souji’s idea originally. Yosuke’s privately incredulous that he’s going to be hanging out with Yukiko, although after seeing her shadow he finds the idea of looking at her romantically sort of off-putting. It’s not that he doesn’t _like_ her. It’s more that she’s become more real to him, rather than the ethereal beauty he’d always admired from afar.

They gather at the usual table, having met up at the entrance. Yosuke sits down first – he’s been doing errands all day for his mum, pedalling all over Inaba on his trash bike, so his legs are pretty sore – and Yukiko sits a seat away from him, fanning herself. Yeah, she’s still beautiful. But she’s _Yukiko_ , not some challenge to pass.

Chie makes to sit down in between the two of them, but suddenly Souji’s there, slipping into the seat before Chie can so much as touch it. Everyone gives him an odd look, and he either pretends not to notice or genuinely just doesn’t see them. Chie just ends up shrugging and taking the seat on Yukiko’s other side, so that they all end up sitting unnecessarily close together with several spare chairs in between Yosuke and Chie.

Yosuke doesn’t bother commenting. They’re a bit of a weird team.

“Yosuke, I’ll get you a drink,” Souji says after a moment of silence. “What do you want?”

“Oh, uh. TaP, please,” Yosuke says with a smile. “Here, I have some money – wait, Partner, take my money!”

But Souji just heads off towards the vending machine without so much as a backwards look.

“I guess that means he’s not getting us anything?” Yukiko says, sounding doubtful.

“We girls can fend for ourselves, unlike Yosuke!” Chie proclaims, slamming a hand on the table. Yosuke winces as he sees other customers glancing over at their group. “I’ll go grab you something, Yukiko! You want something fruity, right?”

“Oh, yes, please,” Yukiko nods. So Chie stands and runs after Souji. Yosuke can only pray for his safety.

“So, Yukiko-san…” Yosuke trails off awkwardly. Yukiko folds her hands on top of the table and gives him a half-smile.

“It’s nice to see how close you and Souji-kun are. Don’t tell her I said this, but Chie got a bit worried about you after you transferred.”

“Th-then why did she give me the wrong number the first time I asked?”

Yukiko just laughs at that. Not the crazy laugh that Yosuke’s seen a couple of times, but a genuine one nonetheless. Yosuke supposes he doesn’t mind if Yukiko gets a little bit of amusement at his expense. After all, it wasn’t such a bad thing, getting a wrong number from Chie.

 Souji turns up then, triumphantly waving a couple of drinks around. He puts one down on the table and offers the other to Yosuke with a smile. Souji never smiles very broadly, but Yosuke’s beginning to learn how to recognise the difference between the polite smile he gives most people and the genuine one, even if they don’t look much different.

“Thanks, Partner,” Yosuke says, and damn, when did he start calling Souji that all the time? Sometime in the TV, he knows, but he can’t seem to help himself. “Here, the money to pay for it.”

“It’s on me,” Souji says. “Just take it.”

“Nope. Here, take my money.”

They face off, Yosuke shoving the coins into Souji’s face and Souji attempting to press the can into Yosuke’s free hand, which he holds close to his chest. But then Souji surprises Yosuke with a sneak attack – he ducks Yosuke’s outstretched arm and grabs his other hand, pushing the can firmly into it. Yosuke, huffing a laugh, drops the coins all over Souji’s head. They bounce off and scatter on the ground.

“Now look what you’ve done!” Yosuke accuses, but he’s grinning. Souji’s looking up at him from where he’s still sort of leaning over Yosuke’s lap with a smug look on his face. He totally won this time, the bastard.

“What on earth are those two doing?” Yosuke faintly hears Chie say from the other side of the table.

…what _are_ they doing? Souji’s still got his long fingers around Yosuke’s wrist, the other hand curled around Yosuke’s hand, forcing him to keep hold of the drink. Suddenly aware of Souji’s proximity, of Souji’s _hands_ , Yosuke springs back, unable to help the flush that spreads high across his cheeks.

“You’re ridiculous,” he mumbles, pulling his hand back and away from Souji so that he can open the drink. He takes a long gulp, firmly ignoring whatever Chie’s saying in the background.

When he looks across at Souji’s seat, he’s not there. Oh – he’s picking the coins off the ground with an odd, contemplative look on his face. Once he’s got them all, he looks up. Upon seeing Yosuke looking at him, he smiles tentatively. Yosuke goes ahead and smiles right back.

Inevitably, they end up talking about the murders. The mood’s somewhat sombre at first – speculating based on who might want Yukiko dead, on why the victims have all been women so far. But eventually it turns stupid – and how could it not, with _Chie_ involved in the conversation?

“Using my own strength is _way_ nobler, way cooler than using some bits of metal junk to fight. Right, Yukiko?” she says, slapping a hand down on the table.

After a moment’s thought, Yukiko says, “Well, it’s very impressive, yes.”

Yosuke’s not going to stand for that. He gets to his feet, chair scraping as he pushes it back. “Sure, it’s impressive,” he allows. “But let’s be real. You’re lagging, Chie. See, Partner and I, we’re the real deal. We’re gaining exquisite mastery over our weapons _and_ our magic.” He punctuates his point with a flourish and smirks inwardly at the way Chie’s face is reddening. “Isn’t that right?” he goes on, turning to Souji.

Souji’s looking at him almost dopily, cheek rested in one hand, lips tilted up. “Partner?” Yosuke prompts.

“Oh, yeah. Definitely,” Souji says seriously.

If Yosuke didn’t know any better, he’d say he didn’t think Souji had been listening at all. But there’s no opportunity to even consider it – Chie’s on her feet too now, and it looks like he’s in for a real verbal beating.

* * *

The days flow on. Yosuke spends a few afternoons in a row working – to make up for all the shifts he moved around for Yukiko’s sake – and Souji just nods when Yosuke says he won’t be able to hang out for a while.

What Yosuke does not expect is to come to school after all this work and hear rumours that Souji and Yukiko are dating. He overhears it from a few different groups as he heads to the classroom, all people from his year. He stops in the hallway just outside his classroom and covertly listens in to a couple of guys muttering jealously about how it’s ridiculous that all the girls seem to like Souji so much.

If Yosuke’s going to be honest with himself, it’s not as if the rumours are _unlikely_. Souji’s ( _objectively_ ) really attractive and Yukiko’s not blind. Souji’s also clever and patient and a man of many talents and yeah, they’d be a good match, wouldn’t they?

 **(08:22)** so r u and yukiko dating??

His finger hovers over the send button, hesitating. Then he shakes his head and just sends it. Why not? It’s not a weird text to send.

Souji’s replies have been really quick lately, but Yosuke waits a few minutes and there’s nothing. Well, maybe Souji’s just busy walking to school with one of his many friends. That’s okay.

Just as he’s about to go inside, he catches a flash of red out of the corner of his eye. It’s Yukiko, walking towards him as calmly as can be, showing no evidence whatsoever that she’s going out with the current stud of Yasoinaba High.

“Good morning, Yosuke-kun,” she says, polite as ever. “Were you waiting for someone? Souji-kun, perhaps?”

 _Still using honorifics,_ Yosuke thinks. _That’s a good sign._

…no, wait, it’s not a _good_ sign as such. It just means that it’s not as likely that they’re dating. It’s not good _or_ bad.

“Uh, I guess I’m kind of just… loitering,” Yosuke says lamely.

Yukiko blinks at him. It’s completely impossible to tell what she’s thinking. “You’re kind of weird, Yosuke-kun,” she says. “Funny, though.” She nods at him, smiling, looking like she’s about to go inside.

“Ah, wait, can I ask you something?” Yosuke takes a deep breath. “Are you and Souji… like… going out?”

Yukiko stares. Then she covers her mouth with one hand and snickers. “What? Where on earth did you get that idea?”

 _She didn’t answer the question_. Yosuke narrows his eyes. “There are rumours all over the place about you two.”

“Oh, really?” Yukiko’s not laughing now. She sighs. “How odd. We only spent a few hours together – Souji-kun has offered to help me out with… something. Perhaps we were seen leaving school together.”

Yosuke doesn’t bother to question what the suspicious _something_ Souji is helping Yukiko with might be. He just nods. “Okay. Sure.”

“Well, if that’s all…” She dips her head and heads inside.

“See you in a few,” Yosuke says. He doesn’t really know if he can believe her or not, but that doesn’t matter because he can see Souji himself approaching, walking at a leisurely pace, bag slung over his shoulder. When he sees Yosuke, his face visibly brightens and his pace quickens.

“Hey, Partner,” Yosuke says.

“Hey,” Souji comes to a stop right in front of him. “Why haven’t you gone in?”

“Oh, you know.” Yosuke waves a hand and Souji tilts his head as if to say, _no, I don’t know what you mean at all_. “Did you get my text?”

“I did feel my phone vibrate, but I was walking with Kou,” Souji says as he goes to fish it out of his pocket. That’s right – Souji joined the basketball team, didn’t he? Yosuke watches, a little impatient, as Souji opens the text. “Am I… _what_? Yukiko? Me?” he splutters.

“She denied it,” Yosuke says. “But I mean, I’m hearing people talk about it all over the place, so…”

Souji glances up and down the hallway. There’s plenty of people still standing around outside – still plenty of time before class starts. Souji moves closer to Yosuke and says, under his breath, “We’re not dating. She wants me to help her out with her cooking.”

“Oh… is _that_ all?” Actually, he’s kind of curious as to what that’s all about. But it can wait. He just needs to make sure.

Souji nods fervently.

“Do you _want_ to be dating her?” Yosuke feels a little bit like he’s interrogating Souji or something, but hey, as Souji’s best friend, he needs to look out for him, right?

Souji raises an eyebrow and shakes his head.

“Well, I guess the whole shadow thing did ruin her perfect image.”

Souji narrows his eyes at that. “It’s hardly anything to do with that,” he says, still keeping his voice low. “I’m just not interested in her. That’s all.”

Yosuke stares levelly at him. He doesn’t even look like he’s lying. “Weird,” he says finally, turns on his heel and goes into the classroom. Souji follows silently.

“Anyway, forget that,” Yosuke says once he’s put his bag down. “Are you busy today?”

Souji, who was rummaging through his bag, freezes. “I thought you were working,” he says, a faint note of distress to his voice. “I’m sorry. I promised to go to practice. Kou won’t be happy with me if I don’t turn up.”

Yosuke shakes his head. “Don’t worry about it, man. You have fun.”

Souji stares at him for a moment longer, frowning. “We haven’t hung out for a while, though.”

“Well, it’s not like I’m going anywhere. Come on, don’t look that way!” Yosuke forces a grin and gives Souji a poke in the shoulder. He seems to cheer up after that, going off on some tangent about Nanako-chan and how very precious she is.

Yosuke had forgotten just how it felt to fake a smile. It’s been a while since he’s needed to.

* * *

Despite all of his words to the contrary, Yosuke’s kind of pissed as he heads home alone. He’s not even sure _why_ he’s so annoyed. It’s certainly not Souji’s fault that Yosuke’s such a jealous prat.

Because that’s what it _has_ to be – jealousy. Yosuke isn’t going to pretend it’s anything else. Souji can so much as say someone else’s name and he'll feel uncomfortable, irrationally so. It’s a mixture of things, Yosuke thinks. The unfairness of how easily Souji’s been accepted, for starters, especially when he’d made himself sound so socially awkward back before they’d met. And then there’s the fact that a few months ago, Souji was _his_ friend. Yosuke was Souji’s _only_ friend and no one else at school had even the smallest connection to him. Now it’s different. Now everyone knows who Souji is.

It’s petty, Yosuke knows that. He should consider himself lucky that Souji’s even here – who knows what would’ve happened to their friendship had he gone to live anywhere else, someplace far away from Yosuke.

But… _still_. Someday there’s going to be some girl clinging onto his arm and giggling about how funny his fixation with cats is. How very charming it is.

When his phone vibrates in his jacket pocket, Yosuke almost falls off his bike in surprise. He pulls over to the side of the road, thinking he’d better check it in case it’s his dad asking him to come in for work.

It isn’t his dad.

 **(15:58)** _Wish I could be with you. Practice isn’t fun when I know that you’re free right now._

Yosuke stares and stares, reads it over and over. Then he smiles, unable to stop himself.

God, he’s an idiot. He hasn’t lost Souji at all. Not yet, at least.

* * *

After that, Yosuke makes sure that Souji knows in advance when he’s free. Just in case. Only two days later, Souji announces he doesn’t have anything he needs to be doing, so they meander down the road from school together, no real destination in mind.

“Riverbank again?” Yosuke proposes.

“Mm… yeah,” Souji says. He’s looking up at the sky, the sun lighting his skin and eyes. “It’s a nice day.”

“Might be a good omen. Maybe we’ll see some cats today,” Yosuke says teasingly.

Souji tilts his head ever so slightly to the side, sending Yosuke a wry smile. “I’m beginning to think you were lying about there being cats in Inaba, you know.”

“Hey, no way! There’s always cats!” Yosuke protests. “It’s probably you. They think you’re creepy.”

“Don’t be silly,” Souji says airily. _Such confidence_ , Yosuke thinks.

Once they arrive, they spend about half an hour walking up and down the bank. There’s no one there today - no one to give them weird looks for just aimlessly walking up and down. Not that Yosuke minds it. Just being with Souji makes doing anything okay, really. He doesn’t feel so insecure anymore, not like he used to, conscious of his every action and of every other person around him.

There’s a bit of an embarrassing moment when he’s heading out onto the dock – hey, there’s always a possibility of finding a cat going for a swim in the river, right? – and he slips on the wet wood, falling on his ass with a squeak. He expects Souji to start cackling, but the other boy is very suddenly in front of him, a hand on his shoulder, grey eyes searching his.

“You alright?” Souji asks.

“It’s fine, just broke my pride,” Yosuke mumbles, knowing he’s flushed red. Souji’s face relaxes into a smile, and _now_ he’s laughing, the bastard. But there’s no malice in it, only warmth, and Yosuke can’t help but look at his feet, can’t look at Souji’s bright eyes for too long.

“What did you think you’d find here anyway?” he asks once he’s done laughing.

“A swimming cat,” Yosuke says under his breath. Actually, from down here, he can see fish flitting here and there just under the surface of the water. He crawls to the edge of the dock and sits there, legs hanging off the edge, letting the water lap at his shoes. “Hey, look at all the fish,” he says, looking back up at Souji delightedly.

“Fish? I didn’t think you’d care about fish,” Souji says thoughtfully, taking a seat right next to Yosuke, close enough that their thighs are brushing. Yosuke doesn’t mind the contact.

“Nah, I don’t, really. But I never bothered to see just why the fishermen are always so interested in chilling out right here. It’s kind of cool, isn’t it? Looking for the shapes just under the water?”

“I suppose so,” Souji says, voice light with amusement.

“Be honest, you’re thinking I’m a real kid right now, huh?” Yosuke says wryly, turning to evaluate Souji’s expression. It’s hard to tell what Souji’s thinking, really. He looks content, though – relaxed.

“I’m the one you’re indulging with the mission to find and pet a cat,” Souji shrugs, and Yosuke grins.

“Very true.” He stands up then, feeling a little too twitchy to stay still, even though he’d be content to sit there all afternoon. “Ahh, I give up,” he says with a wide yawn, stretching his arms above his head. “You go find your cat and bring it to me, alright? I think I’m going to have a nap.” With that, he heads back over to the grass and flops down on the slope, eyes slipping shut.

Much to his surprise, moments later he feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. It can’t be his dad, surely – he doesn’t get texts from him on days off.

Upon reading it, he snorts.

 **(16:37)** _Can’t believe you’ve abandoned me like this_. _All alone with the fish._

He cranes his neck and sees Souji still sitting in the same place on the dock, pouting at him. It’s a funny look on the normally straight-faced boy – Yosuke can’t help but sputter a laugh.

 **(16:37)** cmere then u big baby. uve got legs dont u?

He lays back down and shuts his eyes again, only to be disturbed once more when there’s a thump right next to him. He opens his eyes and Souji is very much _right there_ , lying next to Yosuke, face _right next to Yosuke’s_.

“Hello,” Souji says. Yosuke inhales sharply. Souji’s wearing something that smells nice. Yosuke can’t quite pick it out.

He wants to say something back, but he’s lost for words, heart picking up. This feels… it all feels too… _too_ …

Quite suddenly, Souji pounces. Yosuke lets out a yelp as Souji starts to tickle him, flailing his arms when Souji goes for the armpits.

“The _fuck_ , man,” he wheezes once Souji’s done, sitting back and looking like the cat who’s got the cream.

“You know how I’ve been watching a lot of TV lately? I saw someone do that and I’ve wanted to try ever since,” he announces, looking far too pleased with himself.

Yosuke nods slowly, rolling his eyes. “Sure thing, Partner,” he says, trying to sound airy and nonplussed.

 _But really,_ he thinks to himself as he settles back down. _What_ was _that?_

* * *

They’re down there again the next day, down at the riverbank. Souji’s skipping basketball and it’s one of Yosuke’s days off, so they’re cat-hunting. _Again_. Yosuke wonders if they’ll ever get bored of it.

“Honestly, they were way easier to find last year,” Yosuke mumbles, peering behind a bush.

“Well, it’s okay if we don’t see them today.” Souji comes up behind him and looks around the same bush that Yosuke just inspected. He kind of wants to tell Souji off for being so inefficient, but it’s not as if it really matters. “I mean, we can just hang out on the riverbank, right?”

“I guess so. We’ve come by so many times, though. I feel like I’ve lied to you.” Yosuke sighs and looks up towards the sky. Souji just makes the funny clucking sound that he apparently thinks will attract cats to him.

But Souji’s right. Yosuke’s not here for the cats, after all.

“Hey! Yosuke, look!” Souji suddenly, without warning, latches onto Yosuke’s sleeve, tugging it like an excited kid. Yosuke looks, and sees, with some surprise, that there’s an orange tabby cat watching the two of them warily from behind a nearby tree. It’s a skinny little thing, its spine and ribs visible beneath its ragged fur.

“I can’t believe it,” Yosuke says, eyes widening. It’s kind of a shock, after all this time. He was beginning to think someone had sprayed cat-repellent all over Inaba or something.

Souji goes on ahead, pulling a box out of his bag – one containing scraps from home he always brings just in case. “You look hungry,” he says softly to the cat, bending down when he’s a few metres away. It doesn’t move, but it goes visibly tenser the closer Souji gets. Yosuke just stays back, knowing that he’s more likely than not to scare it away. He’s never been very good with animals. “Here. Try this,” Souji urges, pulling a bit of what looks like fish meat from the box and tossing it towards the cat.

It doesn’t respond immediately, but looks back and forth between the bit of meat and Souji, evidently suspicious. But after a minute or so, it creeps forward, keeping its gaze fixed on Souji, who stays absolutely still. As soon as it reaches the meat, it seems to forget all about Souji and begins eating ravenously.

“You could probably stroke it now,” Yosuke says softly.

Souji lifts a hand, but then shakes his head, not turning away from the cat. “No, I’d only scare it.”

Yosuke hates to admit it, but Souji’s probably right. A lot of the stray cats are pretty friendly, especially if there’s food involved, but this one is especially skittish. The moment it’s done, it rushes back behind the tree, watching Souji with huge eyes. Souji simply puts the box down and takes several steps back until he’s right next to Yosuke.

“What’s the use of that?” Yosuke grumbles. “You could save some scraps for a friendlier cat. I’m sure it’d be much more fulfilling if you could pet it, or something.”

Souji doesn’t respond for a while – he’s busy staring at the cat. “I’m happy just watching it like this,” he says softly. “This is enough. Just having the knowledge that I can help it, and that it feels a bit better because of me.”

The cat, as it eats, waves its tail. Yosuke privately thinks that if it were him, he wouldn’t waste his time on a cat like that. Really, Souji’s one of a kind.

* * *

“Welcome home!” comes the usual cry from in front of the TV. Nanako smiles brightly at Souji as he enters the house, taking his shoes off. “How was your day, Big Bro?”

Souji smiles fondly at that – he’s still not quite used to the nickname. “It was good,” he says, smiling widely at her. “Really good.”

“You look happy,” Nanako says brightly, like his happiness brings her the utmost joy. It probably does, really. She’s a precious thing, she is. “Are you in love?” she goes on, clapping her hands together.

Souji’s struck dumb at that. “Oh, no,” he says after a moment. “I just hung out with Yosuke. It was good weather.”

Nanako hums at that. “Yosuke’s nice,” she says with a nod, and turns back to the TV.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Um, hi? Can you believe it? It's me? nebulous updated? yeeeaaaah?
> 
> No, but seriously, I can't apologise enough for leaving you guys hanging for such a long time. I doubt many of you are holding it against me, but still. I won't blather on about what exactly was going on this semester, but basically it's not been the most fun in the world and I had to put aside a lot of things to make it through, as much as I hated to do not be doing the things I enjoyed most (i.e. writing this fic ;_;).
> 
> I get a bit of a break now, so hopefully I'll be able to churn out a few more updates before I'm back to the daily grind of uni. I can't make any promises - there's still a lot going on. But this fic means a lot to me, so yeah. Don't ever think I'm giving up on this.
> 
> (and thanks to everyone who's been commenting!! it really is a delight getting kind comments when I'm drowning in endless study and self-pity!)


	15. Chapter 15

**May**

What with the whole mess with Yukiko and the TV World, not to mention all the time he’s been spending with Souji, Yosuke knows he hasn’t studied enough for the tests. That’s nothing unusual, though. He always seems to find himself at his desk the night before the tests begin, leant back, staring at the ceiling, wondering where the hell he’s even going to start.

“Seriously,” he mumbles to himself. “Why _don’t_ I listen in class, again?”

So he does the sensible thing in this situation: text Souji.

**(23:12)** ah im screwed

**(23:12)** help

He waits a few minutes, idly fiddling with his phone in one hand and imagining the seconds ticking by in his head. Panicked though he knows he should be, there’s a strange calm to be found in the inevitability of his poor marks. He may as well just sleep, but he won’t. He can do a little bit to salvage things, he knows – a little more effort tonight will go a long way in ensuring his dad won’t be _too_ pissed.

So eventually he picks up a book and starts to read.

Souji doesn’t respond that night.

* * *

The next day when Yosuke gets into school – earlier than usual, by some miracle – he finds Souji already waiting outside the classroom, a book open and eyes flicking back and forth across the text. Yosuke wonders vaguely if he’s even taking anything in.

“Hey, Partner,” he calls, lifting a hand in greeting.

Souji glances up and wow, he looks harried. Yosuke’s never seen him look so stressed before. He’s got huge bags under his eyes. “Hi,” he says shortly, then he’s back to his book.

_Oooookay_ , Yosuke thinks. He goes to stand next to Souji, but makes sure to leave a bit of distance. Clearly he’s not looking to be disturbed.

The test goes about as expected – which is to say, disastrously. He’s never been good at bullshitting answers. Immediately after they’re done for the day, Souji speeds off without so much as a word. Yosuke turns to Chie, who looks about as stricken as he feels.

“You think he’s alright?” he asks, jerking a finger in Souji’s direction.

“I’m more worried about myself right now,” Chie mumbles, shaking her head despondently.

_At least I’m not the only one_ , Yosuke thinks.

* * *

The rest of the tests pass by in pretty much the same way: Yosuke staring down in horror at every question, Souji and Yukiko practically sprinting out of the room once they’re done for the day, Chie and Yosuke sleepily dragging themselves home to continue studying.

“I’m not sure if I should be glad that’s all over or start crying,” Chie says at the end of the final test. The four of them are gathered together in the classroom, Yukiko turned around in her seat and Yosuke perched on Souji’s desk.

“What did you get for the one about verb conjugation?” Yukiko asks contemplatively.

“Present perfect,” Souji replies immediately, voice clipped.

“Oh my god,” Chie groans, laying her face down in her arms. “Please, let’s not do the whole discussing the answers thing.”

“For once I agree with Chie,” Yosuke says.

Souji, perhaps for the first time in the last three days, looks at Yosuke _properly_. “Was it okay?” he asks, eyes gentle and inquisitive. Yosuke just snorts and shakes his head.

“What about you, Souji-kun?” Yukiko asks. “You always seem very knowledgeable in class.”

Souji presses his lips together in a thin line. “I didn’t get as much time to study as usual,” he says carefully. Well, Yosuke thinks, that would explain the dark rings beneath his eyes and his constant rush.

“But it was still fine for you I bet,” Chie says, voice muffled by the sleeves of her jacket.

“I don’t know yet. It wasn’t easy,” Souji says finally, sounding reluctant to admit it. “For now, though, why don’t we go relax at Junes?”

“Yeah, we totally deserve it! Steak’s on you, Yosuke,” Chie says, quite suddenly full of cheer.

“Oh _no_ you don’t!” Yosuke yelps, leaping to his feet. He ends up chasing Chie out of the classroom, Yukiko and Souji following at a slower pace. Much to his relief, there's no more talk of the midterms after that.

* * *

**(22:23)** _Nanako’s been calling me her big bro ever since Golden Week._

Yosuke’s honestly a little surprised to get the text – they’d spent the whole afternoon together, the four of them, and after days of silence on Souji’s end, he’d kind of forgotten their texting was a thing.

**(22:24)** thats 2 sweet!! do u call her lil sis?

**(22:24)** _Isn’t that a bit much?_

**(22:25)** she calls u big bro so..?

**(22:25)** _She’s six! It’s cute from her. Isn’t it kind of creepy from me?_

Yosuke smiles to himself. He tries to imagine the Souji he’d first texted all those months ago trying to comprehend Nanako calling him her big bro. The Souji he knows right now isn’t like that, though. There’s a bit of bewilderment, sure, but Yosuke hadn’t missed the smile on Souji’s face when Nanako’d first said it.

**(22:26)** nana-chan then at least ok? shell luv it

**(22:28)** anyway its been lyk wat? a month? u 2 r already so close

**(22:29)** _It’s just the two of us most of the time at home. My uncle is pretty absent_.

**(22:30)**  cos of the murders?

**(22:32)** _Yes, but I feel like I’m missing something_.

It’s nice to know Souji’s chosen Yosuke to confide in, but what can he really say to that?

**(22:34)** i no u. ull figure it out

**(22:35)** _Come have dinner with Nanako and I sometime. She’s taken a shine to you and the others._

_Does that mean he's only inviting me...?_ Yosuke reads the text a couple of times. It kind of sounds that way.  

**(22:36)** wen?

**(22:36)** _When are you next free?_

* * *

As it turns out, the next day that they’re both free for the night is a while away. Yosuke has to pick up some late shifts to appease his dad after all the inconvenience he’d caused rearranging his hours to go into the TV World,  _then_ the whole mess with Kanji starts up.

There’s definitely something all kinds of weird going on with that guy. What sort of first year beats up biker gangs and then gets all nervous when some skinny kid gives him attention? Yosuke still can’t forget exactly what Kanji had said, all wide-eyed – _He’s a guy… and I’m a guy… but he’s interested in_ me _?_

It’s all just… weird. But that doesn’t mean Yosuke’s any less determined to save him. Souji looks determined as well, a certain life returning to his features. It’s nice to see. He’d looked like a ghost during the midterms.

So it kind of sucks when Kanji’s show comes on at midnight, even after they spend a couple of afternoons following him around. And the show itself… _well_ … Yosuke just decides to call Souji.

“What the hell was _that_?” is the first thing that comes out of Yosuke’s mouth when he hears the call connect. “I mean…!”

“Calm down. Let’s talk about it with level heads.”

So they do. Yosuke pushes his shock to the back of his mind – it’s more important that they get Kanji out of the TV, now that he’s there.

“By the way,” Souji says, just as Yosuke’s about to bid him goodnight. It’s pretty late, after all. He’s already in bed and everything, curled on his side, the phone on his pillow and the speakerphone option on. “When’s your next day off? Are we still on for dinner?”

“Oh, right! Yeah, um…” Yosuke casts around in his mind for what he’d seen on the roster. “Thursday night?”

“Good by me. We can relax a while after working on the investigation.” Despite the call quality, Yosuke can tell that Souji sounds more cheerful now.

“Then it’s a date,” Yosuke says through a yawn. “I mean, uh – you know.”

“Yeah,” Souji replies. “Goodnight, Yosuke.”

* * *

Thursday just so happens to be the day that the midterm results are released.

Yosuke first hears about it from a couple of girls passing by – “I can’t believe I did _that_ badly, mum’s gonna be _furious_ ,” – and it takes him a moment to realise exactly what they’re talking about. Once it hits him, he lets out a hollow laugh and heads straight to Souji’s desk. The other boy is inspecting something on his phone intently.

“Yo, Partner,” Yosuke says, resting a hand on the back of Souji’s seat. His fingers brush the back of Souji’s shirt.

“Hm?” Souji starts a little.

“Midterm results are out.” Yosuke tries his hardest to seem casual, but his tone is closer to the sound of someone who’s accepted death. He doesn’t think Souji notices it though – he’s worrying his lip and looking off to the side.

“I guess we should go look.” Somehow, Souji sounds more reluctant than Yosuke feels.

“Hey, don’t stress, alright?” Yosuke shifts his hand so it’s splayed across Souji’s back in what he hopes is a reassuring rub. “We gotta go bravely, no matter what, right?”

Souji doesn’t reply to that, but he lets out a long breath and stands up.

There’s a pretty sizeable crowd around the board, so Yosuke ends up manoeuvring through with a hand curled around Souji’s wrist to make sure he’s still coming. Just how bad can it be for him, after all? Yosuke knows he’s basically a genius – he’d said before that he’d been number one in his school in tests quite a few times and that had been in a _city_ school.

It doesn’t take long to find Souji’s name. Third on the list. Yosuke lets out a low whistle.

“Damn, I knew you were smart but that’s really something!” He turns to Souji with a wide grin, not bothering to search for his own name just yet. He needs to relish this happiness for at least a minute, after all. “Taking Yasogami High by storm, huh?”

He doesn’t expect the obvious disappointment on Souji’s face. “I guess it could’ve been worse,” he says, so quietly that Yosuke has to strain to hear him.

“Worse…?” Yosuke frowns. “What are you saying? You wanted better?” He refrains from adding, _how about you try finding_ my _name on that list_?

He turns back to the list and scans it. Oh, there he is, almost smack in the middle. Absolutely average. He can live with that. After all, he’d been a lot more worried about Yukiko than paying attention in school leading up to the midterms.

He's about to point out his name in the hopes it might prove something, but Souji’s already surrounded by admirers. Kou’s there, clapping a surprised-looking Souji on the back, as well as Yukiko and Chie, both of them smiling as broadly as Yosuke had been earlier. It’s good to see Yukiko looking content – her score isn't quite as high as usual, but after all she’s been through, can she really be blamed?

Yosuke manages to drag Souji away after what feels like an hour of listening to him gracefully waving aside compliments and mumbling, “It’s no big deal,” so charmingly that Yosuke swears half the girls in the year are going to start swooning about ‘ _that humble Souji Seta_ ’. He wouldn’t blame them. It’d look real cool to Yosuke too, except he’d seen the genuine unhappiness on Souji’s face earlier.

They walk in silence for a while, Yosuke giving Souji space to think. But it isn’t long before he can’t take it.

“You’re not happy… right?” He asks tentatively.

Souji comes to a halt, taking Yosuke by surprise. “Maybe I’ve been slacking,” he says, sounding more as if he’s talking to himself than to Yosuke. “Or…”

“You got _third_. That’s cause for celebration.”

“I can do better.” Souji looks Yosuke straight in the eye. “You believe me, right…?”

“Souji, Partner, you…” Yosuke heaves a sigh. “Yeah. Of course I believe you.” He wants to say something else as well, but Souji nods and keeps walking at that, looking somewhat placated. Yosuke doesn’t really want to push it. “So, what’s for dinner?” he asks instead, hoping Souji hasn’t forgotten their plans.

“Hmm… I think Nanako went shopping a couple days ago. We should be able to scavenge something from that.”

Nanako herself isn’t home when they arrive – Souji says something about Nanako often spending time at friends’ houses since he often isn’t home until evening – so Yosuke plops in front of the TV while Souji rummages in the fridge. As he’s become accustomed to doing, Yosuke changes channels until he finds the weather forecast. It seems like the weather’s going to hold out for a little while at least.

“What do you think of curry?” Souji asks as he eases himself down next to Yosuke on the floor, crossing his legs.

“Let’s be real – if you’re involved in making it, I’d eat anything,” Yosuke says, sending Souji a sideways smile.

Souji blinks once, then smiles back. “Is it alright if we head to Junes first, though? We’re out of carrots. Plus we might be able to get a lead on Kanji – someone said that boy with the hat hangs out around there sometimes.”

“Trying to take advantage of a certain someone’s staff discount, are you?” Yosuke jokes. Souji snorts and shakes his head.

“Come on, let’s go.”

* * *

They take longer than expected at Junes. The boy in the hat really is there, just as Souji had said, so they talk to him for a while, then call up Yukiko and Chie and head into the TV World to confirm Kanji’s location. By the time they emerge, it’s just about evening according to the time on Yosuke’s phone. After saying their goodbyes to the girls, they head to the produce section of the store.

Then, Souji gets distracted by a girl handing out free samples and starts asking her questions about just _what_ exactly had gone into that fudge. That’s quite enough time for two of their part-time workers to notice and approach Yosuke, who’s just innocently examining bags of chips and really _not_ hoping for harassment on his day off, because no _thank_ you.

“Hanamura,” one of them says, placing a hand on her hip sassily. What’s her name again…? He should remember. She’s the one his dad always complains about when he gives Yosuke rides home. He sighs, stands a little straighter and assumes his ‘Complaints Department’ pose.

“Is everything okay?” he asks, plastering on a smile and pretending he hadn’t just been trying to make himself smaller in the hopes that they wouldn’t see him. “Are you two working right now?”

“Yes, but we shouldn’t be.” That’s the other girl. She steps forward and takes the same pose as her friend. “Neither of us said in our interviews that we could do Thursdays!”

Yosuke, with great effort, refrains from rolling his eyes. How they got hired is beyond him, especially when half the time his own attitude doesn't seem to be up to his dad’s standards. “But you’re making up for missing last Sunday, right?”

“We shouldn’t have to work Sundays either! That’s our _weekend_!”

“Okay, but you did say that you were free to work on Sundays, right?”

“Only because that was the only way to get the stupid job!” The first girl lifts her chin, giving the effect that she’s looking down on Yosuke despite being a fair bit shorter than him. “You better do something about this, Hanamura. We can’t get fired.”

_So just keep your promises!_ Yosuke wants to scream. Instead, he nods, keeping his smile fixed. God, it must look stiff by now. “I’ll see what I can do, but no promises,” he says. This isn’t any worse than dealing with snippy customers, he tells himself. He’s pretty used to it.

“Whatever. If it was Saki you’d have begged, huh?” With that cruel remark, the first of the two girls turns on her heel and stalks away. The other girl sneers at him before following. Through the ringing in his ears, Yosuke hears them continue talking loudly as they go to restock shelves in another aisle.

Yosuke takes a bag of chips without checking the flavour, forces himself to turn away and walks back to Souji, who’s just standing at the end of the aisle, a large bag of carrots in his arms. It’s impossible to tell if he’d seen anything or not, but Yosuke forces the smile back onto his face just in case.

They’re going to have a _good_ night. Dinner with Nanako. He doesn’t need to ruin it by being melodramatic over little things like this.

* * *

The sun’s fading by the time they return. They wander around the neighbourhood a bit and Souji, with some triumph, points out a stray cat that’s taken a liking to him. It follows them all the way back to the Dojima residence, tail waving hopefully as it gazes at Souji with expectant amber eyes. Yosuke heads indoors and takes his shoes off while Souji feeds the cat a couple of scraps.

“You know, I haven’t even seen your room yet,” Yosuke says.

“Haven’t you?” Souji asks from where he’s crouched just outside the front door, absentmindedly rubbing the cat behind its ears. “You can come up after dinner. There’s not much to see – it’s the smallest room in a small house.”

Yes, it certainly is smaller than Yosuke’s place. More traditional looking, too. Nothing like the apartment Yosuke had always used to visualise Souji – Stranger – living in.

“I’m going to start the curry,” Souji says, finally coming inside.

“Oh, uh, is there anything I can do to help?”

Souji turns and looks at Yosuke thoughtfully. “Are you any good at chopping veggies?”

He's not, but he gives it a good go anyhow. His attempt is deserving of a _Good Effort!_ award, he reckons. When Souji comes over to check up on him and sees the misshapen lumps of carrots that Yosuke had so carefully sliced, he just laughs and slings an easy arm over Yosuke’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles, embarrassed at his own incompetence, especially since Souji’s basically a god in the kitchen.

“Perfect,” Souji says, leaning a bit further into Yosuke before pulling away and taking the veggies over to the pot he’s prepared. “Um, Yosuke, by the way…”

“Mm?”

“Those girls at Junes earlier… what did they want?”

_Oh…_ Yosuke had been trying his hardest to forget about that. “Nothing, really,” he says as lightly as he can. “Just the usual – trying to appeal to the manager’s son for favours, you know.”

“You didn’t look too happy.” Souji’s paused in his preparation of the curry, looking straight at Yosuke with solemn eyes.

“Well, isn’t it natural to get kinda pissed at stuff like that?” Yosuke tries, knowing it’s a weak excuse.

Just then, there’s a rattle as the front door opens. They both look over to see Nanako slip inside. “I’m home!” she sings out. “Big bro, you’re back already! Oh! And Yosuke!” She carefully removes her shoes and sets them on the rack before rushing over to stand by Souji’s side. God, she’s adorable.

“Heya, Nanako,” Yosuke says in return, grateful for the interruption.

“Hi, Nanako.” Souji’s expression is soft. “How was your day?”

Nanako seems all too pleased to relay the details of her day in great detail, barely giving either of the boys time to respond with more than an ‘mm’ or an ‘ahh’ here and there. Souji returns to the meal in the meantime, glancing briefly at Yosuke but not saying anything more.

After Nanako's done, Souji very insistently presses the two of them down around the table and Yosuke ends up losing to a six year old in answering quiz show questions. Either he’s _really_ stupid or Nanako’s really smart – and hey, it's a win-win situation if he chooses to believe the latter option, so he'll do just that. He ignores the Souji-like voice in his head reminding him that there might be a 'both' option'.

“It’s ready!” Souji announces. Yosuke looks up to see Souji approaching the table with a plate in either hand. _Very domestic_ , he thinks.

“Yay!” Nanako chimes, clapping her hands together. “You can cook so many different things, Big Bro!”

“He’s clever, huh?” Yosuke grins across the table at her, and she nods vigorously.

“He’s the best!” she says decisively. Yosuke notices that Souji’s ears are red after he comes back with a third plate and joins them.

They watch the quiz show for a bit while they eat and Souji proves that he indeed knows way too much random trivia. All the right answers in class can’t be coincidences after all.

“Oh, Big Bro!” Nanako stands up abruptly. “I almost forgot!” She rounds the table to stand behind Souji. “Um, can you close your eyes?” He twists to look back at her, then nods and shuts his eyes obediently. Yosuke watches on with a warm fondness growing in his chest as she pulls something out from behind her back and places it around Souji’s neck. It’s… a medal.

“I think it’s okay to open your eyes now,” Yosuke says as Nanako steps back, looking nervous.

Souji’s hands go to the medal and he lifts it so that he can get a better look. It’s something Yosuke’s seen selling in Junes for pretty cheap, though it shines brilliantly under the light as Souji twists it back and forth. The ribbon it hangs on is different though. It’s pink – _ah_ , just like the ribbons she uses to tie her hair. Souji looks delighted, if a little confused.

“Thank you Nanako – what’s this for?”

“I saw Yukiko and Chie after school and they told me all about your amazing test score!” she answers brightly. “So they helped me pick this out for you! Do you like it?”

Souji’s mouth has fallen open. It's so rare to see him lost for words that Yosuke has to hide a smile. “I… I really love it. Thank you,” he says quietly. “You didn’t have to, though. I didn’t do that well. It was no big deal.”

“They said you were third in your whole year! That’s really good!” Nanako returns to her own side of the table. She seems unaware of the way Souji’s mood has changed.

“He’s been working real hard. Don’t let him fool ya, Nanako,” Yosuke puts in, lowering his voice in a conspiratorial way.

“I won’t!” Nanako agrees.

Later on, they leave Nanako to watch TV and head upstairs. Souji lingers at the door of his room for a moment. “Um… come in,” he says finally.

Souji’s room definitely isn’t what he expects. Sure, Yosuke knows it’s a small house, so the size of the room is no surprise. It’s the _mess_ that comes as a shock. The desk can barely be seen beneath what appears to be an explosion of paper and there are workbooks stacked messily on the table by the couch, some of them still open.

“What’s all this?” he asks, turning back to look at Souji, who’s still hovering in the doorway. “Didn’t you tidy up after the tests? Man, I’d burn my notes to get them out of sight, but my mum would yell at me.”

“I’m just organising things for the next set of tests,” Souji says matter-of-factly.

“You – what?”

“In July. That’s only a few months away.”

Yosuke blinks. “Aren’t you taking this too seriously?” he says, voice faint.

“I’m taking it more seriously now.” Souji sits cross-legged at the table and starts shutting some of the workbooks. “I need to work harder.”

“But… you…” Yosuke’s at a loss for words. “Partner, you work plenty hard. I’ll bet you were studying yourself to death those few days before the tests – you know, when you stopped replying to my texts? Right?”

Souji looks up so quickly that Yosuke’s worried he’ll break his neck. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to –“

“No, no, I’m not making any accusations. I’m just saying I think you have ridiculously high expectations for yourself. I mean, what about me?” Yosuke laughs. “I just gave up and went to sleep most nights, man.”

“It’s just… I have more on my plate now, so…” Souji gestures helplessly at the books, looking calmer now. “I wonder if I got a bit carried away. You know, living away from my parents.”

Yosuke’s stomach sinks. _Is Souji regretting wasting all that time with me…?_ He can’t bring himself to ask. But Souji keeps talking anyway, almost as if he can’t stop himself now that he’s started.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have taken on two clubs. It’s not like we ever play any games or do any performances anyway. But I can’t let Kou or Ayane-chan down now.” Souji stands and starts putting all the paper on his desk into orderly piles. “Maybe it’s better if I ask Yukiko to get help from the inn workers, then? Or tell Chie to train by herself… no, no, that’s not right…”

“Is it alright for us to muck around by the river so much?” Yosuke asks in a small voice. Souji goes still. “I mean, we don’t have to. I know grades are important to you. I can keep myself entertained.”

“I don’t want to stop spending time with you,” Souji says firmly. “Well, or anyone, for that matter.”

“You don’t have to!” Yosuke approaches him now, unable to hide his frustration. He pulls Souji away from the desk, sick of seeing him shuffle paper around, and pushes him down onto the couch. He actually stays put there – Yosuke had half-expected him to start on the piles on the table again. “Can’t you just be happy with your grades as they are? They’re not everything, you know. Hell, they’re not really all that important.”

“You can say that, but–“

“Isn’t it more important that we saved Yukiko?” Yosuke shouts, cutting Souji off. He takes a deep breath and thinks _hey, watch the volume!_ to himself. Nanako hasn’t gone to bed yet, after all. “Because you know what, I’d fail every test for the rest of my life, be _last place_ , dammit, if it means that I could’ve saved Saki.” His voice breaks on the last few words. _Lame_ … _who does that when they’re trying to say something cool?_

Souji looks stricken. “I’m… I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry.”

“I know you didn’t, Partner. I know that.” Yosuke turns away. He can’t bear standing above Souji when he’s making that face. “It’s getting late. I should go home.”

Souji doesn’t say a word as Yosuke leaves the room.

“Were you… fighting?” Nanako asks hesitantly from her spot in front of the TV. _Oh… I was that loud, huh?_

“No, Nanako-chan,” Yosuke reassures her. “It’s not like that.”

She appears unconvinced, but he says goodbye and locks the front door behind him without any further explanation.

Yosuke spends the walk home stewing – _dammit, if third’s good enough for all your friends, good enough for Nanako, it should be good enough for_ you – but as soon as he’s home he regrets absolutely everything.

_Oh god, I went too far, didn’t I?_ Thinking back on it, bringing Saki up had been _way_ too much. Surely that makes him no better than the girls at Junes earlier on?

Souji doesn’t text him, not even to say goodnight, and Yosuke has no idea if it’d even be welcome for him to send a text of his own.

* * *

So they head back into the TV World with a weird tension hanging over them, kind of similar to how it'd been back in Yukiko’s Castle. The battles are as comfortable as they can be, all things considered. Yosuke feels Souji’s watchful eyes on him every time he gets in the first strike and he always follows up with his own well-placed attacks. They’re still as great a team as ever. And Yukiko’s a great addition too, always quick to heal injuries and blasting shadows with flames so intense that Yosuke sometimes catches himself flinching.

It’s different outside of battles. Conversations are stilted, Souji unable to meet Yosuke’s eyes and Yosuke lagging behind, keeping the girls in between him and their leader. The atmosphere of the bathhouse doesn’t help either. The heat only makes Yosuke feel even more agitated - his hair’s damp with sweat and he’s worried that the steam will interfere with his music player. Not only that, but Kanji’s shadow is creepy as hell and weird, unnerving noises keep echoing through the halls.

Despite that, things are going fine until the third floor, when one of those freaking bear shadows aims right at Yosuke and quite suddenly, he’s on the floor, wheezing for breath and clutching at his stomach. _It hit me_ , he thinks dazedly. _Weird… I was doing so well dodging everything before this…_

Then there’s the familiar warmth of a Dia spell and Souji’s on his knees next to Yosuke, hands tightly gripping his shoulders.

“I’m fine,” Yosuke says quickly, sitting up. He is, really. “Just being useless as always, huh?” he jokes when the concern doesn’t leave Souji’s eyes.

“Don’t say that!” he snaps, taking Yosuke by surprise. And, by the looks of it, Yukiko and Chie as well. Right… they’ve probably never seen Souji anything but calm and composed. “How many times have I told you not to say things like that?”

“Oh…” Yosuke smiles wryly at the ground. “You’ve been telling me that for a while, huh? Old habits die hard.”

Souji, apparently satisfied, stands and offers Yosuke a hand. And who is he to say no? Souji’s hand is warm, just like the time he’d rescued Yosuke from the garbage.

“What was that all about?” Chie asks once Yosuke’s on his feet.

“We’re heading back for now,” Souji says instead of answering her question. “We might need a bit more practice. The shadows aren’t as tame as they were on the earlier floors.”

Yukiko and Chie both agree readily, but they give Yosuke curious, inquiring looks until they all part ways for the day. That’s when Yosuke realises that neither of them actually know how long Yosuke’s _really_ known Souji.

But… he kind of likes it that way. He isn't even sure why, but he likes having something with Souji that no one else even knows about. It's private, just between the two of them.

_It’s our little secret_ , he thinks to himself as he trudges home, and can’t help but smile.

* * *

“I made croquettes, so we’re going to have lunch on the roof together now.”

Souji’s kind of red in the face, but there’s definite conviction in the way he slams his boxed lunch on Yosuke’s desk. Yosuke has to take a moment to just gape dumbly because, until now, he’d been minding his own business, skipping through songs on his music player because it’s just one of those days where none of the songs are _right._

Anyhow, he’s quite aware they’re getting curious looks, so he quickly stands. “Alright, alright, I’m coming.”

It’s kind of awkward at first. They still haven’t said anything about the fight – was it a fight? Yosuke still isn’t sure – but the food’s good. Of _course_ it’s good.

“I must’ve sounded really selfish.” Souji speaks so quietly that Yosuke barely catches it. Then he needs a moment to process it, because – what?

“What do you mean?”

“Well, isn’t that what you were getting at the other day? I kept going on about myself and my grades when I’m involved in something so much bigger.” Souji pushes aside his share of the food. He’s barely touched it. Yosuke, for some reason, feels guilty about the fact that he’s already polished off most of his. “You were right. I’m sorry.”

“No, wait… I didn’t want you to apologise!” Yosuke says. Souji tilts his head, obviously confused now. “I’m the one who should be saying sorry! I said a whole lot of crap. Like always. I shouldn’t have brought Yukiko or Saki into it.”

“It wasn’t crap, though. You were right, I just said so.” Souji pauses. “So… you weren’t angry?”

“Hell no! Just frustrated. You’re so amazing, Partner, but you…” Yosuke waves a hand around, searching for words. “Why can’t you be proud of yourself? Everyone at school’s impressed, Nanako gave you that medal and I’m – I’m so proud. I can’t believe I can call a guy like you my friend. My, um, best friend.” Yosuke’s quite aware that he’s flushing furiously at the end of his spiel, but he needs Souji to _get_ it.

Souji stares at Yosuke for a long time. He’s got that attentive look on his face, the one Yosuke can imagine making girls fall for him if he wears it while they spill all their woes to him. It makes Yosuke kind of flustered to be on the receiving end of it, so much that he ends up saying, “Well, don’t leave me hanging!”

“I’m so lucky,” Souji says simply. “So lucky you’re here.”

“Wha-?” If Yosuke wasn’t red before, he definitely is now. He has no idea how Souji says shit like that while looking so calm. Doesn’t he even know how it sounds?

“The case comes first. Then my friends, _then_ study. I can do it at night. There’s still time after we go into the TV.” It's obvious that Souji's changing the subject, but Yosuke goes with it. Better than trying to look unaffected by those cheesy-ass comments.

“Well, don’t wear yourself out. After all, we need you. You’re our trusty leader.”

Souji closes his eyes and nods thoughtfully. “You shouldn’t overwork yourself either.”

“When do I ever?” Yosuke laughs, shaking his head.

“Weren’t you working most of the days we weren’t in the TV World when we were trying to save Yukiko? And there’s school nearly every day, too. You looked tired.”

Well, Yosuke can’t deny that it had been tiring. He hadn’t hated it, though. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he gets a real thrill out of going into the TV World. Last year, back before Souji had arrived, every day had felt slow. They'd passed by in a lethargic haze. Those days had been a lot more tiring, in their own way.

“Okay, I’ll make sure to slack off in school. Keep on feeding me answers, alright?” Yosuke grins. Souji huffs a laugh.

They sit comfortably for a while. Yosuke ends up eating half of Souji’s lunch through sneaky chopstick attacks – Yosuke suspects Souji’s just letting him do it. By the time the bell rings, he’s just about forgotten anything had ever been wrong in the first place.

* * *

Later that night, Souji’s at his desk, brow furrowed as he tries to comprehend the textbook he’s reading. It’s well ahead in the syllabus compared to where they are in class, but he figures there’s no harm done.

His phone buzzes.

**(23:48)** hey wat do u thinks up with kanji anyways??

Souji briefly considers turning his phone off and replying later, but his mind provides him with the look on Yosuke’s face when he’d mentioned Souji’s silence during the midterms. He’d brushed it off later on, but…

**(23:50)** _If his shadow is anything like the others we’ve met, we’ll find out soon_.

**(23:54)** ur rite. well its l8 so time for bed. u shud b asleep 2!! nite!

**(23:54)** _Goodnight, sleep well!_

Souji returns to the textbook after that. He wonders if Yosuke would be mad at him for this, but Yosuke doesn’t get it. Yosuke has nothing to prove. It’s not like Yosuke’s parents only talk to him to ask, ‘ _Are you coping alright at that school?’_ and _‘How are your grades holding up?_ ’

_We don’t want to jeopardise your education_ , his mother had said. _It’ll only be for a year._

He doesn’t know how to tell them he never wants to leave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I considered spending another day editing and re-editing and re-re-editing this but then I thought about how overdue this is and!! So! Here it is!


	16. Chapter 16

**June**

They cut it close with Kanji – by the time they get him out of there, it's been raining for a few days. It’d just about given Yosuke a heart attack to check the forecast half a week ago and hear, “…so whip out your umbrellas, folks, because boy oh _boy_ we’ve got some damp days ahead of us.”

Still, they get it done. Kanji’s shadow is _exhausting_ to fight. And Yosuke gets that it’s a shadow, it’s _meant_ to say embarrassing shit that no one wants to hear, but this one is a lot harder to listen to than any of the others – well, perhaps bar his own. As soon as he gets home he mumbles something to his mum about having dinner later and practically passes out on the couch in his room.

It almost makes sense when he jolts awake later that night, sweat broken out on his forehead, with the golden eyes of his own shadow fading from his mind. _Just a dream…_ he tells himself over and over, sucking in air and waiting for the frantic thumping of his heart to slow. Well, that’s what he gets for trying to sleep on a couch that’s _way_ lumpier than it looks.

He sits up and considers shifting over to his bed instead, but he's a little sick to the stomach – it feels all hollow and constricted – and there’s a dull throb behind his eyes. Looking for a distraction, he listens to the rain pattering on the roof. It’s not as heavy as it was before. Reminds him of one of those ‘sounds of nature’ clips that’s meant to set people at ease, but the longer he listens, the more gross and the more awake he feels.

He checks the time. Twelve thirty… a bit late for dinner, but it might at least set his stomach at ease. What does his mum always say? _A bite to eat and a glass of water goes a long way, Yosuke_. He missed a text while he was asleep, so he takes his phone with him as he creeps to the kitchen.

 **(00:01)** _We did it_.

 _Oh right, the Midnight Channel_ , Yosuke thinks, chewing idly on an apple he’s picked out of the fruit bowl. It’s kind of a soft one – disappointingly uncrunchy. He chucks it out and starts preparing cup ramen instead.

 **(00:43)** i completely slept thru the midnite channel

 **(00:43)** so it was fine? 

He only replies because he has nothing better to do while he waits for the noodles to cook, so it’s totally unexpected when his phone vibrates almost immediately.

 **(00:44)** _Yeah. No one showed up on it._

Good thing, too, because Yosuke thinks he needs a bit of a break. If someone _had_ showed up, he’d have to label the killer as being downright cruel. _You idiot, of course the killer’s cruel_ , he chastises himself, peeking under the lid of the ramen. That’s probably well-done enough, right?

In his attempt to reply to Souji one-handed on the way back to his room, he almost spills the noodles all over himself. It takes all his strength to refrain from swearing loudly right in front of his parents’ room. The resulting text probably isn’t worth the trouble.

 **(00:46)** how come ur up anyway?

And once he’s in his room and sat back on the couch, the ramen safely on the table, he can’t resist adding:

 **(00:47)** i wud spill boiling water on my foot 4 u partner

 **(00:47)** appreciate me

He leans back, picks up the ramen and starts eating. Okay, so maybe he should’ve given them another minute or two. They’ll cook in the water, though – that is, if he doesn’t inhale the entire lot in two seconds.

 **(00:48)** _I’m about to go to sleep. Just wanted to sort out a couple things since I was waiting up for the midnight channel anyway_

 **(00:48)** _What’s this about boiling water? :o_

 **(00:49)** im eating ramen al dente u see

 **(00:49)** u wud not believe the dangers of texting while noodling

 **(00:50)** _You truly know no fear_

 **(00:51)** _Why are you eating right now anyway??_

 **(00:51)** got home and slept lyk a brick for 6 hours. no time 4 dinner in my busy schedule

And with that, the ramen’s finished. At least the soup’s pretty good. Yosuke chucks the cup, once it’s empty, towards the table – it misses and rolls onto the floor, but whatever – and goes over to his window with his phone in the pocket of his jeans. He eases back the curtain but there’s nothing to see out there other than fog. Really, really thick fog, so bad that he can barely discern the outline of the tree that stands a short distance from the window.

It was like this the night Saki died, too. He’d been up late that night to watch the Midnight Channel, and the weather was _just_ like this.

 **(00:55)** u asleep now?

 **(00:57)** _I was just getting changed. In bed now_

 **(00:57)** ah

Yosuke still feels like shit. The noodles, big surprise, aren’t doing anything to help the queasy feeling in his gut. He doesn’t think he’ll be sleeping anytime soon.

 **(00:58)** if ur not quite asleep yet

 **(00:58)** wat did u think of wat kanjis shadow said?

 **(01:00)** _What part?_

 _You’re right, that was a pretty dumb question_ , Yosuke thinks.

 **(01:01)** nvm dont worry about it

It’s not like Souji’s the one who’s just slept for six hours, after all. Yosuke should leave the poor guy alone. Let him get his beauty sleep.

 **(01:03)** _I’ll see you tomorrow then. Goodnight!_

 **(01:04)** nite!!

Yosuke manages to leave the phone alone for a while after that. He tidies up a bit, takes some painkillers and even does some of his homework. But his eyes keep getting drawn back to the window. Really, what _is_ that fog? He’s never seen anything like it outside Inaba.

He wonders what the killer’s thinking right now. He wonders if Kanji will agree to fight alongside them. If it was Yosuke in his place, he doubts he would. He wouldn’t want any reminder of having a shadow like _that_. Well, not that it was completely wrong. It was crude, flamboyant, cringe-inducing, yes – it ticked a whole load of boxes under Yosuke’s mental ‘Hell No’ list. But some of the things it had said…

Yosuke’s brain really isn’t shutting up tonight, so he defaults to his solution to just about everything these days: messaging Souji. Even a sleeping Souji might help him. He wouldn’t put it past him.

 **(01:59)** ‘girls are scary’ thats wat he said rite

 **(01:59)** not as if thats all wrong u no?

He considers making some crack about Chie’s kicks and leaving it at that. But Souji’ll probably see through it. He’s good at doing that, even with texts.

 **(02:00)** those girls at junes the other day were real bitches. they brought saki into the convo

 **(02:01)** idk y. sure dusnt make me want 2 help them out

 **(02:01)** pretty sure they just wanted 2 make me feel lyk a piece of crap

 **(02:02)** sorry i didnt tell u earlier. i no u asked and everything but its not a big deal alrite

 **(02:02)** that isnt my point anyway. its not just girls that assume things and judge and point fingers and say and do terrible shit

 **(02:03)** girls arent scary. EVERYONE is. even if ur not trying to hurt ppl u always hav that potential

 **(02:05)** so y is it so much worse to be alone???

Yosuke’s at the window again, curtains pulled right back. When he looks outside, he feels as if the fog is pressing past the glass, right into his room.

 _So why do people have to_ die _?_

 **(02:06)** _Don’t feel lonely_

The vibration of his phone startles Yosuke out of his thoughts. That really _is_ a reply from Souji. Didn’t he go to bed an hour ago?

 **(02:06)** ur not ASLEEP!!

 **(02:06)** shit did i wake u up

 **(02:06)** _No_

 **(02:07)** _About being alone. I don’t have answers. I think we all ask that question sometime right? But don’t feel lonely_

 **(02:08)** _We’re partners aren’t we?_

Yosuke swallows thickly. This is reminiscent of those days when he really did have no one but Souji – Stranger. Back then, he’d been everything to him.

Who is he kidding? He still sort of is.

 **(02:10)** obviously

He falls asleep pretending his eyes are only stinging because of his stomachache, but lying to himself isn’t coming quite as easy as it used to.

* * *

The next time he properly sees Souji – other than the back of his head all through class – is when the Investigation Team meets up with Kanji after school a few days later. They all look a lot more relaxed after a few days away from the TV World. Yosuke isn’t sure about the others, but that place _really_ puts him on edge.

They’re at their usual table at Junes. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that their sacred meeting spot is this exact table Yosuke’s wiped down what feels like hundreds of times, but here they are. He and Souji end up buying steak for everyone since they’re selling for a bit cheaper today and, as per usual, they start chatting.

“So, what exactly was the deal with you and that boy?” Chie asks through a mouthful of steak.

“Boy?” Kanji responds, also with steak in his mouth. Yosuke’s beginning to wonder if he’s doing something wrong by chewing with his mouth closed.

“The one in the cap,” Yukiko elaborates.

“Oh, uh…” Kanji rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “It wasn’t anything, really. He just asked me a load of stuff like, have I noticed anything weird, or does anything seem different lately. I wasn't really thinking too straight. Next thing I knew, I was asking if I could see him again…"

"To... a boy?" Chie says slowly.

"Man, I dunno what got into me,” Kanji mumbles, ears going red.

“About that – I hate to bring up a sensitive subject,” Yosuke interjects, “But you know how your shadow said that we’d make good boyfriends?” He gestures to Souji and himself. “Did you, uh… mean that?”

“Huh…?” For a moment, Yosuke thinks he’s pissed Kanji off. But then he just snorts. “No offense, Senpai, but _no_.”

“No no no, no offense taken,” Yosuke says quickly, although there _is_ a tiny part of him that’s a little hurt that Kanji had so decisively rejected the very idea. “I was just gonna say, I really don’t swing that way.”

A weird silence falls on the group. Chie and Yukiko exchange a glance. Souji cranes his head to inspect a nearby vending machine.

“Uh, thanks for letting us know, Senpai,” Kanji offers.

“Yeah, I’ll be sure to treasure that piece of information,” Chie says drily.

The conversation moves on to discussing the murders, much to Yosuke’s relief. Souji’s quieter than usual – tired, perhaps? Yosuke knows he’s picked up a few more odd jobs to help pay for all the equipment they take into the TV World, despite all of Yosuke’s offers to help out – he makes a decent amount of money off of Junes and it’s not like he uses it to do anything much other than funding Chie’s massive appetite.

He gives Souji a little nudge with his elbow while Chie’s lamenting about the upcoming camp. “Hey, you holding up alright?”

Souji responds with a tiny smile. “Don’t worry, I’m just listening.”

Yosuke doesn’t think that’s the only reason Souji’s so subdued, but he just nods. It’ll look weird if he presses any further, and he knows he's probably too nosy for his own good anyway.

* * *

Work actually backs off a bit over the next week. There’ve been several new hires, so his dad isn’t quite as insistent about asking Yosuke to pick up extra shifts. He suddenly has a _lot_ of spare time.

What’s slightly weird is that these days Souji doesn’t have any time at all. One day it’s checking up on Kanji, the next it’s basketball practice (Yosuke considers going to watch because he’s just so _bored_ , but figures he’ll look too much like a cheerleader if he does), then Kanji again because apparently they’re inseparable already. After that it’s working the babysitting job (even though Souji keeps telling Yosuke the kids can be a bit of a handful, which is noteworthy in that Souji barely complains about _anything_ ) and today it looks like he’s up to something with Yukiko. Not that Souji tells him personally, or anything, but they leave class together. Some guy sitting behind Yosuke makes a disappointed clicking noise with his tongue.

“Figures she’d be snatched up by the city boy.”

 _And_ I’m _a country bumpkin, huh?_ Yosuke thinks gloomily as he packs his things away. Here he’d thought he’d be lucky enough to never hear any of those annoying Yukiko and Souji rumours again. He considers turning in his seat and announcing that Souji’s not interested in Yukiko at all, thanks, but for some reason the only reaction he can imagine is everyone laughing at him.

Okay, so. No work today. Souji’s busy. There’s no need to worry about the TV World right now and besides, Souji’s _busy_. Shit, is that all he does? Work, fight in some place no one knows exists and hang out with Souji…?

What did he even do _before_ Souji came?

He allows himself to feel bitter for all of a minute before he mentally slaps himself. It’s not Souji’s fault that he has friends, after all. Yosuke can only really blame himself for being this pathetic. He shouldn’t need to have to cling to Souji 24/7 to get any fulfilment out of his life. He resolves to just heading home, figuring it’s been a while since he messed around with his guitar. Maybe he can watch a movie, too – or should he drop by Junes and get that game he’s had his eye on?

He’s so absorbed in his own thoughts, lingering just outside the classroom, he doesn’t realise he’s been approached. “Hey, Yosuke!” It’s Kou, which is sort of a surprise. They’re sort of friends, mostly because of Souji and Chie.

“Hey, what’s up?” Yosuke says.

“You know if Souji’s coming to practice today?” Kou crosses his arms, but he looks relaxed. “I mean, it’s no big deal, but I was hoping to talk to him.”

“Oh…” _Of course._ “I think I just saw him leave with Yukiko.”

“Ah.” Kou shrugs. “That’s alright.” They stand facing each other for a moment in a silence that's just on the side of uncomfortable. “So, what’re your plans for the afternoon? Work?”

“Nah, I’m just gonna muck around at home, I guess.” Yosuke says, trying to affect an air of nonchalance.

Kou opens his mouth to reply, but turns his head when some guys come out of Class 2-3. One of them Yosuke recognises from his own class.

“Oh, it’s you, Hanamura,” that one says. Yosuke casts around in his mind for a name. Uchida? Yeah, that’s it. “You’d know all about Seta and Amagi, huh?” he goes on.

“Why…?” Yosuke asks cautiously.

“Well, you’re all buddy-buddy with Seta, right? You’d know if those two are going out.” The whole group of boys crowds around, now. There's three of them. Kou looks like he’s about to back off, but Yosuke sends him a wide-eyed look and he stays put.

“Uh…” Yosuke turns back to the guys. “We don’t really talk about that stuff. I don’t really have anything to do with it, so…”

“Yeah, as if we’d believe _that_ ,” the shortest of the three scoffs. “Everyone knows you two are tight. Just let us know, alright? We're only curious.”

“Or is it Chie he’s after?” the last of them, a weaselly looking guy with dyed blonde hair says. The grin on his face is a bit lewd for Yosuke’s liking. Kou visibly stiffens. “I mean, no idea why when it looks like he’s got Yukiko at his beck and call, but some people are actually into tomboys, right?”

“Hey, who says he’s not playing the both of them?” the short one laughs.

Yosuke is suddenly, vividly, reminded of his friends in the city. They’d talked just like this, and at the time Yosuke hadn’t seen any harm in it. It hadn’t been malicious – just talk among guys. But…

“Shut up,” he snaps, crossing his arms and squaring his shoulders. “You don’t know him at _all_. He’s nothing like that.”

“Woah, no need to get so _weird_ about it,” weasel-dude says, lifting his hands placatingly. “It must be tough, huh? You’re from the city too but none of the girls here give you the time of the day. We get it – you don’t have to be defensive about it.”

“Yeah, you’ve only known him for like two months, anyway, and he’s a mysterious guy. He probably has all sorts of secrets – do you _really_ think you know him? He’s a little bit on the shady side, wouldn’t you say?” Uchida says, sounding as if he thinks he’s made some great insight.

"You saw him with Kanji Tatsumi the other day, right? Maybe he's a delinquent too. That'd explain why his parents abandoned him out here in the middle of nowhere."

"Ooh, you could be onto something! Chicks  _do_ dig the bad guys, right?" The three of them laugh raucously among each other, then look expectantly at Yosuke.

He’s sick of this. “I don’t think you get it at all,” he says through gritted teeth. He has just enough rationality left to know that causing a scene is _really_ not a smart idea. “That’s my partner you’re talking about. My best friend. You’re talking to the wrong person if you want to get away with talking shit about him.”

“We were just-“

“He’s just trying to help everyone out and get along with them! Is there really anything so wrong with that?!”

“Geez… alright, then…” Looking thoroughly put off, the blonde one takes a step back. “Whatever. For all we know, you’re only saying this because you’re pretty much a nobody without him, huh? It’s not like Chie or Yukiko would bother talking to you if he hadn’t taken pity on you for whatever reason.”

Yosuke sucks in a breath. Kou, off to the side, shifts uncomfortably. “Say whatever you want about me, but leave Souji alone,” Yosuke says, the fight draining out of him.

“Wow, I didn’t think you were gonna be _this_ pathetic about it. It’s kinda sad,” the short guy says. “Do you lie down and take it when people tell you Inaba would be better off if you and your family didn’t exist as well?”

“ _Shut up!_ ”

And what the _hell_ , Souji’s here, pounding down the hallway towards them. He looks really out of breath.

“Took you long enough,” Kou exclaims as Souji comes to a stop in front of them. The guys back off a bit, looking alarmed for the first time since they’d started spouting their bullshit.

“Don’t say things like that to Yosuke,” Souji says to them, eyes narrowed. If Yosuke didn’t know better, he’d be intimidated himself.

“Uh, sorry, don’t know what came over me,” Uchida mutters. He glances back at his friends and they seem to come to some silent agreement. “We’ll be going now, then.”

Yosuke watches the three of them disappear down the hallway. The tension doesn’t leave his shoulders until they head down the stairs and out of sight.

“I think they’re half-convinced you’re in a gang,” Yosuke says, passing a hand through his hair sheepishly.

“Possibly. That was too easy…” Souji’s frowning now. “Thanks for letting me know,” he adds, turning to Kou.

“Wait, what?” Yosuke thinks he’s missing something here.

Kou grins. “We-ell, I figured Souji would know how to make those guys shut up, so I shot him a text once they _really_ started getting on my nerves. Surprised you got here so quick though,” he adds, shooting Souji a look of respect.

“I hadn’t gone too far,” Souji shrugs. “And Yukiko didn’t mind. We weren’t doing anything too important anyway. So… what exactly did I miss?”

“Nothing, really,” Yosuke tries. He doesn’t really want Souji to know he’d almost lost it earlier over a few guys running their mouths. It somehow seems disappointing – he can keep his cool discussing murders and killing shadows, but not over this?

Evidently, Kou doesn’t agree. “What’re you on about, Yosuke? Hey, Souji, he was actually pretty cool, you know? I didn’t expect it out of him.” Kou claps Yosuke on the back in an easy, friendly way. “Those guys were saying a whole lot of crap about you and this guy defended your honour. What was it – _that’s my partner you’re talking about_ –“

“ _Dude_ , you don’t need to make it sound so embarrassing!” Yosuke interrupts, trying not to cringe.

“It wasn’t, though. Well, anyway, I actually should be heading off – I’ll see you in practice next time, yeah, Souji?” Kou gives Souji a half-smile and lifts a hand in farewell as he backs away a few steps, then turns and jogs down the hall.

“So, uh…” Yosuke scratches the back of his neck. “Going to catch up with Yukiko, now?”

Souji’s staring at him thoughtfully. “Actually… are you free this afternoon, Yosuke?”

* * *

Souji takes him to the riverbank and they sit side-by-side in the grass, well away from the other townspeople out and about. The heat’s really amping up these days – Yosuke kinds of wants to just throw himself into the river. It’s definitely an appealing option, since it means he can both cool down _and_ escape the weird sideways looks Souji keeps giving him. They’d only talked about really trivial things all the way here, but it’s obvious he has more to say.

“Did you really stick up for me?” is the first thing he asks after they’ve sat down.

“Well, yeah? They were saying all kinds of shit and none of it was true. Pissed me off.” Yosuke mumbles the last part, frowning at the grass. It’s so green it kind of hurts his eyes.

Souji stays quiet for a long time. “Thank you,” he says.

“You don’t need to thank me – hell, I should thank you. You were the one who actually scared them off.”

Souji snorts. “I don’t think _that_ requires thanking. I couldn’t even think of what to say. I just ended telling them to shut up, huh…?” He shifts a little so he’s facing Yosuke fully. For some reason, he can’t help but notice the incredibly respectful distance that Souji’s left between them. He’d only just been getting used to Souji sitting so _close_ all the time. “Still… I’m glad I did,” Souji continues, his voice lowered now. “I’m glad I was here to do it, this time. It always killed me, knowing people were saying things about you and I couldn’t make them stop.”

Yosuke manages to meet Souji’s eyes for all of a second before he looks back at the grass again. His heart’s racing – god this is _stupid_ , this is just like how it was all those months ago, why won’t this _go away_?

“You don’t need to do anything like that,” he manages to choke out. He takes a deep breath, tries to steady his voice. “Ever since we started talking, I started caring less about that kind of stuff anyway. Like, I dunno. I started believing it all less.”

“Still, I wanted to do this,” Souji says firmly. “Also… you should defend yourself too, Yosuke. You’re worth a lot more than their words.”

“But what can I even _say_ to someone telling me it might be better if I don’t exist? Like, ‘hey man, it’s within my rights as a human to exist so screw you’? I don’t think there’s even a good comeback. Hell, maybe they’re right. If Junes wasn’t here, Saki wouldn’t have…” He grits his teeth.

“Without you, Yukiko and Kanji could’ve died.”

“What?”

Souji’s got a very serious look on his face, the one he wears when he’s facing down shadows or about to take an exam. “Honestly speaking, even if I’d discovered the TV World, without you around I don’t think I would’ve investigated it any further. I would’ve tried to ignore it. This team we have wouldn’t exist if not for the part you played. Inaba is _far_ better off thanks to you.”

“But you’re the only one who could go into the TVs in the first place…”

“Yosuke, I’m saying that _by myself_ I wouldn’t have done a thing about it! And if you didn’t exist, I…” Souji’s visibly distressed now. His hands, clasped on his lap, are shaking.

“I get it,” Yosuke says, reaching out to place a hand on top of Souji’s. And he’s not just saying that – he actually sort of does. “We’re partners.”

Souji smiles wryly, staring down at their hands. “Well put.”

Yosuke retracts his hand quickly - he’s not going to make the mistake of holding onto Souji for too long again – and runs his tongue over the back of his teeth, not sure what to say now. He settles on changing the subject, since it’s his first time hanging out alone with Souji in ages and the mood shouldn’t be so damn _heavy_. “You don’t really have a thing for Yukiko _or_ Chie though, right? Those guys kept going on about it.”

There’s a long silence, then, “ _No_ ,” Souji says firmly, letting out a long breath. “What, do you?”

Yosuke’s glad that Souji’s going along with it, cause apparently he still sucks at trying to have serious conversations, whether via text or not. “Nah. I don’t think I’ve even seen the point in thinking about it since Chie tricked me all those months ago. And honestly? I didn’t think you liked either of them either. You wouldn’t hang around with Kanji so much if you were _actually_ into them. That’d just be unproductive.”

“Kanji?” Souji sounds surprised at that. “Well… he’s good company, despite all appearances.”

 _Well, just don’t forget your best friend over here, alright_ , Yosuke thinks at Souji, well aware that he’d sound very much like one of those clingy, irritating friends if he were to say it out loud. “Surprisingly, he’s a really decent guy, yeah,” is what he actually says, and Souji smiles.

* * *

Unfortunately, Souji doesn’t look quite so happy after Kanji sprints out of their tent several days later at the camp-out, apparently driven out by what Yosuke had thought was a harmless attempt at teasing.

“Let’s just hope Morooka doesn’t catch him,” he sighs, sitting back down.

“I should’ve kept my big fat mouth shut, huh…” Yosuke mutters. “Well, whatever. I never told him he actually had to _leave_.”

Souji hums thoughtfully. “Why’d you say that anyway?”

“What do you mean?”

“That whole ‘will we be safe in the tent with you’ thing – were you… actually worried?” Souji sounds like he’s choosing his words carefully.

“Uh…” Yosuke fidgets under Souji’s scrutiny. “I dunno. I was kinda looking forward to having the tent to ourselves, you know? Staying up late, talking about random shit, the whole…” _Wait, that’s not the point_. “Anyway, it’s not like I can erase all my memories of our, um, encounters with that shadow of his.”

“That was a shadow,” Souji points out. “A gross exaggeration designed to make you want to reject it, right?”

…Right. Yosuke’s been there, done that himself, and all. He puffs out his cheeks.

“Even if Kanji were gay, would it be an issue?”

Yosuke stiffens. _Way to get right to the point, Partner…_ There’s something awfully jarring about the word _gay_. He feels like most people – himself included – just dance around it.

“We’re a team, after all. And Kanji’s kind of touchy about this.” Souji’s really got his Leader Voice on right now, Yosuke notices.

“No, I really don’t care,” he says finally. And he _doesn’t_. Kanji’s a great guy and a real asset to their team – Yosuke’s fully aware.

“So why do you…” Souji sighs and trails off. He doesn’t finish his question, but Yosuke gets the drift.

The truth is, he doesn’t know. It’s not something he’s ever had to think very hard about – not something anyone’s ever given him any _reason_ to think about. He recalls his old friends – well, his not-friends, honestly, since it’s not like they’ve even exchanged a single message in months – making jibes at this one slender, pretty kid in the year below them.

_With a face like that, there’s no doubt about which team he bats for._

_Anyone sharing a changing room with him better watch out, huh?_

They’d never said any of it to the kid’s face. Still, they’d said it all out loud and laughed about it and Yosuke really hadn’t thought anything of it. That’s just the sort of stuff people like _that_  have to deal with for being that way. Right…?

So why are the memories suddenly so discomforting?

“What do _you_ think, Souji?” he says finally, diverting the question because yeah, he’s a coward.

“I think we’re all _people_.” Souji shifts onto his knees and flattens out his bedding with the palms of his hands as he talks. “No matter what lives we lead.”

_What’s that meant to be an answer to anyway?_

“It’s just,” Yosuke flounders, “I have no personal issue with Kanji, alright? Like it’s fine. Even if he swings _that_ way. But most people think it’s kind of… not right.”

“Just because a lot of people think something, doesn’t mean you have to agree.” Souji’s pulling a spare jacket out of his bag and folding it into a makeshift pillow. He’s very meticulous about it, ensuring the sleeves are tucked in just right. “I mean, after having to fight four shadows, I’ve come to the conclusion that one of the most important things in life is acceptance. Of yourself, of everyone else. To just be understanding and forgiving where you can. But not everyone would agree with me, of course.”

Yosuke’s mouth is sort of dry. Probably because of those animal crackers he'd eaten earlier. “It’s moments like now that I can really see why you charm the pants off basically everyone you meet,” he says quietly, his fingers curling into fists. _This really_ is _the same guy who bothered you with weird questions about the meaning of friendship a few months ago_ , he reminds himself.

“Hm…?” Souji gives Yosuke a sideways glance. He looks soft and sleepy and Yosuke kind of regrets opening his mouth because he doesn’t really know how to follow up on his own words. He just looks at Souji, and Souji looks back.

Luckily for him, Chie chooses that moment to interrupt with, “You guys, are you there?” and Souji, with a weirdly pained expression, goes to unzip the tent.

* * *

The night they leave the mountains, Yosuke decides it’s very much time to text Souji. He’d wanted to ask him something the night they’d stayed up there, but there was absolutely no signal and he knew he’d disturb the girls if he asked out loud.

So he asks now.

 **(22:59)** alrite i cant take it anymore. tell me ur secret. how did u go from not bothering making any friends to being mister charisma, befriending the entire town

 **(23:00)** (including that granny who likes to walk by the riverbank dont think i missed seeing u 2 having a gud old chat)

 **(23:05)** _Nice old ladies are some of the best humans around, it’s not weird. She gave me love advice._

 **(23:05)** _As for why I’m making friends, you of all people should know that. Didn't I already tell you this story?_

 **(23:06)** _I made friends with this one guy called Wrono. Kind of a strange name, right?_

 **(23:07)** _That’s when I realised reaching out to people and learning about them is worth it. That Wrono guy helped to open my mind a little bit._

 **(23:09)** wrono huh? thats not just a strange name, its a crappy one

 **(23:10)** _It’s a good thing I have a Yosuke instead now then, isn’t it?_

 **(23:10)** _Speaking of Yosukes, I was thinking of going with a Yosuke to Okina_

 **(23:11)** o yea? the souji seeks a return to a likeness of his natural city habitat?

 **(23:12)** _Something like that, yes. Do you think there’d be any Yosukes partial to the plan?_

 **(23:13)** ok u weirdo. of course ill go

 **(23:15)** _:)_

* * *

A few afternoons earlier, well before the camping trip, Souji’s sitting with Kanji under the shade of the gazebo. The sun’s out, the sky’s blue and Souji knows Yosuke isn’t busy right now, but he needs _this_ today.

“I mean, I’m not the feelings type – dude, you saw my shadow, I don’t even have a clue what’s going on with myself – but even I can see Yosuke-senpai thinks the world of you,” Kanji tells him. “It’s kinda like you two’ve known each other forever. You sure you only met this year?”

“I _know_ he sees me as his best friend, but…” Souji lets out a hollow laugh. “Sorry about this. I don’t know who else to talk to.”

“Least I can do after you pulled me outta that bathhouse,” Kanji says with a shrug. “Besides, Yosuke-senpai’s probably just confused. I know what it feels like to be worried you might, uh… swing _that_ way… or whatever.” His voice is a bit gruffer now. “But I should thank you Senpai. I don’t have myself figured out all that well, but you make me feel like that doesn’t really matter.”

“It _doesn’t_ matter,” Souji assures him. It’s something he _has_ to say – he doesn’t even consider his options. After all, where does _he_ stand if it’s necessary to know himself?

“Anyway, don’t worry so much. Sometimes you just gotta go for it, right? Do whatever you do when you like someone.”

“I… don’t really know,” Souji confesses. “Isn’t it better to just let things stay as they are, if it’s good like this?”

“Well, you _like_ him, right?”

Souji lets out a breath in a long _whoosh_. Yes, he does, more than Kanji even realises. He likes Yosuke so much, so much more than he even liked the idea of Wrono he’d held in his mind over all those months. But Yosuke’s far more complex than Wrono had ever seemed, his actions so often seeming to contradict his words. And Souji has no experience in this.

“If you do, you should trust your gut. Do whatever you want to. I haven’t known you long, Senpai, but I think you of all people can make it work out.”

Souji recalls something now – wandering the city streets after school, peering into stationery shops and cafés and bookstores, in his mind wondering all the things Wrono would say if he’d been there. Wrono wouldn’t have been easily impressed, he’d thought back then. After all, they were both city boys originally.

“Thank you, Kanji… I might have an idea.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back, back again
> 
> Okay but in all seriousness, I didn't leave much of an author's note last time because I was sort of internally screaming and really nervous?? I just want to say a really huge thank you to everyone who left a comment on chapter 14. I know I'm not obligated to reply to each one - I guess I just like letting you know how grateful I am. :') But I figure another update is more exciting than a reply from me, so let me just assure you I've read them all and that they made my heart flutter~
> 
> I'm so sorry for leaving you hanging so long, if you've been waiting since the last update (and by that I mean waiting since chapter 14, not since chapter 15 cause yEAH I did manage to update within less than a week this time can anyone believe this). I hope you're still enjoying these dumb boys and their antics!
> 
> (p.s. something that may be of interest - the fic wasn't originally intended to continue to this point in the canon. it was supposed to pretty much be wrapped up before kanji joined the team, but I'm a sucker for drawing things out I guess. long author's note is long I'll stop here)


	17. Chapter 17

**June**

What Yosuke didn’t realise, when he agreed to go to Okina, was that it would result in his being on a train at eight a.m. on a Sunday. “We’re not going to have enough time otherwise,” Souji had reasoned over the phone to Yosuke the previous night. “Both of us get pretty busy over the week and you never know when someone else might show up on the Midnight Channel.”

And now Yosuke’s here, yawning what feels like every two seconds and struggling not to slump over onto Souji’s shoulder. “Are you sure a few extra hours is gonna be worth being awake right now?” he mumbles thickly through another yawn.

“Yeah, there’s lots to do,” Souji says confidently, but Yosuke doesn’t miss that he blinks drowsily and rubs his eyes every time he thinks Yosuke isn’t looking.

“Why’d you want to do this all of a sudden anyway?” Yosuke lifts his arms above his head in a stretch. If there’s one nice thing about going at this time of day and on a Sunday, it’s that the train’s pretty empty. Less commuters, less other teenagers like themselves off to spend a day in the city since Yosuke’s pretty sure anyone in their right mind is _asleep_.

 “I don’t know…” Souji shifts in his seat. “No, it’s not that. It’s just a bit embarrassing, is all.”

“The famous Souji Seta, Inaba’s number one bachelor, embarrassed?” Yosuke turns to Souji with a teasing grin. He suddenly feels a whole lot more awake.

“God, don’t put it like _that_.” But Souji looks quietly pleased. “Don’t laugh, alright?”

“Cross my heart,” Yosuke says solemnly, doing the motions over his chest and all.

“I just started thinking back to when I lived in the city. You remember I didn’t really bother to have friends, right?”

“I think your within the minute response times testified to that,” Yosuke nods, then jumps when Souji pokes him hard in the shoulder. “What? It’s not like you were the only one!”

“ _Anyway_. Sometimes I would walk around the city by myself and just look at all the places where people our age go to enjoy themselves and…” Souji breaks off, making a disgruntled face. “I imagined scenarios where you were there?” His voice curls uncertainly on the last word. Before Yosuke can say anything, Souji continues in a rush. “And Okina’s not exactly where I used to live, but it’s the closest thing right now. I thought it would be fun. We deserve to enjoy ourselves, right?”

“…Right.” Yosuke bites his lower lip to stop himself from smiling. He wonders if Souji’s shown anyone else this side of him yet – the less certain, rambling side that reminds him so much of Stranger’s long and eloquent messages. “It’s a good idea. And we haven’t hung out much recently, so, uh. It’s not so bad that we’re going in so early.”

“We’re awake this early most days for school anyway,” Souji says, lips curved up in amusement.

“That sounds like _adult_ logic,” Yosuke points out and Souji just shakes his head at him, the smile never disappearing from his face.

* * *

“Okay, so… where first?”

Okina is incredibly empty, surprise surprise. Most of the shops have only just opened. A couple of other early shoppers are loitering outside the shops.

”I don’t mind,” Souji replies.

“Oh, come on, it was _your_ idea. You come up with something.”

“Hmm…” Souji smiles slightly. “I heard a cat café opened here this month.”

Yosuke’s not surprised in the slightest by this suggestion. “Where?”

“It’s a bit of a walk. We should go later. There’s also…” Souji looks back and forth over the closest storefronts. “The movies? Is there anything you want to see?”

“Not that I know of.” Yosuke heads over to stand in front of the screen displaying the currently showing titles, Souji trailing behind. He’s heard of one of them – an action film – purely through seeing terrible reviews on the internet. “Have you heard of any of these?”

Souji blinks at the list. “Oh, Yukiko wants to see that one.”

“Probably a chick flick then – let’s not.”

“What’s this one? The title…” Yosuke looks at where Souji is pointing. ‘ _Terror_ _of the Zombie Baboon : The Resurrection’_? He tries not to laugh.

“That would be a horror movie… I think?” It’s a little on the bizarre side, but Yosuke’s sat through enough horror with his friends in the city to know a horror title when he sees one.

“I’ve never seen a horror movie before,” Souji comments. And it doesn’t _sound_ like he’s hinting at anything, but…

“Do you wanna see that one, then?” Yosuke asks, and Souji nods. “Uh, wow. I didn’t know zombie baboons were your thing.”

“I’m curious,” Souji says simply. “Look, the first showing’s at ten. That’s only an hour away.”

“Wait, horror at ten in the morning? Doesn’t that kind of… defy conventions?” Yosuke says weakly. But Souji’s already heading over to purchase the tickets. Well, at least they’ll be alone in the movie theatre – there’ll be no one to hear Yosuke scream, if by some miracle the zombie baboons manage to actually scare him.

* * *

They muck around in a department store for a while. Yosuke, in an attempt to spite Souji for losing his sleep-in, tries out beds until a clerk comes by and assumes he’s here to make a purchase. He gets out of there as soon as possible after she eyes the two of them and starts recommending doubles.

“That’s so unprofessional,” Yosuke mutters.

Souji doesn’t seem to hear him. They’ve somehow ended up in the toys aisle and he’s looking at something with great fascination. “Do you think Nanako would like those?” he asks. Yosuke follows his gaze.

“Oh, those are Phoenix Ranger Featherman R figurines,” he notes. “I totally didn’t waste several days of my holiday watching that.”

“It’s okay,” Souji says, picking the yellow one. “I once spent eight hours watching infomercials when I was sick.”

They head to a bookstore next. Souji pores over the books on the Top 50 shelf, even the ones Yosuke’s 95% certain are exclusively popular with preteen girls.

“Buy some while you’re here,” Yosuke suggests. “I mean, since Inaba doesn’t have a library or anything and our own bookstore’s pretty tiny.”

“I’m a bit busy to be reading,” Souji says doubtfully, but he’s running his fingers over the spine of the one he’s holding right now. 

“You can never be too busy to read,” Yosuke says wisely, ushering him over to the counter while Souji’s still holding the book.

“And when was the last time _you_ picked up a book?” Souji says with a chuckle. He buys the book anyway, holding the plastic bag close to his chest.

* * *

Souji’s really full of enthusiasm today. He practically powerwalks back to the movie theatre ten minutes before it’s even due to start, purchases popcorn, then drags Yosuke to Cinema 3 since he’s apparently just not walking fast enough.

“Why are you so keen?” Yosuke says through a mouthful of popcorn. He’s not worried about embarrassing himself. The cinema is completely empty except for the two of them and the ads aren’t even showing yet.

“I get the feeling that the ability to withstand a horror movie could be a precious life skill,” Souji says, eyes fixed on the black screen.

“Surely we get enough horror in the TV World? I mean some of those shadows…” Yosuke laughs, amused. “Well, whatever. Let’s see how much of a man you really are, Partner.”

They sit through the ads and when the reminder for all viewers to please turn off their cellphones comes on, Souji sends Yosuke a tiny smile, the edges of his lips just quirked up. The room darkens and Yosuke stuffs another handful of popcorn into his mouth, mentally preparing himself as he does so.

In the end, watching Souji turns out to be a much more interesting experience than the movie itself. Yosuke sits on a bit of an angle so he can keep an eye on both at the same time. He ends up polishing off most of the popcorn while Souji sits very still, focussing intently on the screen, his face scrunching up in confusion at the particularly bad bits of dialogue. He even flinches once, at the moment the first zombie baboon comes crashing out of the closet, and Yosuke has to mask his laughter by pretending to choke on popcorn. Souji doesn’t even tear his eyes away to ask if he’s alright.

“So what’d you think?” Yosuke asks when the credits start rolling.

“I think I’ve seen about 50 types of shadow scarier than any of the zombie baboons,” Souji says after a moment’s consideration.

“Isn’t that basically what I said earlier…?” Yosuke shakes his head with a grin. “Trust me, Partner. There’s better stuff out there than this. I’ll put together a few – maybe we could gather the team once this is done and all shit ourselves together?”

“Choose one with bugs,” Souji suggests as they get up and start filing back out.

“Bugs…?”

“Chie hates bugs.”

Yosuke laughs delightedly. “I didn’t know you had that kind of evil in you!”

“Oh… don’t tell her, alright?” But Souji’s eyes are sparkling with mischief, even as he says it.

* * *

Souji insists on getting lunch before heading to the cat café because, “Yosuke, we’re going to be way too busy petting cats to be thinking about food or drink.” Well, that’s alright. Yosuke hears they don’t really serve anything decent at those cafés anyway.

They both order burgers – actually, Souji just tells the waitress, “I’ll take the same as him, thank you,” gesturing at Yosuke – and settle in to wait. Yosuke gets a milkshake while Souji gets coffee, which would look real mature except he takes it with cream and sugar.

“You didn’t seem too fazed by the movie,” Souji comments. He takes a tentative sip of coffee and sighs contentedly, tipping his head back a little. Yosuke determinedly drains his milkshake through the entire display.

“My old friends liked trying to out-man each other a lot. I mean, not like Kanji, but…” Yosuke tilts his head to one side. “One of our ideas of fun was sitting in a dark room watching terrifying shit and making a competition out of who looked the least scared.”

“Did you like it?” Souji’s got both hands wrapped around his mug and he keeps taking tiny, darting sips like he’s a bird, or something. His eyes are fixed on Yosuke over the rim of the mug.

“Yeah, I guess. It’s not like I’d sit and do it alone, but it’s fun to do dumb stuff like that with other people, right?” Souji looks intrigued, so Yosuke presses on. “Beats sitting alone and watching TV and surfing the internet. Most of the time it did, anyway.”

“Do you miss that?” Souji curls his fingers a little tighter around the mug and Yosuke tracks the motion. “We don’t really do things like that.”

Yosuke taps a finger on the edge of the table thoughtfully. “Nah, I don’t miss it. I did at first, of course, along with everything else in the city, but… Inaba’s a good place. And the friends I have now…” His eyes dart down to the table. “I get the feeling what we’ve got is a lot more genuine, even if I have to live in constant fear of Chie kicking my ass or Yukiko kicking my ego.”

Souji hums under his breath. “I want to do silly things with you all, all of us together, but…”

“Let me guess – the murders? School?”

Souji nods with a wry smile, setting his coffee down. He’s still only drunk half of it. “It’s still so much better than I’d ever fathomed, though, murders aside.”

“I’m glad, Partner. Things seemed kinda dull for you back then.” Yosuke shifts in his seat. There’s something weird about bringing this up – Souji right now seems untouchable, and though they often bring up the jokes they’d shared and the details they remember, they don’t really cross into territory like the way Souji used to talk about himself and his life. Because _how_ does anyone just talk about stuff like that?

It’s probably lucky that their lunch arrives then. “Oh, thanks – man, this looks _good_ ,” Yosuke exclaims, unable to help himself from grinning. Souji offers the waitress a gracious smile and Yosuke can’t help but notice that she flutters around their table for longer than is probably necessary.

A little more time goes by, like that.

* * *

_So this is what it looks like when someone meets their soulmate_ , Yosuke thinks.

Said soulmate belongs to Souji and comes in the form of a small, ginger kitten. It had immediately rejected Yosuke – does he _smell_ or something? – but it seems to like Souji just fine. He’s sat cross-legged on the floor and the kitten’s rubbing its skinny body all over his knees. It’s producing a purr so loud that Yosuke can hardly believe it’s coming from something that small, but he doesn’t see any lawnmowers or tractors in here, so it’s got to be the kitten.

“So this is your personal heaven, huh? I’ll know where to take you on your birthday,” Yosuke comments as he joins Souji on the floor. He’s surprised by a cat that drifts over to him, nosing at his elbow with interest.

“When’s _your_ birthday?” Souji asks, seemingly breaking out of his reverie. He’s still got one finger tickling under the kitten’s chin, though, and his other hand’s tangled in the fur of a fluffy white cat. Yosuke can’t deny it’s really pretty, for a cat.

“Um… in like three days, actually.” No one in Inaba knows save his parents, come to think of it.

Souji’s apparently so surprised he forgets to keep petting the cats. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“It doesn’t matter. We’ll have school and I might have work that day.” Yosuke tries to make himself busy petting the one cat that’s actually staying by his side, but he can’t help peeking at Souji. “...My dad’ll probably let me off though, if I ask.”

“Ask,” Souji says firmly, before going back to accumulating cats. There’s four on him now – no, five, because there’s a black one settling beneath one of Souji’s knees that’s easy to miss. It’s actually kind of incredible to watch. Souji murmurs to them so quietly that Yosuke can’t distinguish what he’s saying, but he can hear the tone well enough. He doesn’t think he’s ever heard Souji speak so kindly to anyone or anything before. His hands move almost reverently over the cats and his face glows with affection.

 _God, he looks so happy,_ Yosuke thinks. He tries to ignore the fluttering sensation in his stomach.

The tabby sitting next to Yosuke butts impatiently at his arm and mewls plaintively. “Yeah, yeah,” he mumbles, rubbing its head.

They spend a while like that, and Yosuke can’t deny that he likes it there a lot more than he’d expected to. Go figure.

* * *

Once their time’s up in the cat café and Yosuke’s talked Souji out of paying for the both of them to spend another two hours there – they need to catch the train back at four and there won’t be enough time to walk back to the station if they do that – they find themselves in a music store. It’s actually the same place Yosuke had bought his guitar, and it’s not like he needs a new one or anything but it’s always nice to look around.

“You play trumpet, right?” Yosuke comments. They’re in the guitar section right now, Souji following Yosuke around without looking as if he has any intention to explore the shop on his own.

“Kind of? It’s an extracurricular, not a passion,” Souji admits.

“Ooh, you should show me your skills. The brass section’s right over there.” Yosuke jerks a thumb in the approximate direction.

“Yosuke, it’s not like I can just take a trumpet and start playing it in the middle of the store.”

“It’d be funny though, right?” Yosuke sends Souji a teasing smile over his shoulder, then looks back at the guitar he’s been examining for a while now. It’s a nicer variety than the one he’s got now – of course, it’s also about five times as expensive.

“Don’t you already have a guitar?” Souji asks, as if reading Yosuke’s mind.

“Yeah, that yellow thing propped up in my room.”

“What, your bike?”

“Ha ha, very funny.” Yosuke closes his eyes and reminds himself that having a job doesn’t necessarily mean he can blow his money. “Hey, can we check out the acoustics while we’re here?”

Looking at acoustic guitars does make him feel a little better. He doesn’t really have any intention of ever owning one – they just don’t look as _cool_.

“Play something,” Souji suggests.

“What? I can’t just start making noise...”

“There’s a guy over there playing,” Souji points out, and yeah, he’s right, but Yosuke’s also keenly aware that that guy is far more talented than he is. For starters, he probably practices more than once a week, unlike Yosuke.

Somehow, he ends up seated with a guitar anyway, Souji standing back and looking at Yosuke with that stupid, attentive expression of his. That one that makes it look like he’s watching the most fascinating thing on earth, which is obviously impossible right now since all that’s in front of him is Yosuke and his kind of average guitar abilities.

He ends up getting a little absorbed in it, once he reassures himself that it’s only Souji there and that Souji won’t ever judge him even if he sucks ass. He doesn’t try anything elaborate, especially since he’s not really used to the weight of this guitar on his lap or the tension of the strings. He plucks a gentle melody – one he learned off a video tutorial on the internet when he was just getting started. When he finishes, he looks up and Souji’s face has changed. There’s affection there now, just like there’d been with the cats, and he doesn’t bother to hide it even though he knows Yosuke’s looking at him.

“We’d better get going,” Yosuke says weakly, feeling as if his stomach’s dropped. He looks away, stands and puts the guitar back. He does it all pretty steadily, despite the way his mind’s racing.

“Yeah,” Souji agrees quietly.

* * *

The train ride back is pretty quiet. Yosuke slips his headphones over Souji’s ears and, with some trepidation, plays him a few tracks he thinks the other boy might like. He unhelpfully tells Yosuke that he loves them all. So much for getting any idea of Souji’s tastes.

They make it back to Inaba as the sun’s setting. Yosuke kind of can’t believe that they really _did_ spent the whole day in Okina without getting bored. It’s not that exciting of a city, after all.

“Well, thanks, Partner,” he says, shoving his hands into his jean pockets.

“What for?”

“Thinking this up. Inviting me.”

Souji just nods and smiles contentedly. “Thanks for saying yes. And for dragging yourself here at eight in the morning”

They look at each other for a while. Yosuke wonders if Souji’s expecting him to say something else, or if they’re just meant to say bye and head their separate ways now. The moment feels… _loaded_.

“Your future girlfriend’s really lucky,” is what finally comes out of his mouth.

“Wha-?” Souji looks shocked and Yosuke shifts from foot to foot, embarrassed.

“Geez, I didn’t mean anything weird by it. It’s just… it was a great time. And whoever she is, she’s lucky that you’ll be taking her on dates all the time.” He looks at his shoes. His left shoelace looks like it’s about to come undone.

“I… don’t think it works like that. With anyone else.”

 _What the hell is_ that _supposed to mean_? Yosuke peeks at Souji out of the corner of his eye. He’s looking at the ground too, arms kind of stiff at his sides.

“Right. I’m your partner. You’re only allowed fun with me,” Yosuke ends up saying and it sounds like he’s trying to make a joke. “Well, uh… my parents are expecting me for dinner. I’ll see you at school tomorrow.”

“See you,” Souji says, smiling.

Yosuke knows him well enough by now to be able to tell when his smiles don’t reach his eyes.

* * *

Yosuke’s awake when the clock ticks over onto his birthday, but he doesn’t really think about it until after he and Souji are done discussing the images on the Midnight Channel and Souji murmurs a quiet, “Happy birthday, Yosuke,” before hanging up.

A few minutes later, he receives a text.

 **(00:17)** _Happy birthday Yosuke. I just said that, didn’t I? Happy birthday Wrono, my best friend, my Partner. I know there’s not really going to be time to celebrate thanks to the killer’s timing but I hope we can make it a special day. :)_

Yosuke has to grit his teeth against the sensation of his stomach in knots.

And even though they have to spend the day in school and the afternoon talking to Risette – which isn’t such a bad thing in itself – Yosuke doesn’t forget the message. At the end of the day, Souji hands him a container he must’ve been lugging around all day. It’s full of curry.

“This is the recipe I made when I listened to the playlist you made for me,” is his explanation. “It’s not much, but… I can promise another outing to Okina?”

“It’s a deal,” Yosuke says, throat very dry.

All in all, it’s one of his better birthdays.

* * *

As always, time spent in the dungeons flies and before Yosuke’s remotely ready, it’s exam season again.

“Yosuke, I hate to say this, but… have you done any study yet? At all?”

Yosuke wonders just how on earth he should respond to Souji’s question. He kind of wants to brush it off with a, “Yeah! Of _course_!” But that would also be a lie, and Souji’s twisted around in his chair, looking back at Yosuke with a stupidly endearing and earnest look of concern.

“Yes,” he says anyway.

Souji continues to look at him.

“Alright, _alright_ , no, I haven’t,” he mutters, looking down at his desk. The patterns in the wood are really riveting today.

“Hmm.” Souji taps his fingers on the back of his chair and Yosuke continues to refuse to look at him. “Okay, well, I can try to help you out. Stay over at mine tonight.”

“Huh?” Yosuke’s head shoots up. “Is that alright?”

“Yeah, I don’t see why not. I asked my uncle and he said I can have you around so long as we make sure Nanako’s alright. We have a spare futon, too.”

Yosuke checks his mental calendar. “Well, I’m not working, so I guess I could. My dad’ll probably rejoice if I tell him how good your grades are, so I’ll be able to come.”

“So that’s a yes?”

“It’s a yes.” Things around Souji have been a little different since Okina, but it's not like he's going to turn down the offer.

Souji smiles faintly at him – Yosuke will never cease to wonder how Souji packs so much emotion into such a tiny movement – and turns back to face the front. Perfect timing – King Moron’s just entered the room.

 **(08:33)** were not JUST goin 2 study tho rite?

 **(08:35)** _I make no promises._

 **(08:36)** were not ALL as strong as u!!

Yosuke then notices that Chie’s looking back and forth between them. He gives her the most cordial nod he can manage.

“Are you two texting?” she hisses at Souji, leaning in such a way that Yosuke can just barely hear her.

Souji just nods. Chie looks back over her shoulder at Yosuke and raises an eyebrow, glancing down towards where he’s concealing the phone under his desk.

 _You’re not thinking of Stranger, are you, Chie?_ Yosuke shakes his head at her. If he says anything, they’re sure to get King Moron’s attention. The guy sitting next to him is sneaking sideways glances as it is.

Thankfully, she leaves it alone after that. Yosuke’s not sure why he feels so relieved.

* * *

**(20:32)** wuu2

 **(20:32)** _Studying. And you?_

 **(20:33)** fml!!

Souji looks up from the table, pushing his phone aside. “Honestly, this isn’t that bad.”

“Says the genius!”

“Are you two fighting?” Nanako chimes.

“No, of course not!” Both Yosuke and Souji say at once.

They’re working at the table downstairs so that they can keep Nanako company while she watches TV. Souji’s half focussed on his study – even though he’s admitted that he’s only going over stuff he already knows for Yosuke’s sake – and half attempting quiz shows with Nanako. To Yosuke’s amazement, Nanako actually seems to be doing better.

“We’ve been at this for _hours_. I don’t think I have anything left in me,” Yosuke complains, yawning and stretching.

“Hours?” Souji glances over at the clock on the wall. “It’s only been an hour since dinner.”

“Are you forgetting all the stuff we went over before dinner?”

Souji smiles slyly. “That was then. This is now.”

“Oh, _come_ on.” Yosuke shakes his head. He really just can’t handle any more. They’ve moved onto English now, and while he’s marginally better at it than most of his subjects thanks to all the songs with English lyrics he’s downloaded, it’s still a huge pain trying to read the stupid language.

“I’ll make you a deal – we keep studying until Nanako goes to bed. Then we can do whatever.” Souji gives Yosuke his most appealing look, and, well… it sounds fair enough. She’s a little girl. She won’t be up much later, surely.

“Okay. Fine.” He returns to the textbook, doing his best to comprehend the concept of a hyperbole.

At about nine, Nanako stands up and announces that she’s going to go get ready for bed. Outwardly, Yosuke is all polite smiles, but inwardly he’s celebrating. He’s read the same phrase about fifty times in a row. He really can’t do any more.

“Alright, what do you want to do?” Souji asks once he’s made sure that Nanako’s okay. Yosuke’s packed up all his books, just to make sure that Souji won’t try to trick him into doing any more studying.

“Uh, I dunno. Any good movies on?”

They settle on the couch together – Souji laughs nervously and admits that this is usually his uncle’s seat – and start flicking through channels. Finally, they stop on a generic looking comedy.

“This good?” Souji asks, waving the remote.

“Yeah, I’ll watch whatever,” Yosuke replies agreeably. “Geez, it’s hot. How am I gonna sleep in this heat?”

“There’s a fan in my room,” Souji says vaguely, pulling his knees up to his chest and wrapping his arms around them.

“Good,” Yosuke mutters, drawing his legs up so he’s sitting cross-legged. His knee bumps Souji’s leg.

They watch the movie for a little while, but Yosuke can’t really figure out what’s going on since it’s already halfway over. It’s still nice though, just sitting like this. Yosuke’s never had someone he can just chill out and watch a boring movie with _and_ enjoy it anyway.

“I can’t believe he doesn’t notice that she has a giant crush on him,” Souji comments offhandedly. It’s the first thing he’s said in a long time. Actually, he’s been pretty quiet tonight, which isn’t unusual in itself, but Yosuke feels like there’s something off. Like he’s not really present, or he’s just going through motions. Yosuke can't help but wonder if he's done something wrong.

“Huh?” Yosuke asks, because apparently he’s pretty zoned-out too. But that’s just what studying for a prolonged length of time does to him.

“The main guy. How can he not see it?”

“Well, she never said anything to him. And she’s pretty hot. Maybe he does see all the signs, but he thinks it’s all in his head because she’s out of his league,” Yosuke counters, just because he can.

“Whatever. This isn’t interesting,” Souji says decisively, and just like that, he changes the channel. Now they’re watching an animal documentary.

“Why’d you do that? I was kind of interested.” Yosuke prods Souji in the shoulder.

“Oh.” Souji glances over at Yosuke with wide eyes. “Sorry. It’s just… I started watching a lot of TV when my parents weren’t home much. I’m sort of in the habit of channel surfing.”

“Don’t sweat it, I wasn’t _that_ interested,” Yosuke says dismissively, and Souji nods, relieved.

They continue watching the documentary anyway, even though it’s not really Yosuke’s thing. Souji looks pretty fascinated, so it’s alright. It gets to the point where it’s sort of putting him to sleep, his head lolling. He shifts over towards Souji so that he has something to lean on – that way he can watch the stupid show a little more comfortably. He rests so that he has his back against Souji’s side, and stretches his legs out across the rest of the couch. Souji tilts his head to look at him.

“Oh, are you tired?” he asks.

“Mm, a little bit.”

Souji nods, humming thoughtfully. The movement jostles Yosuke a little bit, but he just settles himself again. “You should go up to my room and choose a bed. I already got the spare futon set up, so just choose whichever one suits you. I’ll make us some chocolate milk.”

Yosuke shifts away so he can look at Souji. “Chocolate milk? You even do that?”

Souji smiles, eyes crinkling at the corners in amusement. “What, do you think I can make a huge array of meals but can’t mix some chocolate powder in milk? You know what I’m talking about – Nanako and I got it from Junes.”

Yosuke chuckles sheepishly. “I guess I wasn’t really thinking. Sure, okay, Partner. I’ll go get ready for bed.”

Since Souji’s room is pretty small, the futons are really close together. The little work table is shoved to the wall to make space for them. Yosuke, after getting changed and sticking a toothbrush in his mouth, goes and examines the tiny TV in the room. It’s pretty hilarious imagining Souji getting his head stuck in it.

“Yosuke, here’s your drink – are you brushing your teeth?”

Yosuke whips the brush out of his mouth. “Oh, no. I’m not sure why I got it out, actually.” He scratches the back of his head. “Sorry. I’m more of an idiot when I’m tired. I dunno if you’d noticed or not.”

Souji shakes his head. “Nothing to apologise for. It’s funny.” He hands Yosuke one of the mugs he’s holding and takes a sip from the other. “Mm, try it.”

Yosuke does. It’s good, _really_ good, especially if it’s literally just chocolate powder and milk. “How do you _do_ this?” he asks, poking Souji accusatorily in the shoulder. “Seriously! Are you magic?”

“ _You’re_ the magician,” Souji says.

“Huh?”

“Oh, I – never mind.” Souji glances away, looking thoughtful. Yosuke kind of wants to press him, but at the same time he’s pretty tired. He yawns and sits cross-legged on one of the futons, taking a huge gulp of milk.

“Are you alright? You seem distracted,” Yosuke comments, deciding that he may as well ask. 

“I’m just relaxed,” Souji shrugs, sipping his drink and kneeling on the other futon, straightening the covers on it.

Yosuke wonders if that’s it. Souji’s always quiet, but he’s also always been a little more talkative with Yosuke. A little freer with his smiles. It’s not like Souji’s been emotionless tonight or anything, but he’s been sort of… withdrawn. Yosuke’s been doing most of the talking, and over dinner it was pretty much just Yosuke and Nanako chatting about school and Junes while Souji picked at his food.

But if Souji’s just feeling relaxed, well, that’s fine. Yosuke won’t press it.

“I’m going to go to the bathroom and wash up,” Souji says once he’s finished his drink, and Yosuke just nods, climbing under the sheets. He pulls his phone out of his pocket out of habit.

 **(22:58)** hurry up im bored

 **(22:58)** o u left ur phone here. its buzzing

 **(22:59)** heheh i cant help it tho. we always used to text round about now

He nestles a little deeper under the blanket – it’s stiflingly hot, but he needs to be covered while he sleeps to be comfortable – and is hit with a faint, but familiar scent. It seems as though he’s inadvertently chosen the futon Souji usually sleeps in. He considers swapping, but it would be such a shame to when he’s already comfortable.

Souji comes back in then, in a worn set of sleep clothes. It surprises Yosuke a little – he’s so used to seeing Souji well-presented. It’s not a bad look, though.

“I may or may not have sent you some stupid texts,” Yosuke mumbles as Souji turns off the light and sits down on the adjacent futon.

“Why? I’m right here.” Yosuke feels a hand patting his head and screws his face up. Not that Souji can see.

“Yep. I sure didn’t expect our whole texting thing to become a slumber party thing,” Yosuke says with a chuckle.

“Neither.”

“First you’re Stranger, and now you’re Partner. Isn’t that crazy? It’s _wild_. But it’s so great. You’re just like how you were in texts, but better because you’re _here_. It’s like a dream come true.” Yosuke’s just rambling at this point, trying to fill in Souji’s silences.

There’s an even longer pause this time. Then: “Is it a dream?” Souji whispers. Yosuke barely hears it.

“What?”

“It feels real. But it’s all so _ridiculous_ , isn’t it? Persona? A world inside a TV? And _you_.” Souji’s voice is very small, and he’s speaking very fast. Yosuke shifts around on the futon to face him, even though he can’t make much out with only the dull light of the moon filtering through a crack in the curtains.

“Souji…?”

“If I reach out–“ Souji does, reaches out to touch Yosuke’s shoulder softly. “See, you feel real. Dreams never feel this clear. But…”

“It’s not a dream, Partner. Sure, it’s really weird, but dreams just don’t feel like this,” Yosuke tries.

“You don’t know that. I don’t know that. Dreams can feel real.” Souji looks up at the ceiling. “I don’t want you to be all in my head. But everything that’s happened is _crazy_. And why am _I_ the only one who gets to go to the Velvet Room? Why don’t I have a shadow? Why is so much about these murders totally absurd? And how has everything else worked out so perfectly? Can it really be _real_? What if, somehow, I come to and it’s March and you’re just… Wrono?”

Yosuke’s stomach flips at the sound of _that_ name, even though he has plenty of questions about everything else Souji’s said. But now’s not the time. “Souji, Partner, don’t… don’t say that stuff,” he says helplessly. “You’re not really convinced of that, are you?”

“I don’t know,” Souji says quietly. “Most of the time I don’t really think about it. But I can’t decide what’s the more rational explanation. I keep thinking about it. I guess whether it’s real or not, I won’t change the way I act. But I can’t help but _think_ about it.”

“You think too much. Maybe that’s your biggest flaw. You’re always tossing up between this or that, aren’t you?” Yosuke closes his eyes, takes a deep breath, then crawls out of his futon and onto Souji’s, so that they’re sitting right next to each other, thighs pressed together. Souji lets out a quiet noise of surprise. “Let me show you something,” Yosuke continues, drawing out his phone. “Here’s my phone. It may sort of look like an old piece of junk, but it was my line of communication to a certain stranger for six months or so, so it’s pretty important to me as far as personal belongings go.”

He moves the phone so that Souji can see the screen, and begins typing a new text.

[souji. stranger danger. ur reading this yes? im rite next 2 u, see? thats ur number at the top, im going 2 send this 2 u and u can read it.]

He does send it then, and Souji’s phone vibrates from where it’s sitting next to the futon. Slowly, Souji picks it up and checks it.

Moments later:

 **(23:03)** _This helps, a little._

 **(23:03)** im glad 2 hear

“I can’t believe I’m saying this as advice, but Partner, you’ve got to stop thinking. Just live in the moment for a while, without picking the moment apart, you know?” Yosuke says, one hand on Souji’s knee. Souji glances fleetingly at him, then starts typing on his phone again.

 **(23:04)** _Thank you. Very aptly put… I’ll try._

“Cat got your tongue?” Yosuke smiles at Souji, and Souji returns it, even if his expression is wavering. “I mean…no need to thank me. I’d do anything to help you out. You made me feel so much better in those first months, after all.”

“Really?” Souji says, finally putting the phone down. He looks like he’s trying his hardest to calm down.

“Yeah. I was sort of in this awful downward spiral of self-hatred and boredom. You gave me a little hope.” Yosuke flushes as he speaks, but if there’s any time for him to be totally honest with Souji, it’s now. “You became a real support to me, you know? Back before I knew you were a dude, I totally thought I could have a crush on you. Isn’t that funny? Who gets a crush on someone they can’t even see, right? But, uh, I guess that’s how important you were to me. And still are, obviously.” Yosuke’s just babbling crap now, he knows it, but Souji’s beginning to look more and more animated the more Yosuke speaks, the life and expression returning to his face.

“Y-you what?” Souji says breathlessly.

“Hey, don’t judge. It’s your fault for never clarifying your gender.” Yosuke looks away, cheeks heated.

“No, but… me too.” Souji’s eyes are really wide.

“Woah, really? So I’m not the only…” Yosuke stops. He takes a moment to think, tipping his head to one side. “But Souji, you already knew I was a guy, didn’t you? I said so right from the start.”

“I didn’t care,” Souji says, voice very small. He’s not looking at Yosuke.

“Y-you…” Souji… swings _that_ way? Is that it? Is he…?

“I still don’t care,” Souji adds.

Yosuke’s face is very hot. Did Souji just say… did he mean? “You like me?” he manages, his voice embarrassingly high.

“Yes.”

Yosuke can’t help it. “ _Why_?” he asks, bewildered. “Why _me_? There’s so many–“

Souji rounds on him. His face is totally red, but his eyes are blazing with conviction. Yosuke’s never, ever seen him look so worked up, not even when fighting shadows. “I’ve been telling you all this time!” he says, almost shouts. It’s probably as close to shouting as Souji gets. “You’re special, alright? You gave my life colour when things were about as meaningless as they could get. And when I realised you and Wrono are one and the same, I only liked you _more_ because you’re so…” Souji takes a deep breath and just waves his hands about, as if that demonstrates his point.

Yosuke’s first instinct is to bury his face in his hands because damn it, he’s _embarrassed_ , Souji always manages to say all sorts of embarrassing stuff and Yosuke doesn’t want Souji to see him blushing like an idiot. But then again, Souji’s all red in the face too. Yosuke would feel like a coward if he hid his.

“I don’t know what to say,” he mumbles, and his voice cracks. Oh god, even more embarrassing.

“Don’t let it change anything,” Souji says, quieter now. “It’s just… we’ve always been honest with each other.”

“I just…” Yosuke scrubs at his face. “I don’t like – like, _guys_. Okay?”

“I get it.” Souji sounds incredibly resigned to the fact, and Yosuke feels like an idiot.

“But I told myself. I didn’t care who you were. I liked _you_. Still do. Do you… get me?” Yosuke refuses to look at Souji. His face is on fire.

“Um…”

“Like, I was imagining. ‘What if Stranger’s really not my type at all? What if they’re 10 years older than me?’ And I told myself, fuck that. I’d still like you, anyway. So. Maybe it’s okay?”

“I’m not sure I follow,” Souji says, brow furrowing, but he’s looking at Yosuke again now.

“I’m trying to say I might like you too, dammit!” Yosuke exclaims, and promptly buries his face in his hands.

“You…do?”

“I still like girls, but…” Yosuke takes a shaky breath. “If Okina was a date, I’m okay with that.”

“Are you sure?” Souji’s voice is trembling.

“Maybe. I don’t know.” Yosuke mumbles, his voice muffled by his hands. “It’s just that… I’ve never been this happy before. When I’m with you, fighting in the TV or just hanging out or whatever, I feel so glad I could burst. So… yeah.”

“Yosuke…” Souji’s voice is oddly high.

“Stop letting me say embarrassing things, dammit,” Yosuke grumbles. He feels Souji draping himself over his back in a gentle, barely there hug.

“I _like_ you,” Souji whispers in his ear, and that’s the moment Yosuke knows. He’s so, _so_ far gone. He already was long ago.

* * *

Souji’s right next to Yosuke and looking upon him. It’s long into the night, but he’s restless, his eyes adjusted to the dimness. Yosuke’s asleep, face slack, lashes dark against his skin, eyelids rosy. His mouth’s slightly parted, his breathing slow and raspy. Souji notes, with some affection, that he’s kicked half the covers off. His feet stick out from the other end.

“You didn’t lie. You’re a pretty restless sleeper, Yosuke.”

The two futons are crowded together, and somehow Yosuke has twisted himself into such a position that his hand is splayed out across Souji’s futon, so close that he could take it between his own hands, entwining their fingers. But he doesn’t. He’s content to just lie like this, so close to him, his heart beating an agonisingly slow rhythm.

The feeling is impossible to describe. And he thinks: how can this possibly be a dream? He’s not capable of conjuring up such an overwhelming emotion of his own accord. No, he has no reference for this, no equation or logic that could produce such an answer.

This is all because of him - because of the scruffy boy lying there across from him, breathing in, breathing out, fingers curled in sheets that aren’t his own.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyone who was around this time last year may remember i'm the sort of person who'll update on valentines day even if it kills me


	18. Chapter 18

**June**

Yosuke wakes up and finds the room empty. The other futon has already been tidied away. Faintly, he can hear the sounds of someone moving around in the kitchen downstairs.

He heads down, his feet moving for him. _I’ll sort out the futon later_ , he thinks.

Souji turns around the moment Yosuke enters the room. They meet eyes and _oh god_ Yosuke’s stomach is doing flips and he’s suddenly aware of just how dry is mouth is. Back in April, he couldn’t have imagined anything weirder than laying eyes on Souji knowing that he was actually Stranger. He also couldn’t have predicted his own reaction to Souji murmuring, “Good morning,” with his eyes all soft and his hands clasped together. It makes him remember the way he’d whispered _I like you_ into his ear the night before, and if he'd had any poise at all to begin with, he's lost it now.

“Morning,” Yosuke croaks.

“I’m just doing some eggs,” Souji explains. There’s a tremor in his voice. “Um, fried. And toast, too. Do you like yours done any way in particular?”

“Anything’s fine.” Yosuke goes to sit at the table and wishes he would stop feeling like he’s stuck in a cage with a wild tiger. Are they going to talk about it? _Can_ Yosuke even talk about it? Somehow, it had been easier when the lights were out and all they had to see each other by was the faint sliver of moonlight through the crack in the curtains in Souji's room. Not that it had been _easy_ , just…

Souji places a plate down on the table in front of him and he starts. “Thank you!” Yosuke squeaks, then winces. Souji just nods, then sits across from him and starts digging into his own food.

“Um… I was thinking…” Souji’s doing that thing where he peeks at Yosuke from under his fringe. “Do you need some time? To just… think?”

Yosuke hadn’t realised until now just how much he needed to hear that. “Yeah,” he breathes. “That would be great.”

Souji nods, props his chin on his hand and smiles like he’s got all the patience in the world.

* * *

**July**

Just as Yosuke had come to discover that Souji and Stranger really are the same, he slowly accepts that Souji-as-in-my-best-friend-and-partner is genuinely the same person as Souji-who-tells-me-he- _likes_ -me. Which, in retrospect, should be obvious, but it just _isn’t_ at first.

The first days in school are pretty weird. It’s not as if they’ve argued, or even as if they’re awkward around each other, but Yosuke has no idea to act and he’s pretty sure Chie and Yukiko have both noticed. They keep giving each other funny looks as if they think he can’t see them. He can’t focus in class because he’s too busy examining Souji’s back and the ends of his hair – he’s going to need to cut it soon if he wants to keep it immaculate – and it’s not as if that’s anything new, but now his daydreaming comes with the added edge of _knowing_ that yeah, okay, he might like Souji. Which is okay because Souji likes him too – it _is_ okay, right? – but god, he’s never been so nervous about liking anyone before. And isn’t that weird? Shouldn’t liking his best friend be easier?

Lunchtimes are the weirdest – thankfully Chie and Yukiko are often around as buffers, but Souji keeps sending Yosuke tiny smiles when no one’s paying attention and it makes Yosuke kind of want to reach out and touch his hand. He doesn’t though, because… well, he doesn’t know why. He’s pretty sure Souji would be okay with it. Instead, he settles for just smiling back, and it feels pretty weak as far as romantic gestures go but Souji seems pretty happy, so it’s fine… right?

Besides that, Souji’s _really_ busy. With exams so close, he’s back to pulling disappearing acts straight after school. Incredibly, Yosuke’s also trying a bit harder to be prepared for these exams. Sitting and watching pointless TV by himself in his free time doesn’t feel as fulfilling or relaxing as it used to. It’s like there’s a weird itch under his skin whenever he sits still.

Today, he’s not really feeling up to studying though. Souji’s already long disappeared but Yosuke’s still at his desk, shuffling through songs and trying to gather the willpower to head home.

“Yosuke. _Yosuke._ ” Chie slams a hand on his desk and he jumps, sitting ramrod straight.

“What the hell, Chie?” he protests, because isn’t that a little too far?

“You’ve been so distracted lately,” Chie says with a roll of her eyes. “I won’t ask what you’re thinking about. I doubt I wanna know.”

 _And as if I’d tell you_ , Yosuke thinks. “What do you want, anyway?”

“We were just talking, is all. And you were zoned out.”

“I was listening to _music_.”

“If that’s all you’re doing, why don’t you go home?” Chie sighs. Yukiko, who’s sitting in Souji’s seat, twists around to face him as well.

“Yosuke-kun, did you and Souji-kun have an argument?” she asks.

“That’s… pretty upfront,” Yosuke says. He’s kind of impressed. “But no. Why?”

“You’re both acting weird,” Chie says.

“He gets a lot of exam stress,” Yosuke says, hoping that’ll explain it all away.

Judging by the suspicious look the two girls share, it doesn’t.

* * *

It’s kind of been a weird day. King Moron’s gone, Risette – real life idol _Risette_ , what the _hell_ – is a part of the team and apparently infatuated with Souji and there’s some poor excuse for a bear living in the spare room. He can hear Teddie puttering around there right now, since the room’s right next to his own.

 **(22:30)** teds real noisy

Souji’s probably studying, but it never does any harm to just send him a text. Yosuke thinks he probably turns his phone off when he’s busy. Tonight, though, Souji’s response is quick.

 **(22:31)** _Speaking of Teddie, I didn’t get a chance to speak to you. I’ll pay you back for his clothes._

 **(22:31)** wat?? no need 4 that. i no i bitched at chie but its alright ill just pick up a few xtra shifts

 **(22:31)** honestly!! i was just pissed she didnt ask b4 she went ahead and spent all my money

 **(22:32)** _I can just pull it out of the team money_

 **(22:33)** nah save it 4 equipment

 **(22:34)** _It’s not fair though. You’re giving him a place to stay as well. Why don’t we split it then? I’ve got spending money I don’t need_

 **(22:35)** partner

 **(22:35)** let it go

Yosuke can’t help but be amused. It feels like the phone itself is radiating frustration. He won’t budge on this one, though. Souji does so much for everyone else, so the least Yosuke can do is not let him spend money on this. Besides, since Teddie’s going to working at Junes from now on, he’ll probably end up making it up to Yosuke in one way or another.

Souji doesn’t reply for a while after that, so Yosuke prompts him.

 **(22:40)** wat do u think of rise then

 **(22:40)** kind of didnt think about it much wen we were tryin 2 save her but she IS a huge star

 **(22:41)** _I know. I must’ve seen her ad about a thousand times. No exaggeration_

 **(22:42)** r u freakin out?

 **(22:43)** _No? She’s famous but she’s just a person_

 **(22:44)** so u didnt wet urself wen she grabbed ur arm 2day?

Yosuke’s just trying to be teasing, so he totally doesn’t expect Souji’s response.

 **(22:45)** _It’s not as if she’s the one I like_

 _Ah,_ Yosuke thinks, face flaming even though they’re just words on a screen. _Time for the regularly scheduled daily Souji-induced heart attack_.

 **(22:47)** ok um. wow how do i respond?? am i rly superior 2 an IDOL

 **(22:51)** _Objectively, there’s no answer to that. From my point of view? I’ve felt like this for a long time and it’s not going to change just like that_

 **(22:52)** im rly embarrassed but. thx.

Yosuke winces, belatedly regretting how awkward he sounds. He starts another text in an attempt to make Souji forget the first.

 **(22:52)** how long????

 **(22:53)** _I think when you sent me that playlist? I couldn’t stop thinking about how much I wanted to know you in real life_

 **(22:55)** funny

 **(22:55)** _?_

 **(22:56)** i think thats the day i almost tried 2 confess 2 u via text

Actually, Yosuke _knows_ it’s the day. He remembers it very distinctly.

 **(22:59)** _You should’ve. It would’ve saved me a lot of grief_

 **(23:00)** i doubt it. im still idk. im so weird about this im sorry i wish i cud just… idk

 **(23:01)** _It’s alright. I understand. I think so, anyway. Besides, we should focus on school for now_

 **(23:02)** ur a saint

 _And, he’s still secretly boring despite everything_ , Yosuke thinks, smiling to himself.

 **(23:03)** anyway. ur not allowed 2 flirt w rise

He’s embarrassed as soon as he sends it. What the hell is he doing?

 **(23:03)** ignore that. i thought u’d be studying rite now anyway y r u talkin 2 me

 **(23:05)** _I was studying. But I want to talk to you_

Teddie chooses that exact moment to burst into Yosuke’s room, interrupting his intense gazing at the screen of his phone. Yosuke can’t help but flinch at his sudden appearance. He’s still not used to seeing him looking so very _human_.

“Yo-osuke,” he sings. “I’m lonely.”

Yosuke sighs. “It’s late, Ted…”

Teddie’s face falls. “What’s the point of being in this world if I just have to sit by myself anyway?”

Later on, when Yosuke tries to explain to his parents why exactly Teddie’s taken up residence in his closet, he doesn’t say anything about the intense pang of sympathy that goes through him at that moment. _Right_ , he thinks, and wordlessly pats the space on the couch next to him. Teddie’s face lights up immediately and he bounds over. It’s not the first time Teddie’s reminded Yosuke more of a dog than a bear.

“So, watcha doing Yosuke? Are we gonna ‘hang out’?” he says, beaming. “Ooh, is that your phone?”

“I was just texting.” Yosuke makes a move to stuff the phone into his pocket but Teddie snatches it.

“Hm-hm.” His eyes scan what he can see of the conversation. Yosuke prays that he won’t be able to figure out how to scroll up. “Hmmmm?” Yosuke grabs for the phone, alarmed by the sudden note of interest in Teddie’s voice. “Yosuke, are you banning Sensei from dating Rise-chan?”

“Wha – no, it was a _joke_ ,” Yosuke yelps, finally managing to recover his phone after a brief tussle. “It’s late. We should go to bed.” At the pitiful look Teddie gives him, he adds, “You can sleep here on the couch tonight, alright?” And when Teddie keeps giving him the puppy eyes at full beam, he sighs, “We’ll hang out later Ted, I promise.”

That seems to satisfy him. He really _is_ just like a kid in a lot of ways.

* * *

**August**

Every year, Yosuke looks forward to summer. Every year he regrets it as soon as the heat _really_ rolls in. He’s alone at the riverbank today, having been called over by the temptation of cold water. He dips his bare feet in, ignores the group of kids screaming at each other in the midst of some game behind him and vaguely hopes no one’s going to steal his bike. Not that they’d have any reason to do that other than to just piss him off, since the bike’s still as much of a piece of rubbish as ever and he’s pretty sure the hate buzzing around Junes has died down a fair bit since last year.

His mum made him leave the house on an errand since he’s not working today. Now that he’s done, he doesn’t really know what to do with himself. He doesn’t want to go home – it’s way too hot indoors, even if he’s being roasted by the sun out here – and Souji’s working at the daycare.

They’re _really_ on break now, though. There’s nothing to worry about. Not school, not the murders… it’s a relief, but now Yosuke has no excuse to not figure out what he wants to do about the whole Souji situation. He feels embarrassed every time he remembers that it’s been over a month since Souji first admitted his feelings but they’ve been so busy what with exams and the TV world that it feels simultaneously as though it happened yesterday _and_ like it was years ago. The only conclusion that he’s come to, really, is that his stomach twists in decidedly non-platonic ways lately whenever Souji smiles at him. He can’t deny it and there’s no use in pretending otherwise. After all, pretending has gotten him absolutely nowhere.

He pulls out his phone and scrolls back over the texts they’d exchanged over the past few days. There are the typical pre-TV conversations – checking up on the state of Yosuke’s equipment, figuring out when they were all available to head in, discussing particularly difficult shadows – and before that is the conversation they’d shared the day the test results had come out.

That had been a good day. He’ll never forget the way Souji had gaped when he saw ‘ _Seta Souji_ ’ crowning the list of names. Yosuke had been pretty glad to see his own name closer to the top than the bottom this time, but mostly he’d just been excited for Souji. He’d slung his arm around Souji and pulled him close and whooped in joy and it had felt so natural. Souji had smiled brilliantly, his face so close to Yosuke’s.

 _It’s strange. I’ve never been so glad about getting good grades_ , Souji texted Yosuke later on that night. Then he added, _I think it’s because no one else has ever been excited for me, maybe_.

“Yo!” Yosuke doesn’t register Chie’s voice at first. Maybe because he’s so absorbed in reading days old conversations on his phone, maybe because the kids are screeching at each other even more now – sounds like one of them has been cheating, the horror – or perhaps even because he’s so used to tuning her out. All it does is earn him a kick in the back. It’s probably gentle in terms of Chie Kicks, but it almost makes him – _and_ his phone – fall into the river, so he lets out a high-pitched scream as he fights to keep his balance.

“Why are you always like this?” he laments, looking over his shoulder. Chie’s grinning, her hands on her hips and looking as energetic as ever, which is kind of amazing considering how hot it is.

“You’re always spacing out lately, seriously!” Chie declares like it’s a crime. “Anyway, I didn’t think I’d find you here. What’re you doing?”

“What does it look like?” Yosuke gestures at his feet. “Cooling off.”

“Well, don’t mind if I do!” Chie flops down beside him, whips off her shoes and sticks her feet into the water, splashing Yosuke in the process. He makes a grumbling noise under his breath. “Who’re you texting?” she adds when she’s settled.

“Oh… Souji. Kind of. I’m just reading something he sent earlier.” Yosuke stuffs his phone into his pocket and well out of sight. Chie would probably tease the hell out of them if she got her hands on it.

“Speaking of texting, I keep meaning to ask what happened with that guy from the city you were texting last year. You two still in touch?” Chie cranes her neck and looks at him with her best attempt at a casual expression. It’s pretty obvious to Yosuke she’s just being nosey, though.

“Sort of?”

“Is that a no?” Chie kicks her feet in the water, splashing him again. He sighs inwardly.

He hadn’t been meaning to say anything about it, but… well, he kind of wonders what Chie will think. “Do you want to hear a crazy story?” he says, tentative, testing her reaction.

She blinks. “Well, yeah? Go ahead.”

“That city guy _is_ Souji. Um… he came here and I had no idea. We didn’t even realise when we first met in real life. We only found out when we exchanged numbers. Some wild coincidence, right?” Yosuke rubs the back of his neck and laughs nervously, unable to help himself. It feels like he’s revealing some deep, private thing, but it’s not _really_ , it’s just that he doesn’t want Chie to pry _too_ much.

“ _What_?” Chie bounds to her feet, sending waves rippling towards Yosuke’s feet. She gapes down at him from where she’s standing. “Are you messing with me? Why didn’t you say anything earlier? Are you _joking_?”

“No. Ask him yourself,” Yosuke says, rolling his eyes. “Believe me, it came as a shock to me, too.”

“So _that’s_ why you two are so tight!” Chie exclaims. Yosuke can almost visualise the lightbulb going off above her head. “Yukiko and I were always wondering, like, why does a cool guy like Souji muck around with Yosuke so much? But if you were _already_ friends-“

“Hey!” Yosuke protests. “What’s to say he wouldn’t hang out with me anyway?”

Chie folds her arms. “Well, it wouldn’t be the same, right? Oh – hey, doesn’t this mean you should be thanking _me_?”

“What?”

“I gave you his number, right?” There’s a gleam in Chie’s eyes. Yosuke’s recognises this look – it’s a very evil look, this.

“Oh – come on. You can’t take credit. It was all Souji. He was the one who actually put work into being my, uh…” Yosuke pauses, unsure what to say. “…My conversation partner.”

“Conversation partner, and now he’s your _partner_ partner.” Chie’s bouncing on her heels now.

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, you kinda say it all the time.” She tilts her head at him in a way that _looks_ innocent, but Yosuke’s not fooled.

“Yeah, but when I hear it from your mouth… I don’t know, you kind of taint it.” He regrets the words as soon as he says them. Could he sound any dumber? Any more possessive? “Anyway, you’re just jealous cause you don’t get to call anyone partner!”

Chie smiles, eyes narrowed slyly. “I have Yukiko, of course. Maybe I’ll start calling her partner from now on.”

Yosuke visualises it: the four of them racing through dungeons, each of them yelling, “ _Partner_ ,” at various intervals. He shudders. “No,” he says firmly. “That would just make things unnecessarily confusing.”

“Anyway,” Chie says as she finally sits down again, dipping her feet back into the water. This time she manages to do so without splashing Yosuke. “That’s actually kind of amazing? Out of all the people in Japan that could’ve transferred here, it’s the one guy who you’ve been texting for months…” Chie smiles. It almost looks wistful. “Don’t tell anyone I said this _,_ but… I’m really happy for you.”

“Huh?” Yosuke turns to look at her.

“Oh, do I really have to say it?” Chie sighs. “You’re happier these days, aren’t you? You’re nicer, too – sometimes. And more confident. It’s a relief.”

Yosuke vaguely wonders if Chie was hit by a status ailment last time they were in the TV World – it wasn’t too long ago that they last visited, right? “Was that… a compliment?”

“No! Just an observation!” Chie stares intently into the water. “Like, there’s fish in the river right now. That’s an observation.”

Yosuke’s kind of touched anyway. It’s weird to think that Chie’s paid him any sort of attention all this time, but really, of _course_ she has. She’s a pain in the ass, but overall she’s really kind of great. Yosuke smiles to himself. He turns away from her and stares out across to the other side of the river.

“I think you’re both good for each other, alright?” Chie adds, sounding as if she’s choosing her words carefully. Yosuke watches the play of the sunlight on the water’s surface. “He loosens up around you. He’s amazing, but… how did Yukiko put it? He’s always treading carefully.”

“That’s him, alright.” Yosuke tips his head back and raises a hand to his eyes to shield against the glare of the sun. “Doesn’t want to put a foot wrong. You noticed too, huh?”

“Mhm. You should tell him it’s alright to… ugh, I don’t know how to say it. We’re his friends, alright? He can open up to all of us.”

“You can tell him that yourself.”

Chie lets out a sheepish laugh. “Yosuke… Souji’s a good listener – the best listener – but he listens the best to you, doesn’t he?” With that, she gets up. Yosuke blinks up at her, feeling kind of stunned by her words. “Alright, nice chat. I need to get going. Yukiko’s expecting me – she’ll be finished helping out at the inn, so… seeya!”

Yosuke waves her off, before following suit and standing up. Chie’s given him a few things to think about.

* * *

Yosuke tends to work later now that he’s on holiday. It’s not a bad gig, really – it’s a hell of a lot quieter, so he can get away with doing nothing. That is, it’s quiet on days where Dojima’s not frantically pounding through the grocery store and knocking down the stack of tins he’d spent all afternoon arranging.

“Hey, Dojima-san, you alright?” Yosuke shouts after him, hoping to intervene before more damage is dealt to the rest of the store.

Dojima spins on his heel, apparently not having noticed going right past Yosuke in his frantic rush. “Yosuke! You work here – have you seen Nanako anywhere?”

“Nanako? No, is she missing?” Yosuke feels his stomach twist in worry.

Dojima curses under his breath. “She ran out a little while ago. Maybe half an hour or so. I thought she might’ve come here, but…”

Yosuke worries his lip between his teeth. “Is it just you and Souji looking?” When Dojima nods, Yosuke’s almost tempted to take him by the shoulders and shake him. What kind of policeman lets his daughter go missing at this time of night when there’s a murderer in Inaba and only has _two_ _people_ search for her? He takes a deep breath. Dojima’s obviously frantic and not thinking clearly. “Alright, Junes is huge, so how about you keep looking – try the information desk? I’ll call some friends and we can help Souji search around town.”

Dojima nods. “Okay – thanks,” he says gruffly, and just like that he’s off again.

It’s near enough to the end of Yosuke’s shift that he won’t be missed. He sends a quick text to his dad explaining where he’s going, then dials Chie’s number.

Not long later, he’s heading down the street towards the central shopping district, having recruited the rest of the Investigation Team to help out in the search. He’s without a bike, considering he thought he’d be getting a ride back with his dad, and not having a flashlight makes seeing far off the road pretty difficult. He tries yelling for Nanako instead, but there’s no response. He hopes, somewhere in the back of his mind, that she has the sense not to venture so far off the road anyway.

It’s in the middle of the shopping district, right outside Aiya that Yosuke runs into Souji. He looks rather lost himself, standing in place and looking back and forth helplessly. Yosuke calls out to him and Souji turns immediately, eyes wide.

“Yosuke?”

“You idiot, why didn’t you call me earlier?” Yosuke says breathlessly, coming to a halt in front of Souji. “Or anyone, for that matter? I ran into Dojima at Junes and he says it’s just you two out looking.”

“I – I didn’t think.” Souji looks down at his hands in shame.

“Hey, that’s what I’m here for. I called the others too – we’ll have Nanako in no time.” Yosuke reaches out to give Souji a reassuring pat on the shoulder, but he isn’t prepared for the way Souji’s face twists, or the way he desperately lurches towards him, lifting a hand to grab Yosuke’s wrist before he can so much as brush his fingers against Souji’s shoulder.

“I think it’s my fault,” he says, an honest fear in his eyes that Yosuke has absolutely no idea how to deal with.

“What do you mean?” Yosuke says after a stilted pause.

“Something I said before… it…” Souji takes a deep breath and shakes his head. “I think I messed something up, with her and Dojima. I don’t know what to do.”

 _Hell, if you don’t, then you surely don’t expect better from me?_ is what Yosuke wants to say, but that’s the last thing Souji needs to hear right now. He searches Souji’s face as if that’ll give him a clue on what he can say to reassure him other than something empty like ‘don’t worry about it’ or ‘of course it’s not your fault!’ Souji’s not crying or anything, but his expression betrays anxiety and Yosuke can feel his fingers trembling around his wrist.

It’s probably entirely thanks to the fact that he can’t think of anything to say that he does what he does next. He pulls his wrist away, takes one step forward and wraps his arms snugly around Souji’s waist, resting his chin on Souji’s shoulder so he doesn’t have to stare into those worried eyes any longer. Souji inhales sharply, tensing briefly before relaxing closer into Yosuke, loosely draping his own arms around Yosuke.

“Just think about finding her,” Yosuke says quietly, trying very hard not to imagine what anyone would think if they happened to glance out their window onto the street right now. “Isn’t that the priority?” After a moment’s pause, he feels the motion of Souji nodding against his shoulder. “Okay, so… can you think of any place in particular she’s mentioned lately? I mean, she’s just a kid, right? She’ll probably go to whatever place she thinks of a lot.”

There’s silence. Yosuke assumes that Souji’s thinking, and he tries to do the same, but he can’t help being distracted by the feeling of the ends of Souji’s hair tickling his cheek. If he focuses, he can feel Souji’s heart beating, its pace slightly elevated. It’s nice, but… Yosuke grits his teeth. This isn’t the time.

 “Junes…” Souji says at last, sounding defeated. “But Dojima went there, so…” He stiffens in Yosuke’s hold. “Wait, I think I know.”

Yosuke finally steps back, gently detangling Souji’s arms from around his own back. “Then go!”

Souji stares at him for a long moment. The way the white light of the nearby streetlamp reflects off his eyes makes Yosuke’s breath catch, but he ignores the fluttering in his stomach and makes a shooing motion. Souji’s lips twitch into an odd half-smile before he nods and rushes off down the road.

Yosuke lets out the breath he didn’t realise he was holding in and turns to continue his search in the opposite direction.

* * *

**(23:44)** _Thank you so much for earlier._

Yosuke rolls over in bed to retrieve his phone and squints at it. It’s kind of strange that Souji’s sending him this now – Nanako had been confirmed to be safe and sound at Samegawa nearly an hour ago. He’s been home for a while now. Souji probably needed some time to talk with his family, though.

 **(23:44)** no worries!! anything 4 u or nanako rite?

 **(23:45)** _I think Dojima’s starting to trust you a little more. Maybe a bit._

Yosuke snorts. As if _._

 **(23:45)** _Honestly, thank you. We were both in a panic. I don’t think I realised how much I needed you until you showed up._

Yosuke’s face starts heating up at that.

 **(23:46)** no!! worries!!!!! ur welcome!! etc rly it was no biggie

 **(23:46)** u dont need to pile on the praise and make me get all embarrassed

 **(23:47)** but uh… thanks

Something occurs to Yosuke then. Earlier, Souji had been panicking about something he’d said to Nanako – something that had caused her to run away? Maybe it’s not his place to ask, but there’s no harm in bringing it up, right? After all, Souji’s usually the perfect example of a level-headed person. As his best friend, or whatever he is, Yosuke kind of wants to know what could get him looking so upset.

 **(23:47)** wat had u so worked up earlier anyway?

There’s a long pause, long enough that Yosuke’s eyes start shutting just before his phone vibrates in his hand.

 **(23:50)** _Nanako and I have been talking a lot lately. She asked me what real family means a few weeks ago. I wondered what I should tell her, because shared blood didn’t feel like the right thing to say. So I told her that family meant love. I thought it was a good thing to say at the time because she got excited about me being her real brother._

 **(23:51)** _But today Dojima let her down and she got very upset and claimed that he wasn’t her real father. And that’s why she ran out. It was my fault. I’m still trying to figure out how to fix things now._

 **(23:51)** _I found Nanako. But I couldn’t think of anything to say other than ‘let’s go home’. And Dojima wouldn’t approach her himself. I think he felt unable to face her._

Yosuke frowns down at the messages.

 **(21:52)** putting aside how 2 fix things 4 a second

 **(21:53)** how is it ur fault? i mean i kinda get y u think so but isnt it more an issue of nanako feeling upset with the fact that her dad is NEVER there for her

 **(21:54)** _Perhaps so, but I feel awful. I never meant to put those sorts of thoughts into Nanako’s head. What kind of brother would cause this sort of rift in a family?_

 **(21:54)** i dont think u should be guilting urself for being a better brother to nanako than dojima is being a dad to her

Yosuke bites his lip. Is that too straightforward of him to say?

 **(21:55)** just in my opinion of course

There’s no response for a while, but this time Yosuke holds his phone in front of his face and waits. He listens to the muffled sounds of his dad saying something to his mum in the other bedroom, too far away to make out. Teddie snuffles from where he’s asleep in the closet, exhausted from racing around Junes since early in the morning and joining the search for Nanako later on. It’s very quiet otherwise, so when Yosuke’s phone starts ringing loudly he just about falls off his bed from the shock of it.

“Y-yeah?” he whispers into the phone.

“I’m sorry if I surprised you.” It’s Souji. “Is this okay? I just wanted to hear you.”

Yosuke exhales. He’s never going to get used to how straightforward Souji is with him these days. “Yeah, it’s fine. Um… Teddie’s asleep. He sleeps pretty heavy though.”

“I can hang up?”

“No, seriously, it’s okay. I can find somewhere to sit and talk.” Yosuke gets up and heads out of his room, closing the door softly behind him. “What’s up?” he says into the phone, glancing down the hallway towards his parents’ room. They probably won’t hear him unless he talks loudly, but still, it feels weird to just stand outside his room like this at midnight. He starts walking towards the front door. It might be nice sitting outside on a summer night like this.

“I know I’m being sort of irrational. I just want the best for Nanako, is all. She has such a hard time and I don’t want to be any less than the best brother ever, if that’s what she wants to see me as. Does that sort of make sense?”

 _You want to be the best_ _everything_ , Yosuke thinks as the front door quietly clicks shut behind him. He sits on the top step leading up to the door and cradles the phone against his shoulder. “I think it makes sense, yeah. But, um… how do I put this? Isn’t it up to her to work out if you’re the best brother ever? Like, in her eyes, I’m sure you are, and isn’t that what’s important?”

Souji hums. “I could secretly hate her and act the same way and she wouldn’t know. Would I still really be a great brother in that case?”

“Uh…” Yosuke rubs the back of his neck. “I guess not, but I’m kind of assuming you don’t secretly hate her. Isn’t this Exhibit A of you overthinking things again?”

Souji inhales sharply. “Yeah…” He gives a hollow laugh. It sounds very tinny on Yosuke’s phone. “I’m sorry.”

“Dude, don’t apologise. I say a lot more stupid shit than you do and when do I ever apologise for it?” Yosuke says, chuckling. It’s his attempt to lighten the mood, but it feels kind of awkward, even though he can’t see Souji’s reaction. “Anyway, don’t stress so much about it. It’s up to Dojima now, right? If he doesn’t do anything, maybe you could kick his ass or something.”

“ _Yosuke_.” Souji’s trying to sound outraged, but he can’t hide the laughter in his voice.

“Best brother, worst nephew. How about it?”

“Dojima’s right, you’re a very questionable influence.” There’s a rustle on the other end of the line as Souji shifts around. “But… I can’t deny that you’re right. I’ll stop beating myself up.”

“Good,” Yosuke says with a decisive nod, then remembers Souji can’t see him and feels a bit stupid for it. “Uh… thanks, though. I mean, don’t take this all wrong, but it’s nice that you’re being open about all this stuff again, like how we were back then. These days I forget you’re not invulnerable, every now and then.” Souji makes a soft sound of surprise and sounds as if he’s about to say something, but Yosuke continues before he can. “I’m not mad about it or anything though! Knowing me, I might’ve been, if we’d only spoken for the first time in April. I’m not even sure what I’m trying to say now. I guess… I’m proud? Like, you’ve been working really hard. You’re kind of amazing.” He cuts himself off there before he can ramble any more.

There’s a long pause from Souji’s end. “It makes me happy to hear you say that,” he says finally. “But I’m not any more amazing than you, or any of the rest of the team.”

“You kind of are, though. You never got stuck with the same shadow crap the rest of us did.”

Another long pause. “I’ve never taken that for granted, Yosuke. Surely there’s a reason behind it.”

“Isn’t it that you’re just not repressing some awful part of yourself like the rest of us?”

There’s a bitter edge to Souji’s laugh. “Of course not. There’s always been some part of me that’s a bit of a mess. And at the time, I was worried about so many things. I hid so much. I have no doubt that I could have had a shadow, but why didn’t I get to face it? Why couldn’t I face myself like the rest of you?”

“Trust me, you didn’t miss out on anything fun,” Yosuke says dryly.

“I understand that. I just don’t want you to act like I’m anything special. I don’t even understand why I’m in this situation and I don’t want to be different from the rest of you.”

Yosuke privately thinks that Souji’s certainly special as long as he has his wild card power, but doesn’t say it aloud. He makes a soft noise of agreement instead. They lapse into silence again after that. Yosuke looks up into the night sky, tracing patterns in the stars with his eyes. He’s not usually the type to admire scenery, but he can’t deny that one of the nicer things about Inaba is the relatively undisturbed landscape. Back in the city, he would’ve been lucky to see even one star.

“You surprised me tonight, Yosuke,” Souji says, breaking the silence.

“Hm?”

“When you hugged me. I didn’t see it coming at all.”

Yosuke splutters. “Yeah, well, I didn’t see this topic of conversation coming at all!”

“No, no, don’t get embarrassed. It helped a lot. You’ve been a lifesaver tonight.” Souji’s voice is very soft. Yosuke can’t miss the tenderness in his words.

“I just… you were just… you looked so panicked, okay? And it’s not like I’m not allowed to hug you or anything, you’re my… uh…”

“I’m your…?”

“Partner,” Yosuke says decisively. “And since you’re my Partner, I’m sure you won’t mind me hanging up now and going to bed.”

Souji huffs a laugh. “No, I don’t mind.”

“Right. Goodnight, then!” Yosuke jabs at the end call button and promptly lets out a groan. Souji is really too much sometimes.

* * *

 It’s become sort of normal for Yosuke to walk across the parking lot at the end of a day at Junes and see Souji’s tall figure loitering by Yosuke’s bike, bags of groceries in his hands. It’s… well, it’s sweet. Yosuke’s not going to deny it. When he had asked Souji about it the second time he’d waited for him, Souji had simply shrugged and mumbled some vague thing about wanting to see him more.

Today Yosuke ends a little late, so he’s not sure what to expect. He pushes open the back door of the building and, to his relief, Souji’s familiar figure is visible across the parking lot. He hasn’t noticed Yosuke, apparently more preoccupied with his phone. Yosuke’s about to call out when he hears footsteps from behind him. When he looks over his shoulder, he almost visibly deflates at the sight of two of Junes’ most annoying female employees coming down the stairwell towards him, their intention to chat clear in the way that they’re staring at him.

“I’m just about to head home, if you don’t mind,” Yosuke tries, keeping his tone apologetic. He’s still got one arm propping the door open and it’s heavy enough that it’s beginning to become a strain.

“We won’t be long,” one of the girls – Shunji – says. Yosuke thinks the orange Junes apron clashes pretty badly with the pink dress she’s wearing, but also he’s pretty sure she’s not here in hopes of his fashion advice. If he’s correct, the girls are here to complain. “We’d like to know why we’re being told we’ll be fired if we miss another day! We told you we can’t work every Sunday!” she goes on, confirming his prediction.

Yosuke stifles the urge to roll his eyes. Really, his dad ought to be more proud of him for holding civil conversations with employees like this. “It’s in your contract, right? You got hired to work on Sundays. I don’t know what you want me to do about it.”

“But Kazumi wasn’t here today – how come she can take the day off and not us? What, are you favouring her now, just like Saki?”

Yosuke takes a deep breath, lets go of the door so it begins to slowly swing shut and turns to properly face the girls. They’re still on the stairwell, looking down on him with near identical expressions that give the impression that they’re looking at a squashed bug rather than another person. Kazumi… she’s a new employee, in the year below Yosuke, and she’s a good kid. She’s diligent and timely and hasn’t ever, to his knowledge, done anything out of line at work. The other day she’d come up to Yosuke wringing her hands and informed him that her sister’s wedding would be taking place on Sunday. Really, it was pretty simple getting her the day off.

“I’m not favouring Kazumi-chan,” he says, surprising himself with how even his voice sounds. “She has a legitimate reason to take the day off and she’s earned it. Besides, it’s not as if I’m even in charge of deciding who works when. You just all treat me as a convenient messenger for my dad.”

“Yeah, yeah. Obviously you aren’t just your dad’s messenger. He favours you, and you favour certain girls. Seems unfair to me.” Shunji rattles this all off confidently, her friend – Hirano – nodding vigorously.

Yosuke’s ready to dispute the idea that his dad favours him – it really feels more like the opposite sometimes – but that’s when Hirano finally speaks up.

“You _do_ realise that Kazumi doesn’t like you, right? She’s just a little fake little tryhard wanting into your good books so she can get special treatment. It’s kind of pathetic that you keep falling for these acts. Saki never liked you either, you know – she was just good at buttering you up.”

If she hadn’t been standing on the stairs, Yosuke might’ve stepped forward and punched her. As it is, he can barely restrain himself from making some thoughtless retort back at her.

That’s when the door opens behind him.

“Yosuke…?” It’s Souji, peering into the stairwell. “I thought I saw you there. What are you doing?”

Yosuke gives him a tight-lipped smile. “Just… having a discussion. I won’t be long.”

Souji’s gaze travels up towards the two girls on the stairs, who both look noticeably more wary than they did a few seconds ago. “Are they causing trouble?” Souji says, tone carefully neutral.

“Mm...” Yosuke closes his eyes and lets out a long breath. Funny – before Souji’s arrival, he was ready to start a screaming match with the girls. But now the tension’s leaving his body, replaced with the realisation that what these girls are saying doesn’t matter. They’re just trying to provoke him, that’s all. “No. Not really. They’re just talking crap.”

“Is that how it is, then? You didn’t really like Saki after all? You just like the feeling of girls sucking up to you? Wow, that’s disgusting.”

In Yosuke’s peripheral vision, he sees Souji opening his mouth, but this time he thinks he’ll be okay without help. “No, I liked her. I liked that she was kind to me, even if she didn’t think much of me. She did her best, and that’s what matters. She was nothing like you two. I mean, for one thing, she would never have said such horrible things about someone who died.”

Shunji tries to interject, but Yosuke cuts her off. “Now, I kinda wanna go home with my friend, so either you two leave now and never mention Saki-senpai’s name to my face again, or I’m going to stop passing messages on to my dad on your behalf. And just so you know, I’m not the type to abuse the fact that my dad’s the manager here, but I’m not above letting him know how much I see the two of you slack off every time you actually turn up to work.”

The two girls glance at each other. They both look a little unnerved. “Oh, whatever,” Hirano says, rolling her eyes. “Don’t expect sense out of weirdos.” They come down the stairs, shove past Yosuke and Souji and leave, the door groaning to a shut behind them.

“Yosuke, you…” Souji’s giving him a wide-eyed look.

“What do you think? I really sassed them, huh?” Yosuke laughs hollowly and takes a couple of steps back before sliding down the wall so he’s sitting on the ground. He tips his head back, letting it hit the wall with a ‘thunk’. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m mad as hell. I just… guess I wanted to try looking cool in front of you, or something. Didn’t want you to have to save me from being stepped all over again.”

“No, Yosuke. Don’t downplay it. You were really great.” Yosuke hears Souji taking a few steps closer so he can sit next to him. “It’s only been a few months, but you’ve changed so much.”

Yosuke cracks open an eye so he can give Souji a suspicious look. “In a bad way?”

Souji snorts. “Obviously not. You seem more confident these days. It’s pretty… nice.”

Yosuke tries to ignore the fact that it sounded as if Souji had wanted to use a different word instead of ‘nice’. “Maybe I am. A lot’s changed in my life, after all. Hey… do you wanna stop by the river before the sun goes down? It’s been a while since we spent time there.”

The corners of Souji’s eyes crinkle as he smiles and it makes Yosuke’s breath catch. It’s so rare to see him this expressive. “Yeah, let’s go,” he agrees, wrapping his fingers loosely around Yosuke’s wrist as if he’s making a promise.

* * *

The trip to the river is spent in a pensive, though not uncomfortable, silence, only broken by the creaking of Yosuke’s bike as he walks it and the occasional buzz of a cicada. Summer isn’t so bad like this during the evening when the heat begins to die down. It gives Yosuke an opportunity to appreciate being surrounded by the vibrant green of the grass by the roadside.

They reach the riverbank just as the sun’s beginning to sink beneath the horizon. No one’s here today, not even any fishermen, which is kind of a surprise considering how long they usually stay out during the summer. Yosuke lays his bike down on the slope and, after a moment of hesitation, takes Souji’s wrist just as Souji had done to him earlier. Souji, to his credit, just blinks slowly down at his wrist without saying anything. Yosuke belatedly realises that his hand’s a little sweaty. Well, too late now.

Yosuke leads Souji across the grass and to the end of the dock, then pulls him down so that they’re sitting together, legs hanging off the edge. He lets go then – brave though he feels today, his heart’s racing embarrassingly fast.

“It’s a nice day,” he says. “Shame I had to work. It’s not as hot as usual.”

Souji chuckles. “I have to admit, I wasn’t expecting small talk about the weather from you, Yosuke.”

Yosuke glances sideways at him. “No? I guess I’m full of surprises today.” He bites his lip and stares down into the river, eyes following the dark shape of a fish flitting near the surface. “Honestly… I’ve had a lot on my mind, lately. About the shadows, Senpai… you…”

Souji’s eyes are bright with interest, but he keeps quiet. Yosuke tilts his head, unsure of how to go on. “I don’t think I’ve ever really been the type to argue back when people try to attack me. I always just freeze up, you know? I feel like crap and I want to yell, but I just try to smile and put up with it. But I’ve started to realise lately that I was wrong to try so hard to make people like me. It just made me feel even crappier thinking that people would hate the ‘real’ me. I didn’t even know today that I’d be able to push past that instinct and actually say something kind of rational because I’ve never done it before. I didn’t expect it myself.”

“You’re growing.”

“Yeah, and it’s thanks to you. It’s thanks to everything that’s happened this year. I dunno… some girls bitching about me at work? Shit like that feels like it matters a lot less when I’ve had to risk my life to prevent genuine murders from happening.”

Yosuke sees Souji nod in his peripheral vision. “That makes sense. I think we’ve all been able to grow a lot. But still, you seemed so mad. I really thought you were going to yell at those girls.”

“Hah… I was _this_ close to yelling,” Yosuke admits, holding up his hand and nearly touching his thumb and index finger together. “They were talking shit about Saki-senpai. I don’t care what they say about me, but it really pisses me off when they act like she was just some sly fox.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m just curious…” Souji speaks tentatively, carefully enunciating each word. “But why do you still defend her? Her shadow didn’t exactly have anything nice to say about you.”

“Hm?” Yosuke turns to Souji, surprised. “I thought you would’ve realised. Like you said, her _shadow_ said those things. Sure, I annoyed her, but it was something she didn’t want to admit to herself, on some level. I can’t resent her because I really believe that she was a good person. She was kind to me at a time when I felt really lonely. I mean… do you think the stuff Chie and Yukiko’s shadows said about each other means that their friendship isn’t real?” Souji shakes his head at this. “Right. So… I just want to be thankful to the Saki-senpai who was so nice to me in this world.”

“I really never thought about it that way,” Souji says quietly, turning away to look into the horizon. “If I were you, I think I would’ve felt really hurt. And I thought about that every time you brought her up.”

“Well, yeah, I felt really shitty at first. But seeing my own shadow and then Chie’s and Yukiko’s and everyone else’s made me change my mind pretty quickly.”

“You’re pretty kind yourself, Yosuke.”

Yosuke rubs the back of his head. “Nah… I just try not to be stupid every once in a while.” He sneaks a sideways glance at Souji, who’s still thoughtfully watching the sundown, the light reflected in his eyes. He looks captivating like this – Yosuke doesn’t want to look away. Souji must have noticed his staring by now, but he keeps perfectly still.

“Look… I don’t know what you’ve assumed,” Yosuke says hesitantly. “I don’t think I ever clarified, but I’m not in love with Saki-senpai.” Souji starts at this and Yosuke notices his fingers curling around the edge of the dock. “I mean, maybe I did have a crush on her. I don’t really know. What matters now is that I never got to see her look properly happy before she was murdered. I’m not… well, what I’m trying to say is, I don’t want you to think I’ve been trying to avenge her out of love or anything.”

Souji’s staring down at his feet now. “I did wonder,” he admits.

“It’s a bit hard to know how I felt about Saki-senpai when I was so fixated on our conversations at the time,” Yosuke says, his voice almost a whisper.

Souji doesn’t say anything. Yosuke wonders if perhaps he’s too scared to. It’s not like Yosuke’s given him many reasons to speak confidently.

“You know,” Yosuke adds, taking in a deep breath. He may as well keep talking now while he feels so open and so raw. While Souji’s so quiet. “I used to hate Inaba so much. I thought there was nothing special here. I searched so hard for someone who could be important to me and see me as important in return. I started to think that maybe I just didn’t deserve anything like that. But it’s funny how even as I tried so hard to find that person, you came here by chance. And I don’t think anyone in my life has ever been more special to me than you.”

Souji finally turns his head, face still angled down so he’s looking up at Yosuke from under his fringe. The only other time Yosuke can remember seeing him look so vulnerable was the night when he confessed. There’s a different feeling to today though, perhaps because the sun is casting the last of its light over the two of them, or perhaps because of the bubbling sounds of the stream and the breeze that curls around them like an affectionate cat. “It’s the same for me,” Souji says, an almost questioning tone to his voice. “There’s no one more important than you.”

 Yosuke feels the tips of his ears heat up. He can’t resist smiling. Maybe they’re getting somewhere after all.

* * *

Souji watches the play of the breeze in Yosuke’s hair. Sunlight slants across his eyes just so, lighting them gold. Not gold like a shadow’s eyes, but a warm sort of gold. He catalogues the sight. It’s something to keep.

Yosuke is warm, solid and tangible. He’s taught him so very much about how to really be alive, however clumsily, and Souji’s half-certain Yosuke doesn’t even realise it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello WOW it's been a while i know. i'm terrible. yes. i'm slower than yosuke trying to understand his sappy feelings. feel free to berate me. to those of you who've waited and are back to read this chapter, thank you. 
> 
> this happens to be the longest chapter so far and i've combed over it a few times, but if there are mistakes i'm sorry (and let me know lol)! i thought i'd be done editing at a reasonable time but suddenly it's 7am, so i'm just gonna drop this and run rather than delay it any further. ^^


	19. Chapter 19

**August**

It shouldn’t be surprising that, of all the people in Inaba, it’s Nanako that makes Yosuke realise that he’s been an idiot.

He sees her by coincidence as he’s biking along the floodplain on the way home from meeting the rest of the team in the central shopping district for lunch. She’s with a couple of other girls that look around her age – probably school friends – and they’re running around the gazebo, all of them giggling like crazy. He can’t help but grin to see her acting her age for once.

He’s about to continue on his way without interrupting, but she notices him before he can leave. “Oh, Yosuke! Hi!” She shouts, waving both hands above her head as if she’s not sure he’ll be able to see her.

“Hiya Nanako,” he calls back. Her face lights up and she runs over to him.

“Were you just with Big Bro?” she asks, coming to a halt right in front of him and bouncing on the balls of her feet.

“Yup, him and everyone else too,” he confirms. “And what are you up to? Looks fun.”

“We’re playing Phoenix Ranger Featherman R,” Nanako says matter-of-factly. “I’m Feather Hawk.”

“Oh yeah, Souji mentioned that you watched it,” Yosuke recalls. “I was even watching it during a break earlier this year. It’s pretty good, huh? Maybe you think I’m weird for saying so at my age, though.” He laughs, rubbing the back of his neck.

“No, it’s not weird!” Nanako says, earnest. Then she frowns. “But the boys at school think we’re weird for liking it.”

“What? How come?”

“They think it’s only for boys. But that’s stupid, right? Why can’t we watch it if we like it too?”

In that moment, Yosuke thinks nothing of her words. He nods seriously back at her, tells her, “You’re absolutely right Nanako, don’t care about what anyone else thinks,” and heads back home after chatting with her a little while longer.

After dinner, while Yosuke’s sitting in the lounge with his parents, he receives a text.

 **(20:12)** _Hey, let’s go get lunch again soon. Just us two_

It’s not even that special a text, but Yosuke can’t help ducking his head and smiling despite himself.

“That your girlfriend you’re texting?” His dad says suddenly, gaze sharp on Yosuke over the top of his newspaper.

“Girlfriend?” His mum says, voice high-pitched in disbelief.

“ _No_ ,” Yosuke denies immediately. “It’s just Souji. Geez, don’t jump to conclusions like that.”

His dad raises a sceptical eyebrow, but then shakes his head and returns to reading the paper. His mum makes a soft noise of disappointment. Yosuke thinks, for a moment, about how disapproving the two of them would be if they knew just how his heart raced around Souji, who is decidedly not _girl_ enough to be his girlfriend. And that’s when his conversation with Nanako returns to him.

 _Don’t care about what anyone else thinks_ , he’d said to her. He stifles a self-deprecating laugh. Could he be any more of a hypocrite? In a rush, he excuses himself and goes to his room, typing out his reply to Souji on the way.

 **(20:15)** hell yea. where u wanna eat?

He sends the text and then flops onto his couch. Teddie makes a snuffling noise from the cupboard, apparently asleep. That’s not surprising – he’s had a long day at Junes.

 **(20:16)** _Anywhere. I just thought it would be nice to go together. Maybe we could go out of town? I suspect we might be found out by the others if we eat somewhere in Inaba._

 **(20:16)** haha yea… guess we’re not called the investigation team for nothing

 **(20:16)** listen, souji…

 **(20:17)** _Yeah?_

Yosuke licks his lips, fingers poised over his phone with no idea of what to say. All he knows is that he really wants to say _something_ , something to let Souji know that he’s sorry, that he’s going to try to follow his own advice and stop being an idiot.

He likes Souji so much. Of course he does – he’s kind of had that figured out for a while now, no matter how much he plays pretend with himself. It should’ve been a sign that he’d fallen for Souji without knowing a single thing about him other than the few details he’d shared through texts, but for a long time he excused it as a reaction born out of loneliness. Souji in real life, though… he’s something else. He’s unbearably patient, hard-working to a fault and his steady gaze, when fixed on Yosuke, is enough to turn his knees weak. When is Yosuke ever going to meet anyone else like him? He has to take this chance. He has to accept his own feelings – god, hasn’t he already learned about facing himself from the TV World?

And when he thinks about it, he knows his worries really stem from wondering what everyone else would think if they find out. Nothing about the way he feels for Souji feels strange or wrong, not until he wonders what his parents might think, or his old friends back in the city. But they don’t matter. Souji’s helped him learn to stop worrying about others so much, to just accept himself as he is.

Despite that, he’s still spent all this time avoiding the idea of being with Souji as more than a friend. Which is stupid, because it feels like there’s about a hundred people in Inaba who’d happily drop everything to date Souji. Hell, he’s seen more than one old lady eye him up like they’d like to marry him off to one of their granddaughters. And sure, Souji only has eyes for Yosuke for now – at least, he thinks so, anyway. But he can’t wait forever to find out if Yosuke’s going to stop being so chicken. That’s just not fair to him.

The problem is, Yosuke doesn’t know what to say. For all that the very foundations of their relationship have been built through texting, is this kind of revelation really something he can just send to Souji in a text? Even if he ditches the chatspeak, texting doesn’t feel like enough this time – and besides, he doesn’t have a clue where to begin.

It’ll be better to talk in person, he decides. But even then, it seems embarrassing to just give Souji some huge speech about his feelings. Souji’s probably the type that would enjoy Yosuke rambling and stuttering over such things, but Yosuke isn’t sure he’s ready to lay himself so bare.

Then he’ll just have to wait for Souji to make the first move.

Yosuke thinks that sounds like a pretty good plan for all of two seconds before he remembers how the past few months have been. Souji with all his cautious touches, never going any further than holding Yosuke’s wrist, treating him as delicately as he would the stray cats down at Samegawa. Sure, they hugged, but Yosuke had to initiate it.

In other words: if Yosuke doesn’t make his feelings clear to Souji, Souji’s _never_ going to make the first move. He rubs his forehead and laughs quietly to himself in disbelief. Then, finally, he starts on his reply to Souji.

 **(20:21)** if any1 else crashes our lunch date its gonna ruin it. lets go okina

Yosuke wonders what Souji’s reaction to that text will be. He wonders if Souji will suspect that there was originally something else Yosuke wanted to text him about.

He just can’t do it. Texting some dumb message like “hey partner i think its about time i get over myself and we update our relationship from ‘platonic’ to romantic!!!!” or anything along those lines, no matter how eloquent, doesn’t feel like enough. But he’s not going to plan out some speech for Souji either. Prepared speeches have never gone well for him.

He’s going to come up with a plan.

* * *

He doesn’t really get anywhere with his plan before falling asleep, instead spending the rest of the night texting Souji. The next day he heads to work and is briefly surprised to see Chie there until he remembers that he recruited her for this week since it’s been a lot busier than usual and they’ve had a few resignations.

It’s during their lunch break that she provides him with an opportunity. They’ve just sat down at a table in the food-court with steaks fresh off the grill – Yosuke’s paying, of course – and Chie starts talking through a mouthful of food.

“Not that your opinion is a big deal to me,” she says, ruthless as ever in her conversation starter, “But do you think it’s a good idea to wear yukata to the festival?”

“Festival?” Yosuke claps a hand to the side of his face. “Oh shit, I totally forgot that was happening!”

Chie snorts. “Well, I guess it’s excusable since you weren’t around for it last year, but really? Do you come from some alternate Japan where they don’t hold summer festivals?”

“Nah, I just forgot it was happening.” Yosuke scratches his head. “Festival, huh… what sort of stalls do they usually have?”

“Hmm… the usual stuff, I guess? It’s not a big festival but it still has, ya know, the festival atmosphere and all that. It’ll be fun going as a big group.” She tilts her head at him. “I mean, if you remember to show up, what with your memory loss.”

He doesn’t bother to snipe back at her for that. “Yeah, it’ll be good,” he says, but his attention’s not really on Chie anymore. Sure, they’ll all go as a group one day, but maybe the next day he can invite Souji to go, just the two of them. And then, after an evening of exploring the stalls…

“Yosuke? Are you ignoring me?” Chie kicks him under the table and he barely stifles a shout of pain.

“What was that for?” he grumbles, reaching down to rub his poor, injured leg.

“You were zoning out. Surprise, surprise.” She sighs as if he’s caused her great suffering before going on. “Anyway, yukata or no? I mean, I wasn’t gonna bother, but Yukiko seems all fired up about wearing one, so…”

“Well, why not? I mean, it’s the festival after all. It’s your excuse to do something out of the ordinary, right?” He hides a smile by stuffing a chunk of steak in his mouth.

“Why do you sound like you’re up to something?” Chie says, pausing mid-chew to frown at him. She looks a bit like a chipmunk with one cheek bulging out.

Yosuke just shakes his head. “You’re being paranoid, Chie.”

She keeps up her frowning for all of a few more seconds before shrugging and going back to her food.

* * *

Souji isn’t waiting for him after he gets off work, but that’s not going to stop Yosuke when he’s got a plan in mind.

 **(19:12)** yo. u home?

He waits for a moment, drumming his fingers on the handlebar of his bike. It’s been humid today, his shirt sticking to his back all through work, but it’s finally cooling down even though the sun hasn’t quite set yet.

 **(19:14)** _Yes. Why?_

 **(19:14)** :)

Even though he knows he’s not really been subtle or sneaky in the slightest, he has to cover his mouth to stop himself from laughing. Things just feel like they’re going well today.

He makes it to Souji’s house in record time, having pedalled a lot quicker than usual. He’s a little winded but he doesn’t bother waiting to catch his breath before running to Souji’s door and knocking. It only takes a few moments before the door opens and Yosuke finds himself face-to-face with Souji, who doesn’t look surprised in the slightest.

“Yosuke,” he says, smiling.

“Hey! Uh, is it okay if I come in?” Yosuke scratches the back of his head sheepishly.

“Sure.” Souji steps back, allowing Yosuke space to come through. “Did you come straight from work?”

“Yup.” Yosuke toes his shoes off before going further into the house. Nanako doesn’t seem to be here today, but Dojima shoots him a look from where he’s sitting at the kitchen table, nursing a cup of coffee. “Hi, Dojima-san.”

“Yosuke. Isn’t it kind of late?”

Yosuke chuckles nervously, suddenly remembering that Dojima thinks he’s a questionable influence. “Sorry. I won’t be here long.”

He waves a hand. “It’s alright. Stay as long as you’d like – you boys are on holiday after all.”

Yosuke finds himself briefly at a loss for words. Maybe he’s earned a few points with Dojima after all? He tries to think of something to say before things get awkward and his eyes land on the empty spot by the TV where Nanako usually sits. “By the way, where’s Nanako?”

“Sleeping over at a friend’s,” Souji says from behind him, coming up to rest a hand on his shoulder. “Do you wanna head upstairs?”

“Oh, yeah. Sure.”

It’s actually been a while since the last time Yosuke came up to Souji’s room since they don’t usually meet at each other’s houses. In fact, the last time was the night Souji had told him he liked him. Yosuke shakes his head in an attempt to clear it and follows Souji up the stairs.

The first thing Yosuke notices is that Souji’s room looks different. The last time he was here it was fairly bare aside from stacks of books and paper littered across the desk and table. But now most of his study things have been tidied into one corner on the desk. On the table there’s what appears to be a half-constructed robot figurine. Yosuke stares at it for a moment, both confused and fascinated.

“Oh, I was just working on that before I got your text,” Souji says when he notices what Yosuke’s looking at. “It’s actually quite fun.”

Yosuke nods. “I was a little surprised, but actually, that kind of hobby really suits you.” A quick glance around the room shows that Souji’s accumulated various other knick-knacks which are carefully lined up on top of his drawers. A collection of books, arranged by height order, a fully constructed robot figurine and some CDs Yosuke gave him, filled with music Yosuke thought he might like. Despite all the seemingly random things Souji’s got all over his room, the floor is meticulously clean and the surfaces totally free of dust. Yosuke fondly thinks that this room is really befitting of the person Souji’s become.

“So, I’m glad you came over and all. Honestly.” Souji’s voice interrupts Yosuke’s silent inspection of Souji’s room. “But did you come for any reason other than to ogle all of my things?”

“Oh! Yeah!” Yosuke turns back to Souji. “Chie brought up the festival today. Did you know about it?”

Souji nods. “Yes. It’ll start in a few days.”

Yosuke huffs and crosses his arms. “You’re certainly well-informed.”

“Is there something wrong with that?” Souji responds, taking a seat on the couch and looking steadily up at Yosuke. The corner of his lip twitches, betraying his amusement.

“It’d probably be cause for alarm if you didn’t know, Mr Perfect.” Yosuke sticks his tongue out at Souji, who covers his mouth as he laughs. “No, it’s just that I had no idea. Chie’s been teasing me all day because apparently everyone’s been talking about it and it _somehow_ escaped my notice.”

“Even Teddie knows. He said something to me about girls and yukatas the other day.” Souji’s stopped laughing, but Yosuke’s well-attuned to the minute changes in Souji’s expressions and knows that he’s still as amused as ever. Damn him for continuing to laugh at Yosuke on the inside.

“ _What_? But Teddie lives with _me_!”

“It’s not like you to be so unobservant, Yosuke.”

“Well… I’ve been a bit distracted.” Yosuke looks down at the half-built robot. “Chie calls me out all the time. I’m always zoning out.”

“Oh?”

Yosuke chooses to say nothing, ignoring the curious note in Souji’s voice, and instead goes to sit on the other side of the couch. “Anyway, I didn’t come here to reveal how embarrassingly uninformed I am about town life. Chie said we should all go together one day – which yeah, of course! It’ll be fun, right?”

Souji nods slowly.

“But I mean, you can’t fully enjoy the atmosphere when you go as a group. Wouldn’t you agree?”

Souji shrugs. “I haven’t gone along to a festival in a while. The last time I did was with my parents.”

Yosuke blinks dumbly at Souji for a moment. Of course. He hasn’t always been such a social butterfly. “Alright, then you absolutely have to go to the festival more than once to make up for it! Once as a group and once with just _one_ other person.”

Souji’s lips are twitching again, but he manages to hold back his smile. “One other person? Okay. Any suggestions?”

“We-ell, I was thinking of volunteering myself. You see, I’ve been to quite a lot of festivals, so you can feel comfortable knowing you’re with a man of experience.” Yosuke jabs his thumb back towards his chest in an attempt to signal that he is indeed an expert. “But this is the first time going to a festival here in Inaba for the both of us, so we can both look at the sights with wide-eyed wonder.”

“Wow. I’m convinced. Sign me up,” Souji deadpans.

“Seriously, though… you in?” Yosuke tries not to sound _too_ hopeful, but he probably still looks like an overeager puppy.

Souji dips his head. “Of course. I wouldn’t miss it.”

Yosuke grins. “Awesome.”

They just look at each other for a moment before Yosuke gets embarrassed and looks at his knees instead.

“So… you came over just to ask that?” Souji prompts. “You could’ve texted me.”

Yosuke scratches the back of his head. “Yup, I came just for that. I got really excited, okay?”

Souji chuckles. “Cute.”

Yosuke flushes. “You can’t just-! Argh, never mind.” He takes a quick peek sideways and feels even more flustered by the fond smile on Souji’s face. He’ll probably say something embarrassing if he sticks around any longer, so he gets up. “I should probably go. I did drop in pretty much unannounced, after all.”

“You don’t have to go…”

“Nah, I should get back before my parents start wondering where I am. I haven’t even had dinner yet.”

Souji looks ready to protest, but he closes his mouth before saying anything and just nods. “Alright. I’ll see you at the festival, then.”

Yosuke nods, throws a “Seeya then!” over his shoulder as he leaves the room and manages a wave at Dojima before he’s out on the street again, feeling like he’s made a bit of a fool of himself. Oh well. He’s used to it now, and so long as he’s around Souji he may as well be prepared to constantly be making a fool out of himself.

* * *

It takes a long time for Yosuke to decide on his outfit the day of his festival date with Souji. It had been easy yesterday when it was the whole group going – he’d just worn his usual casual clothes. And for how ridiculous the night had turned out, he was glad he hadn’t bothered trying to dress differently. For all that Teddie affected the image of a pure boy, he was really quite dangerous. Yosuke thinks he probably spent more of the night watching Teddie’s every move than actually enjoying the festival or talking to Kanji and Souji.

Tonight will be different, though, so maybe he should dress a little differently. It’s not like he’s going to go all-out like the girls did yesterday or anything, but he can’t help being conflicted. If he wears something out of the ordinary and Souji doesn’t, then won’t he look like he’s trying too hard? After all, it’s near guaranteed that Souji’s going to show up in a white shirt with a popped collar. Yosuke’s willing to bet his guitar on it.

In the end, Yosuke decides that Souji’s hardly going to care what he wears. He puts on his usual red jeans and, just to spice it up a _little_ , puts on a different top from yesterday. It’s just a plain white t-shirt, but he figures this way at least he can match with Souji a little bit.

That sorted, he has nothing left to do before heading to meet Souji at the festival in half an hour. He sits on the couch, gets up, walks twice around the room, reapplies deodorant and sits back down on the couch before it occurs to him that he’s nervous. _Really_ nervous. He actually kind of wishes that Teddie would come back just to serve as a distraction, but he’s over at Souji’s playing with Nanako right now. Teddie can be a little scary around the older girls but Yosuke has to admit that he’s always sweet with her. They can both use the company.

Unable to think of anything else to do, he grabs his phone from where he left it on the other side of the couch and goes over to the window. As luck would have it, it’s a perfect night for the festival. The sky is clear enough to see the stars and the air cool enough that they’ll be able to enjoy hot food without sweating.

Standing by the window like this always makes him want to text Souji for some reason, so he does just that.

 **(18:02)** hey. just checking u havnt forgotten

 **(18:02)** _Of course not. Should I be offended you think so little of my memory?_

 **(18:03)** nooo

 **(18:03)** im just bored. be proud ur my go-to person to relieve boredom

 **(18:03)** _Are you ready to go?_

 **(18:04)** potentially…

 **(18:04)** _Then let’s go now_

Yosuke blinks at his phone, taken aback. Sure, he’s dressed, but he’s not quite sure if he’s _ready_.

 **(18:05)** r u ready?

 **(18:05)** _Yes_

 **(18:05)** wat happened to meeting at 6.30

 **(18:06)** _What’s the use in waiting?_

Yosuke smiles crookedly down at the words. What’s the use, indeed.

* * *

True to form, Souji shows up at the entrance of the shrine grounds in a white shirt with a popped collar. Yosuke’s suddenly grateful he didn’t try to drastically change up his look.

“It’ll be good to get a better look at some of the stalls today,” he comments as he approaches Yosuke. “Yesterday was fun but I felt like I spent more time keeping a watch on Teddie than bothering to look around.”

“Tell me about it,” Yosuke says, putting on a long-suffering voice. “And I experience this stuff every time I work a shift at Junes with him around.”

“Well, I think we’re safe for now. He’s pretty preoccupied trying to understand the concept of quiz shows back at home.”

“Poor guy, he’s gonna get absolutely trounced by Nanako.” They start on a slow meander along the stalls, Souji closely inspecting them as if he’s on quality control duty. “Speaking of Nanako, how’re things since she ran away?”

Souji pauses by a stall selling cotton candy and stares into the white depths of a bag of it as he replies. “A lot better, actually. My uncle’s making a lot more effort now. He took her out to Junes the other day, just the two of them. Maybe it doesn’t seem like much, but Nanako’s brightened up a lot. I think he must’ve said something to her to make her cheer up.”

“That’s really good!”

Souji nods. “You were right. It was up to him to fix things, not me.”

“Glad that you’re appreciating my sage advice.” Yosuke’s getting a bit distracted from the conversation because he can’t help but notice that the lady in charge of the stall is giving Souji an odd look. “Uh, by the way, were you thinking of buying some cotton candy?”

Souji furrows his brow as he thinks. Yosuke hadn’t realised this was such a big decision for him. “…Maybe,” Souji says finally. “Nanako liked it so much that she finished off an entire bag yesterday. Do you want some?”

Yosuke thinks for a moment. “Let’s share one between the two of us then,” he declares. He hands the lady some cash before Souji even gets a chance to dig through his pockets and dips his head politely when she gives him his cotton candy in return. Souji makes some faint noise of complaint, probably because he thinks himself the noblest guy in all of Inaba and can’t deal with not paying his share. Well, that’s tough, because Yosuke has every intention of trying to pay for everything tonight.

“Let’s go,” he tells Souji, tugging on his arm. He opens the bag and takes a small handful of the fluffy candy, glancing from side-to-side as he lets it melt in his mouth. The festival’s really quiet today, even more so than it was yesterday. It’s not like there are many stalls anyway – maybe nine or ten in total, the majority of them selling food – so it’s no surprise, really. It’s a lot more low-key than the festivals Yosuke’s attended in the past, but there’s something nice and calming about it. The murmuring hum of the conversations around him are almost drowned out by the rustling of the trees in the breeze and there’s none of the annoyance of having to push through groups of people, none of the feeling of rushing between stalls to get to try everything. Sure, it’s not what someone would normally call _festive_ , but Yosuke thinks he might like this better.

As he’s looking around, Souji delicately takes Yosuke’s wrist and moves the cotton candy bag closer to him so that he can rip off a bit as well. He gets a pretty gigantic piece, big enough to cover half his face when he takes a bite. Their eyes meet for a moment, Souji’s peeking over the top of the cotton candy, and Yosuke feels a rush of butterflies in his stomach. He smiles in an attempt to hide his nerves before pointing off towards a stall in the near distance. “How do you feel about scooping goldfish?”

“I’m pretty good at it,” Souji says, predictably enough.

“Didn’t you say the last time you went to a festival was a while ago? You might be rusty.” They come to a stop in front of the tub of fish and the elderly man next to it smiles at them. Souji sputters as Yosuke once again pays for both of them, Yosuke sending a cheeky look over his shoulder. The man hands them each a scoop and a bowl and the two of them crouch down.

“I feel like you’re taking me out on a date,” Souji says quietly after a moment, before either of them have even dipped their scoops into the water. He leans in close so that he won’t be overhead. Yosuke can feel his breath on his ear. “Leading me around, paying for everything.”

Yosuke averts his eyes. “Maybe I am,” he hedges.

Souji says nothing. When Yosuke sneaks a look, he finds the other boy staring determinedly at the darting fish in the water, the tips of his ears red. He can’t help but feel a little proud that he’s seeing Souji at a loss for words because of something he said.

“It’s been ages since I’ve done this,” Souji says, his voice perfectly even. Damn, Yosuke’s going to have to up his game to make him _really_ flustered. “But watch.”

Looking the picture of composure, he picks a target and slowly starts lowering the scoop and the bowl, angling the scoop so that if he flicks it just right, it’ll send the goldfish into the waiting bowl. Yosuke sits back on his haunches, curious to see if Souji’s really as good as he claims. He counts down in his head. _Three, two, one…_

Souji moves the scoop suddenly and the goldfish is caught briefly in the scoop before it flips frantically and swims away, free. Souji blinks, mouth hanging slightly open. Yosuke, meanwhile, bursts into unrestrained laughter, falling back on his ass. Souji gives him a disapproving look, but Yosuke just can’t help himself. After a moment, Souji presses his lips together in an attempt to stop a smile, his eyes sparkling fondly at the sight of Yosuke cackling on the ground.

“It’s not that funny, you know,” Souji says, not sounding offended in the slightest. “Like you said: I’m rusty.”

“I’m sorry,” Yosuke manages to say between bouts of laughter. He takes a deep breath, fanning his face. “It’s just the way you asked me to watch you – and then you got so serious. And then your face when it got away, you just…” He stops talking, knowing if he doesn’t he’ll start laughing again at the thought of Souji’s expression.

“I promise you I used to be really good at it!” Souji insists. “My parents never let me keep the fish, but one time I caught five with one scoop!”

“Oh?” Yosuke tilts his head at him, a challenging sparkle in his eyes. “Five whole fish?”

Five minutes later, Souji’s sitting out, his scoop having broken before he could catch a single fish. He’s holding onto what’s left of their cotton candy, ripping pieces off it and stuffing them into his mouth in a resigned manner. Meanwhile, Yosuke’s humming under his breath, eyes keenly following the lazy path of a bright red fish. Six tiny fish are already darting about in his bowl.

“I should’ve known,” Souji says, coming forward to rest his chin on Yosuke’s shoulder so he can get a better look. Yosuke tenses a tiny bit, shooting quick looks back and forth to see if anyone’s watching them. But there’s barely anyone around – no one’s even looking in their direction. He relaxes again and allows Souji to drape an arm lightly around his waist. “You’re always so agile in the dungeons.” Souji continues. “Still, how are you so good at this when you fumble your knives all the time?”

“A lot of practice. I wanted to impress my friends back at my old school.” Yosuke tilts his head a tiny bit so it bumps against Souji’s. “But it’s more fun impressing you.”

“Did you impress them?”

Yosuke shrugs. “Dunno. I don’t think they were that interested in goldfish scooping. The last festival I went to with them, they ran off to play some basketball game when I was the only one left with a scoop.” He slowly lowers the scoop again, careful not to scare the fish. “It was hard to keep everyone together back then. My friends had a habit of getting distracted and wandering off. I don’t think we were there to make memories or anything deep like that. It was all about the food, the games, girls in yukata…” He makes an attempt to catch the fish he’s had his eye on, but it twists out of reach. His scoop’s still intact, though, so he searches for a new target.

“I think my parents wanted us to make memories, back when they took me,” Souji says thoughtfully. “But my memories of those festivals weren’t anything special. I totally lost interest in going when they couldn’t be bothered taking me anymore.”

“Didn’t people ask you to go, though?”

“Oh… well, yes. I always had some excuse though.” Souji pauses briefly while Yosuke makes another attempt at catching a goldfish. He successfully manages to get it in the scoop, but its violent thrashing breaks the thin paper of the scoop, ending his fun. He’s pouting down at the broken scoop in his hand when Souji tightens his grip on Yosuke’s waist and says, “So, is tonight about making a good memory?”

Yosuke, suddenly nervous all over again, nods. “Yeah. It sounds cheesy, but I just want us to have lots of good memories of this summer.”

He glances sideways and is met with Souji’s bright gaze. “It’s not cheesy at all,” he says quietly. He gives Yosuke a tiny smile before releasing his hold on his waist and standing up. Yosuke refrains from clutching his heart – seriously, how does Souji manage to affect him to the point where it races like this? – and gets up too, the bowl of goldfish in his hands.

The old man in charge of the goldfish scooping smiles serenely at him when they meet eyes. Yosuke flushes – he’d totally forgotten that the guy was right there. Hopefully he didn’t think they were weird. “Well done,” he says, clapping his hands together. “I hope you don’t want another go. You might scoop the pool dry!”

“Oh, no, I think we’re done.” Yosuke looks down at the fish. “Actually, I don’t really want them. The last time I brought this many fish home, my dad yelled at me.”

“Well, that’s no good,” the old man says. “Does your friend there want them?”

 Yosuke looks over at Souji, who has a contemplative look on his face. “You don’t have anything to keep them in, do you?” Yosuke accuses. “Don’t tell me you’re thinking of giving them to the cats?”

The guilty look on Souji’s face says it all.

Yosuke tips the fish back into the pool and waves to the old man as they move along towards the steps in front of the offertory box. Souji walks confidently forward like he’s been here a million times. He looks up at the newly renovated shrine, bright-eyed, before holding out the bag of cotton candy to Yosuke. “Can you hold this while I make a wish?”

Yosuke blinks at him. Souji’s expression has such a youthful quality to it, his gaze soft and hopeful. It’s not a look Yosuke’s ever seen on him before. That, combined with the cotton candy he’s holding, makes Yosuke briefly imagine a younger Souji, a version of him filled with curiosity for the world and for other people, just as he _should’ve_ been back then. Just as he is now. A surge of protectiveness swells in him as he silently takes the cotton candy and watches Souji turn back to the shrine. He clasps his hands together, closes his eyes and bows his head, mouthing something unreadable to Yosuke. Then he opens his eyes and turns back to Yosuke, expression soft.

“Your turn.”

Yosuke hands over the cotton candy and steps forward, wracking his brain for ideas. It doesn’t take him too long to decide. He presses his hands together and thinks, _I wish for Souji and I to be together for a long time. Please._ After a moment, he opens his eyes and looks up into the dark expanse of the sky. A warm breeze curls briefly around him, ruffling his hair.

Of course, whether his wish comes true is up to him and whether he’ll be enough to make Souji want to stay by his side. But, he thinks as he watches Souji stuff piece after piece of cotton candy into his mouth, there’s no harm in making wishes.

* * *

After they’re done wandering around the stalls, they head up the hill overlooking Inaba, bellies full with okonomiyaki. They sit together on the grass, backs resting against the fence that runs along the slope.

“Thank you for inviting me tonight,” Souji says, voice gentle. “Was that our second date?”

“Second _official_ date.” Yosuke plays with a blade of grass next to him, finding it hard to look at Souji. He was the one to suggest coming up here, stopping Souji from saying goodbye after they left the shrine. _Let’s go talk by ourselves somewhere_ , he’d said. Souji had just nodded and let Yosuke walk him here, slipping a hand into his when they were out of the shopping district. Their hands are still interlaced now, resting in the space between their legs. Yosuke’s finding it hard to look at that, too.

This is all a part of the plan he’d worked out for tonight, but his nerves are sort of killing him. He wonders if Souji can tell.

“What do you mean, official?”

“Well, the first one was when we hung out in Okina, right? And this is the second. But we’ve hung out together so many times now… surely some of those were unofficial dates?”

Souji laughs. “That might be stretching it, but alright.”

They sit in silence for a while and it’s comfortable like this, just coexisting with their hands twined, Souji’s fingers warm around Yosuke’s. Slowly, Yosuke turns his head, gathering up his courage. Souji’s not looking back. He’s staring up into the sky, eyes tracing patterns unseen to Yosuke.

There he is, the boy who managed to enamour him with a few text messages. The boy who provided him with the support and the friendship he so desperately longed for, and even now stays by his side without Yosuke having to do anything but be himself. He finds himself bewildered all over again that this is reality, that his texting partner with a silly nickname is really beside him, as if fate guided them together. Yosuke usually isn’t the type to believe in such a sentiment, but tonight, with his heart aching with a thousand different emotions, he allows himself to think that maybe fate really does intend them to be together.

“It scares me,” Souji says suddenly, the soft, warm expression on his face dissolving. “When I think about leaving Inaba.”

“…What?” Yosuke tightens his grip on Souji’s hand. “Souji?”

“I’m only here for second year, remember?” Souji looks down at their hands, face pinched. “I’ll be moving back to the city March next year.”

Yosuke does remember. It’s just that he doesn’t want to. Not now. Not tonight.

”When I leave this town behind, will everyone forget me?” Souji says, tone oddly flat. “Will any of what I’ve done mean anything? And everyone… all my friends will all still be here. You’ll be here. And you’ll continue to get along just fine. In the end, does it mean anything more than a dream?”

“Souji,” Yosuke says, voice shaking. “Do you know what I wished for at the shrine?”

Souji looks up at him and shakes his head.

“I tried to think of something really deep,” Yosuke says, gaining confidence the more he talks. Souji, distracted from his own thoughts momentarily, listens with interest. “In the end, I just wished for you and me to be together for a long time. And I don’t even know if wishes mean anything, but just thinking about it and hoping for it made me realise how much I’m willing to do to be by your side. Souji, maybe it won’t be next year, but I promise you that we’re going to find our way back to each other again. I mean…” Yosuke ducks his head, cheeks flushed. “Us meeting here was a miracle. From here on out, it should be easy in comparison, right?”

Souji presses his lips together, eyes fixated on Yosuke’s face. He looks like he’s fighting back tears. Yosuke’s about to reach out to comfort him when Souji’s face breaks out into a smile, open affection written all over his face. He opens his mouth as if to say something, but stops himself and just stares at Yosuke thoughtfully for another moment. “Here I am, worried about silly things as usual,” he says, finally looking away, back up at the stars. “Thank you Yosuke. For tonight’s memories and for everything.”

Yosuke shifts closer to him so that their thighs press together, lifting their joined hands to rest on top of their legs. He can’t help but think that this is hardly a permanent fix for Souji’s worries. Still, Yosuke intends to do everything he can tonight, and for as long as Souji’s here, to reassure him that everything’s going to be fine.

Inaba will never forget Souji. He’s changed it and it’s changed him. He’s irreversibly affected the lives of so many people here, most of all Yosuke’s. And even if some townsperson here or there forgets, Yosuke won’t. He stares at Souji, who’s pensively watching the stars, and commits how he is in this moment to memory.

He knows it for sure, now, that he’ll do anything to make Souji happy. Whatever it takes.

* * *

Souji’s looking at the stars, even though Yosuke’s beside him and a lot more interesting to look at than any constellation he knows of. He’s not usually embarrassed about looking at Yosuke, but there’s been a strange, determined energy to the other boy all night, and Souji finds himself feeling a little shy, as if it’s the first time they’re meeting.

He wonders if there’ll be any shooting stars tonight. Probably not, of course, but he wants to make another wish with Yosuke right here beside him. He wants to make the same wish as Yosuke. Looking back, his wish at the shrine seems thoughtless. Like just a whim.

 _I wish I could kiss Yosuke_ , he’d thought back then. And certainly, it had been a sincere wish, but it was a bit of a silly one. _Wishes are silly anyway,_ he thinks to himself. _And kisses, too. They’re full of meaning, but a kiss is only one moment of the many we could share together._

“What are you thinking about?” Yosuke murmurs, touching Souji’s shoulder with his free hand. Souji’s noticed that Yosuke’s a lot quicker to initiate contact between them lately. It’s reassuring. Souji’s never sure what he’s allowed when it comes to Yosuke. Perhaps it’s patronising to treat him the same as a stray cat, but this is such unfamiliar territory for him.

“I’m thinking about the wish I made,” Souji says simply, honestly. “And about kissing.”

Yosuke lets out a disbelieving laugh, but he doesn’t untangle his hand from Souji’s. He doesn’t move away. “You…” he trails off, then adds in a tiny voice, “Kissing me?”

Souji glances sideways at Yosuke. It’s almost too dark to tell, but he’s definitely flushed in the cheeks. Souji gives him a small smile. “No. Just kisses in general,” he says, his tone teasing.

Yosuke regards him with drowsy, affectionate eyes. “Sure, you were thinking about kisses in general,” he says, shaking his head slowly. Then, he shifts marginally closer, hand still laced in Souji’s, and presses their lips together, gently, chastely.

Souji sees no shooting stars cross the sky that night, but as Yosuke’s fingers curl tightly around his, he thinks he probably doesn’t need them anyway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my strange pattern of updating near exclusively in january and february continues!
> 
> i'd like to give a big thanks to every person who commented on the last chapter. i was really happy to spot so many familiar commenters! thanks for sticking around.
> 
> (one day i might write the aftermath of the end of the chapter and upload it somewhere - believe me, they're both freaking out lol)


	20. Chapter 20

**March**

It’s the 19th of March and, according to Yosuke’s phone, there’s one day, nineteen hours and twelve minutes until Souji gets on the train out of Inaba. Yosuke’s lying alone on the couch in Souji’s room, arms raised across his eyes to shield them from the sun and trying not to think about anything. Ever since the fog lifted, the air’s felt fresher and the very atmosphere of Inaba brighter. Yosuke’s mood, however, is anything but bright.

Souji had asked him to come here today so they could spend the day together. “I’m going to go talk to everyone I’ve befriended the day before I leave,” he’d said quietly over the phone, his voice carefully flat. “But I want a full day with you first, if that’s okay.”

Of course it’s okay. It doesn’t even really feel like enough.

They’ve had a year together, a year so extraordinary that Yosuke knows he should be grateful. And he is, but that doesn’t stop him wishing for more. There was the case, of course, but they fit in so many moments together around saving Inaba.

He thinks of their winter trip, Souji pressing him down into the snow to kiss him when they found themselves split up from the rest of the team. He didn’t stop until Yosuke started shivering and then he spent the rest of the night looking apologetic, much to Yosuke’s amusement.

Then there was Valentines, when Souji dropped a bag of handmade chocolates on his desk with an innocent look on his face while Chie pointed at them and spluttered. Souji said to her, “Isn’t Valentines all about showing appreciation to the people you like most?” even as Yosuke buried his face in his hands to cover his blush. Since then, Yosuke’s noticed the entire Investigation Team watching the two of them closely. Souji seems to love the attention, often touching Yosuke more than is strictly necessary when they’re around the others.

Right now Souji’s downstairs talking to Dojima and Nanako, who are about to leave on a shopping expedition to Junes for a few hours. When Yosuke had seen Nanako earlier she’d seemed so crestfallen despite the broad smile she’d welcomed him with. He wonders if she was able to see through his smile as well.

Just as he’s wondering how Nanako’s going to cope, Souji himself appears at the entrance of the room and shuts the door quietly behind him. Yosuke shifts his arms so he can peek at Souji through them.

“You made it at last,” he says, giving Souji a small smile.

“Sorry. Nanako’s been a bit clingy the past few days. She didn’t want to leave.” Souji walks over to the couch and stands there with his arms crossed expectantly. Yosuke’s not going to move, though – he’s quite comfortable, thanks. So Souji shrugs and gets on as well, crawling up so his face hovers above Yosuke’s. Then he lays down just like that, tucking his face into Yosuke’s shoulder. Despite the sunlight filtering into the room, the air is pretty chilly, so Souji’s warm weight is welcome.

“You’re comfortable,” he mumbles into Yosuke’s shirt. “Let’s nap here.”

“No way,” Yosuke says immediately, bringing an arm up to wrap around Souji’s back. “I’ll move around in my sleep like I always do and then you know what’ll happen? I’ll knock you off the couch and you’ll wake up on the floor with an ache in your back.”

“I trust you. Let’s just stay like this.”

Yosuke swallows around the lump in his throat. “Yeah. Alright.”

They lay there in silence. Souji’s breathing is so slow that it makes Yosuke wonder if he really is going off to sleep. Yosuke won’t mind if he does, but shouldn’t they spend their last whole day together doing something a little more special? Yosuke suddenly wishes he’d thought of some grand scheme, some date to rival all of their past outings. A memory that Souji will treasure for as long as he lives.

It’s not like Yosuke’s worried that Souji will forget him. He knows it’s ridiculous to think that their bond isn’t strong enough to handle a bit of distance now. In so many ways, their relationship is precious. Irreplaceable.

But that doesn’t mean there won’t be new people in Souji’s future. The way he is now, so strong, charming and intelligent, people will inevitably be drawn to him. And Souji is so open these days. He’s kind and he’s curious and he’s absolutely going to make new friends. Maybe they won’t be as special to him as his friends here in Inaba. But they’ll be there in his everyday life, clamouring for his attention, while Yosuke will spend another year here, seeing the same old people and the same old sights with no Souji to light up his days.

He squeezes his eyes shut against the tears that threaten to spill. Perhaps he’s spent too much time reassuring Souji and not enough time reassuring himself.

Just then, Souji shifts against Yosuke. “It seems like you’ve got something on your mind,” he says, lifting himself so that his face is hovering over Yosuke’s again.

Yosuke averts his eyes, but he’s pretty sure Souji can see his distress. “I don’t want you to go,” he says honestly, voice coming out more plaintive than he would like.

Souji’s eyes soften. “I know. I don’t want to go. You know that.”

“Yeah.” Yosuke scrubs a hand across his face, feeling raw beneath Souji’s gaze. “I just don’t want us to go back to being texting buddies when we’ve had so much more this year.”

“We won’t just be texting buddies,” Souji says, bringing a hand up to Yosuke’s face, his thumb rubbing comforting circles into Yosuke’s cheek. “We’ll call too. Video calls. And I’ll be back in no time for Golden Week. I’ll be back at every single opportunity I get.”

“I know.” Yosuke does. They’ve discussed it several times now, but it had usually been for Souji’s benefit more than Yosuke’s. Souji had often panicked over the idea of being split apart from the rest of their team, and it makes Yosuke feel awful to be getting upset like this now when at least he gets to stay in Inaba. Souji’s facing a year without his closest friends, without the familiar places, without Dojima and Nanako, who he’s said more than once are more family to him than his own parents.                                                                           

But Yosuke’s scared. Things are so much more uncertain when their main method of communication is texting. He hates thinking about it – how their relationship had soured back then. The memories keep popping into his head lately, unwelcome visitors in his thoughts.

“You’re still thinking,” Souji says, eyes serious.

“You won’t want to hear it,” Yosuke admits, his grip on the back of Souji’s shirt tightening.

“Tell me anyway.”

“I just… do you remember that one conversation we had around this time last year?” Yosuke pauses there, not wanting to elaborate.

“This time last year? Oh…” Souji’s brow furrows. “Before I came to Inaba, you mean?”

“I’ve tried to forget it. It hardly matters now. And you’ve changed a lot. But… the things you said, about wanting a tangible friend and how we can’t make promises about remaining friends forever because the future is impossible to predict… I haven’t forgotten anything, you know? I can’t seem to no matter how I try.”

Souji presses his lips together. “I said I could change my number and we’d be cut off forever, right?” He laughs and it rings hollow in the quiet room. “I’m sorry. Back then I was stupid. I was so worried about losing you to your new friends and then I went and sent you things like that… what was I thinking?”

Yosuke shrugs. “It’s okay. I know you regret having those thoughts. It’s not like you were even wrong – there’s no certainty in the future. But you couldn’t help it, so what’s the point in me stressing over them now, right?”

“No, if you’re worried about it, then it’s a valid concern.” Souji brings his other hand up so that both hands cup Yosuke’s face. “Still, let me say this. A lot’s changed since then. And perhaps I can delete your number, but I can’t exactly undo the way you’ve changed me. You know, back when I was alone, I wished desperately to one day get to meet you. I even went to a shrine.”

“You could’ve just asked me if I wanted to meet up one holiday or something,” Yosuke says, unable to help himself.

“Shh. How was I meant to work up the nerve?" Souji shakes his head. “Anyhow, during my walk home, I told myself off for wasting time on something so frivolous, something that I could never be certain would come true. Yosuke, perhaps nothing is ever certain and maybe I shouldn’t make promises because of that. But if a wish can come true with me doing absolutely nothing to ensure that it would, I think we can be confident in a promise we work to keep, right?”

Yosuke stares up at Souji, his throat awfully tight. He bites his bottom lip and nods.

“Okay. So let’s promise now. We’ll be together in the future.” Souji gazes earnestly into Yosuke’s eyes.

“Promise,” Yosuke whispers, before turning his head. His face feels hot. “You can be so cheesy, you know?”

“Me? Cheesy?” Souji’s face relaxes into a smile. “I recall you making a similar promise back on the night of the festival. I learned from you, oh wise master.”

“Okay, sure, but you just outcheesed me tenfold,” Yosuke says as Souji lays his head back on his shoulder, breath huffing against his neck. “Thanks, though. I feel better.”

“Like I said, I’m only this cheesy because of you.”

Yosuke stares up out of the window at the clear, unobscured view of the sky and smiles. It’s funny how Souji suddenly seems so at peace when he’s going to leave so soon. Yosuke has to wonder if it’s a façade – if he’s really okay.

“Besides, I’ll give you my home address,” Souji says, cutting into Yosuke’s thoughts. “That way, even if I mysteriously block all our methods of communication, you can come straight to me and punch me in the face. How about that?”

Yosuke snorts, almost dislodging Souji with his laughter. At the very least, Souji certainly _seems_ okay. He closes his eyes and holds on to him a little tighter. And at the very least, they’re together today. Why waste away the moment thinking of a time when they won’t be?

* * *

It’s the middle of the afternoon on one of the most beautiful days Inaba has seen in the past year, and Yosuke is sound asleep. Souji hasn’t told him, but when they go to sleep tangled together like this, Yosuke barely fidgets at all. The same holds true today, Yosuke keeping utterly still beneath Souji aside from the slow rise and fall of his chest as he breathes. Even his hand remains clutched in the back of Souji’s shirt. Souji likes to think that his presence grounds Yosuke, soothing him even in sleep. Perhaps it’s wishful thinking, but these days he enjoys entertaining fantasies.

It’s kind of funny that Yosuke’s suddenly started worrying like this just as Souji’s resolved to stop fretting over the future so much. Yosuke’s smart – he’ll figure things out a lot quicker than Souji did. He’ll realise soon enough that worrying so much is pointless. He’ll see that he shouldn’t fret over a version of the future that scares him when he can imagine a brighter future and see it through to reality. It’s the very thing that Yosuke’s inadvertently taught him, so Souji’s confident that he’ll be okay soon enough.

Looking down at Yosuke’s peaceful expression, Souji knows there’s something more he can say to reassure Yosuke. Something that’s well overdue.

“I think I love you,” he mouths, brushing the pad of his thumb over Yosuke’s eyelid.

Yosuke’s eyelashes flutter, but his eyes remain shut. Souji gazes at him, wistful, then kisses him on the cheek, lays his head down and joins him in sleep.

* * *

It’s the 21st of March and there are eight minutes left before Souji’s train is due to leave. Souji himself is standing outside the train station, surrounded by the rest of the Investigation Team as well as Dojima and Nanako. He looks surprisingly serene, all things considered.

Yosuke feels alright as well. He’s resolved not to cry today – this isn’t goodbye forever, after all. If he cries he’ll just look like a fool in front of everyone and make Souji worry. So he smiles brightly, cracks jokes and, when Nanako starts tearing up, he goes to ruffle her hair and tells her not to worry, because Souji will be back soon enough.

“Seriously, Souji,” Chie says. “We’ll be counting down to the day you come back, alright? And you have to tell us everything about your new school.”

While Souji’s nodding, Yosuke hears a lady on the intercom making an announcement. Souji’s train is due to leave momentarily. Yosuke takes a deep breath. He doesn’t have to worry. Souji will be back soon enough.

The group follows Souji onto the platform. It’s obvious everyone’s forcing cheer at this point, but Nanako and Rise in particular look subdued. Yosuke feels like his smile is frozen onto his face. He works on trying to look more relaxed while Souji walks around the group, giving each person a goodbye hug.

He reaches Yosuke last. He walks to him, his gaze clear and warm.

“Souji,” Yosuke says softly. Souji’s face breaks into a smile and he pulls him close, holding him so tightly that Yosuke thinks he might leave bruises. Yosuke clings on as well, entertaining the possibility of ‘accidentally’ forgetting to let go before the train leaves.

But then Souji pulls back ever so slightly so that his lips are next to Yosuke’s ear. “Just between you and me,” he breathes, so quiet no one else has a chance of hearing. “I love you.”

For a moment, Yosuke forgets how to breathe. His grip on Souji goes slack and he freezes as Souji steps back, still smiling widely, his cheeks pink. “I’ll see you soon,” he says. “Promise.” Then, while Yosuke’s still frozen, he turns and rushes onto the train, just in time for the doors to close.

Only when Souji’s out of sight does Yosuke’s brain start working again. _Did he really just…?_ He stares at the closed doors of the train as if they’ll give him a reply.

“Yosuke…?” he hears Chie say.

That’s when the first tear comes, slipping from his eye and down his cheek. Once he’s started crying, he finds himself unable to stop. He hears the sound of the train beginning to move and hurried footsteps as everyone else starts to chase it, but all he can do is slowly crouch down and cover his face with his hands. _You idiot_ , he thinks, swiping at his eyes and trying to stifle a wet sob. _I was trying not to cry._

Just then, he feels his phone buzz in his pocket. He pulls it out, and, vision blurry, reads the text.

 **(10:02)** _Sorry if that was a little sudden. But I meant every word._

 **(10:02)** _I’m in love with you._

 **(10:02)** _I probably should have sent that before we even met in person._

Though the texts remind Yosuke that there’s no need for him to be so upset, that this isn’t _really_ goodbye, the tears keep coming. He isn’t even sure if they’re born of happiness or sadness.

“I love you so much,” he whispers, eyes fixed on the words on the screen. “ _Don’t go._ ”

When the others return from chasing the train, Yosuke’s sat cross-legged on the ground. His eyes are red-rimmed but he’s not crying anymore. He looks up at them. They look back at him.

 _Geez, that’s a lot of sympathetic faces_ , he thinks.

Then, Chie steps forward and offers him a hand. “Come on, you big baby,” she says, voice cheery. “It’s not the end of the world.”

Yosuke exhales shakily and nods before taking her hand and standing up. Of course not.

Perhaps this can be a new beginning.

* * *

**April**

Far away from Inaba, Souji’s sitting at his desk, half-listening to his homeroom teacher talking about clubs at the front of the class. He’s already decided which ones he’ll be joining, so none of this is really relevant to him.

His phone vibrates and a thrill of excitement goes through him. He deftly extracts it from his pocket, glad that he’s got a desk near the back of the class by a window. The girl next to him always seems to go to sleep during homeroom, which suits his purposes.

He frowns when he realises that the text is from an unknown number.

 **(08:42)** Hello. You’re a very charming guy. I’m interested in you.

The text itself is even stranger than the fact that it’s from a number unregistered in his phone. He blinks at it, unsure of how to respond.

 **(08:43)** _I think you might have the wrong number?_

 **(08:43)** Absolutely not! I really like you, Seta-kun! You’re not a wrong number and I’m no stranger!

Souji raises an eyebrow. He hasn’t given anyone at this school his number yet.

 **(08:44)** _Who are you?_

 **(08:44)** o come on souji!! didnt that last text make it obvious?

Souji gasps and then has to cover his mouth to hide his laughter.

**(08:45)** _Yosuke? You changed your number?_

**(08:45)** yup. i cant believe u dont no me if i dont text lyk this lol

 **(08:45)** ur the first 2 no btw! got a new phone. this one can do vid calls

 **(08:45)** so does that make me the first admirer 2 text u since u started school?

Souji smiles fondly down at his phone, glad the girl next to him is snoring quietly so she doesn’t have to bear witness to the sappy look on his face.

 **(08:46)** _It sure does_.

 **(08:46)** gud. i beat every1 else 2 it

 **(08:47)** btw ur gonna need a new icon 4 me rite

 **(08:47)** i bring an offering

Souji tilts his head at his phone. A moment later, a picture comes through. He nearly chokes. It’s a selfie that Yosuke’s taken. There’s nothing particularly strange about it – well, other than the fact that he’s sporting a headband with black cat ears.

 **(08:48)** _Oh my god…_

Souji’s trying to think of how to convey his feelings on this particular picture when he hears footsteps stop in front of his desk and realises the teacher isn’t talking anymore.

“We’ve got one asleep and one on his phone,” the teacher says, sounding incredibly unimpressed. “Off to a great start, Seta-kun.” He hits the sleeping girl on the head – she shoots upright and garbles an apology – then holds out a hand to Souji, expectant. Reluctantly, Souji hands over his phone, ensuring the screen is off.

With the distraction of his phone gone, Souji settles for staring out the window, hiding a secret smile. It’s not like Yosuke to be so bold. Souji has a feeling that this may be his attempt to stake his claim on him for the rest of the school year. It’s funny that he thinks he even needs to try. Souji’s been captivated for a long time now, and he doesn’t think that’s going to change anytime soon.

If not for that odd text from an unfamiliar number, Souji would be sitting here with another dull year to look forward to. He would go home every day by himself and not even recognise the loneliness lurking within him.

Souji turns in his seat a little and looks around the classroom, at all the other students. There are endless possibilities here, endless connections to be created.

And yet…

There are 28 days until Golden Week starts. Wouldn’t it be nice if the time could just fly by?

He closes his eyes, clasps his hands together beneath his desk and makes a wish for exactly that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t believe it. Did I really just finish nebulous?
> 
> When I first started this fic over two years ago, I could never have predicted the astonishing amount of attention it would go on to receive. At the time I was fresh off playing the game and spent hours upon hours reading every souyo fic I could find. I was charmed by these boys and I just wanted to try my hand at writing a short, fluffy piece about them. I was very nervous about posting it – I almost didn’t. But I’m very glad I did, and I’m glad it evolved into what it did. 
> 
> If you have any questions or messages for me in general, you can ask them [here](http://kutsuin.tumblr.com/ask). 
> 
> Thank you so so so much for giving this story a chance and for lighting up my life with your kudos and your kind words to me. The wait is finally done. I hope you've enjoyed the journey.


End file.
